


Sadistic Family or Baby trouble

by hazel_winchester



Series: Sadistic Family [1]
Category: Gintama
Genre: Aoi Okita, Diva Kagura, F/M, Fighting, Fluff and Angst, Harusame Ship, Humor, OKIKAGU original baby, Rivals to Lovers, Romance, Time Travel, Villains, cuteness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-16
Updated: 2019-02-16
Packaged: 2019-10-29 15:45:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 15
Words: 53,120
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17810852
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hazel_winchester/pseuds/hazel_winchester
Summary: There two of our most favorite Sadistic Couple as always fighting... and there is their Older selfs also fighting... There is a baby that belongs to either... In one word when past, future and babies combine it becomes chaos and funny... You have to read to see... I'm not good with summary.





	1. Babies come down from the sky

CHAPTER 1.

Big Edo Hospital…

"Honestly Kagura-chan be careful next time. Even if you're a yato there are still things that you're unable to do you know?" Megane explained in a calm voice talking like a parent, while the samurai beside him was looking as careless as ever picking his ear and being bored.

"Gin-chan when am I going to be out of here? They don't give me enough food and I'm bored." Kagura complained biting her sukobu that Gintoki and Shinpachi brought for her and totally ignoring Patsuan.

"Stop complaining you damn brat." Perm head said as he wiped his finger on her head. "They give you free food, so be happy with it. Go eat as much as you want."

Kagura pout. "But they give meals only three times a day I want more. After my tenth bowl of rice they don't let me have anything else."

"Well, that's only normal since hospital has to feed lots of others. They will go bankrupt you know, they will get closed." Shinpachi explained.

"Like I care, let them go bank rob or do anything, just give me more rice!" She shouted.

Patsuan gave her an empty look and then shouted. "THAT'S BANKRUPT YOU IDIOT! NOT BANK RUB! Honestly after all this years you still haven't learned anything."

"No, I did learn, but since my character is like this I can't go off and act mature and smart now. Since the director said-" China girl talked all grown up with out a dialect and her cute voice becoming adult like.

"Waaaaa~ Don't say anymore!" Megane sweated shouting.

Suddenly a wind blew through the window and something long and round flew in through it and fell right on Kagura's lap. Kagura stared at it for a second then picked it up in her hands and opened the thin cloth that was on its head. A really cute baby with sand hair and sapphire eyes smiled at her his little hands reaching out to catch her. It was around two years old.

Gin, Shin and Kagura kept staring at it then their faces became all horror filled. "It's a baby!" All three of them said in unison.

"It flew through the window…. Gin-san that baby just fly in through the window…" Shinpachi said his voice shaking. Then Patsuan run to the window and searching around shouted. "WHAT KIND OF IDIOT PLAYS BASEBALL WITH A BABY! DON'T GO OFF THROWING BABIES, THEY CAN'T FLY!"

"Oi, Patsuan you're totally off the topic right now." Gintoki said scratching his head.

"It's wrong to throw babies, right Gin-san?" Shinpachi turned towards the silver haired samurai with tears in his eyes.

Gin gave him a pitiful look knowing what kind of, raised by gorillas, sister he has. "What kind of terrible experience did you actually lived through Shinpachi?"

"Gin-san!" Megane cried holding his eyes with his arm.

Kagura watched their boring performance with dead fish eyes, and then she looked back at the baby and found a note. "Gin-chan, Shinpachi. There is a letter. Look." She showed it to the two men who were now right beside her.

"What it says?" Gintoki asked looking carefully at the kid who was quietly playing with Kagura's hair and smiling happily, trying to figure out who this kid reminded him of.

"Let's see." Megane opened the note and fixed his glasses to read. "Eto~ I'm tired of that idiotic, super sadistic bastard, bakaiser king of planet sadists, so I'm leaving him. Please take care of the baby until I get back. Bye-bye~ Teehee. *Smile mark*."

All three yorozuya members kept staring into the empty space as the wind kept blowing in the silence. "WHAT KIND OF LETTER IS THIS? THAT PERSON IS OUT OF HER MIND OR WHAT? IF YOU'RE GOING TO LEAVE A BABY DO IT IN A MORE TRADITIONAL WAY!" Patsuan shouted.

"Oi, Gin-chan we already did have this baby incident with you, right? So why is it happening again?" Kagura asked looking from baby to the perm head.

"W-well, Kagura-chan, this is Gintama you know we get stuck with the same plot in different situations all the time, but you know…. In that letter…" Samurai said with a shaking voice. "It said "sadistic bastard" and "king of planet sadist" just now, right?"

Both of them looked at the Megane who was still holding the letter, he stopped shouting, looking at the letter one more time and froze mumbling. "That means this is…"

"SADIST/OKITA-SAN/SOUICHIROU-KUN'S BABY?" The three shouted.

Megane looked at the samurai with a dead fish eyes. "You're the only one off with the name Gin-san." But then continued. "So what are we gonna do?"

"Heh, I never though that sadist will sink so low as to leave a woman and a child, what a pervert. So disgusting." China said with a troll smile.

Patsuan fixed his glasses. "One way or the other, there is no one in this anime who fits the descriptions on this letter as much as him, so I think we have to give the baby to his parent, right?"

Gintoki picked his nose whipping it on the sheets of the bed and said. "But you know Patsuan? He is a sadistic captain you know, so to the baby… he will probably…."

On a cloud above their heads imagining Sougo with devils horns and eyes blazing with evil while he was standing in the middle of a hellish fire and smiling like a devil. "Eh, my baby? That's great I needed a successor to pass down my Sadism and curses to kill Hijibaka-san. Hahahaha… Bwahahahaha…." He said with strong demonic voice.

Yorozuya shivered. "NO! I won't give it. It's mine!" Kagura shouted embracing the baby. "This baby…. Sadaharu 42 is mine!"

Megane and Gin stared at her with dead fish eyes. "Umm, Kagura-chan? Who's Sadaharu 42?" Patsuan asked carefully.

"Eh? It's the name of the baby of course." She said looking at him with innocence.

Anger mark appeared on Gintoki's head. "Like hell it is. You can't name a baby Sadaharu 42, she is not a toy she is a human you know, human! So if you wanna call her something think of a better name!"

China showed a disappointed look. "Eh~ But I like Sadaharu…."

"No way!"

"Hmm…" She started thinking. "Sukobu."

"That's snack."

"Rice."

"You're only thinking of a food don't you?!"

"Then Soraichi?"

"Off limits."

"Kagura?"

"Oi, that's your name."

…

…

…

…

"Mooo~ I can't think anymore." She relied her head back to the wall thinking while looking at the sky. "Ah~ Aoi!"

"Huh?" Gin and Megane looked at her.

"She came down from the sky right?"

"More like she flew in." Patsuan mentioned.

"The sky is so clear and it's the same color as her eyes, so let's call her Aoi."

Silver samurai scratched his head. "Well, I guess it's better than Sadaharu or every other name you mentioned." Most of them were food.

"Well, then nice to meet you Aoi-chan. I'm Kagura." China girl smiled with a bright smile holding the baby up. "And these old men here are Megane and Gin-chan."

Anger mark appeared on Shinpachi. "Oi, Kagura-chan, don't go off introducing me like that. It will stick you know." He gets close smiling to the baby. "Call me Shin, ok?"

"Megane~" Baby smiled cutely catching Pattsuan's classes and taking them off playing with them.

"Waaaa~~ My name…." Baby laughed trying to break the glasses. "Oi, give me back my glasses. Glasses… Glasses…"

"No, Aoi-chan, you shouldn't play with his glasses you know? Without them he is no one." Kagura said with mean voice while still smiling.

Putting his glasses back on Shinpachi got pissed. "YOU GUYS, STOP ACTING LIKE MY CHARACTER IS ONLY MY GLASSES!"

"Calm down, Pattsuan." Gin said scratching his head.

Aoi reached her cute little hands towards the silver hair samurai and smiled excitingly. "Curly… Curly…" The baby was trying to reach out to Gintoki.

"Ah, Gin-san I think she is now interested in your hair." Patsuan said fixing his glasses.

Gin came closer his face right against the babies and he poked Aoi's forehead with a troll smile. "That's… off… limits…"

"Oi, Gin-chan you will hurt her…" Kagura was saying when Aoi finally caught the perm head by his silver hair and brought his face down crashing it against the sheets and playing with his hair taking a handful of it.

"Hey little sadist, let me go…. You're gonna tear my hair out… Let go!" Gin struggled to get free. "That's my trade mark you know… Come on I'll give you 300 yen, so LET GO!"

Patsuan looked surprised. "But Aoi sure is powerful for a baby."

"That's my girl!" Kagura laughed with happiness.

Shinsengumi HQ…

Sougo Okita, also known as Sadistic captain, prince of planet sadist and etc. Was not having his usual nap, but he was nailing a voodoo doll with Hijikata Toushirou's picture on it to the tree in front of Toushi's door. While doing this he was singing in a loud voice. Hijikata Die~ Please Go Die~ Die an Evil Death Die~ Get Eaten by-

Hijikata slammed open his door and stomped towards Okita with a vein popping out on his forehead. Tearing the doll of the tree Toushi shred it to pieces and started shouting. "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU UP TO?"

"Maa~ Maa~ Hijibaka-san, so you were here, and here I was practicing my singing. Liked it?" Sougo said with a deadpanned voice not showing a single expression.

"DAMN YOU SOUGO, STOP WITH YOUR STUPID CURSES. DO YOU ACTUALLY WANT ME DEAD THAT MUCH?"

"Yes." He smiled. "So can you please go and die, no seriously go and die Hijibaka."

"I'LL KILL YOU! I'll commit a perfect murder and send you to hell. I'm sure Satan already missed you, there is no one to help him with his plans now."

"Don't worry I promised to send you to him, but he refused saying that he hates mayonnaise."

"Huh…." Toushi become angrier getting his face closer and anger marks all over him. "Are you making fun of mayonnaise? Mayonnaise is a Godly treat that goes along with every meal. Just one taste of it and you will taste heaven. Huh?"

Toushi looked to see that Sougo was totally ignoring him and that Sadist has returned to nailing another voodoo doll to the tree. Tearing the doll into shreds again Hijikata grabbed Sougo by his collar glaring at him. "STOP IGNORING ME YOU DAMN SADISTIC PRINCE. I'LL KILL YOU! I'LL KILL YOU FOR REAL!"

"Captain…. Vice-commander…" Yamazaki run towards them, holding something in his hand, he stopped near them expressionless already guessing what was happening. "Umm… Did I interfere?"

Sadist and Mayo-freak stepped back, Sougo expressionless as always and Toushi scratching his head still annoyed as he looked at Zaki. "So? What is it Yamazaki?"

"Ah, here..." He handed over the paper. "There is a letter, it has captain Okita's name on it."

Taking the letter from Zaki, Sougo opened it reading out aloud. "Dear mister Sadistic Dumbass, who will never become a vice-commander. Please go and visit China girl in a hospital and then do everyone a favor and die leaving Mayora alone. See you~ Teehee. *Wink*."

Toushi and Yamazaki both laughed trying to hold their mouth with their hand, but unable to do so they were grabbing their stomach with tears of laughter in their eyes.

Anger marks appeared all over Sougo Okita. Without a word he took out his bazooka putting it over his shoulder and walking towards the exit. Then he turned around and smiled with most evil, frightening and scary smile of all. "It looks like we will be attending another funeral, so you have to wait a little longer Hijikata-san." Sougo kept walking away, emitting the devilish aura.

"Poor China girl." Toushi light another cigarette with his mayo lighter and looked at Zaki. "Oi, Yamazaki? Why is that China girl in the hospital? Those idiots got into another trouble didn't they?"

"Eh? I don't know the details, but it looks like they had another big fight with some people who were causing trouble. Yorozuya no danna and Shinpachi-kun were also injured, but all of them should already be out by today."

"I see." Toushi started to walk away.

"But I think it's amazing how China musume, can make our usually cold captain so frustrated."

Hijikata stopped turning around taking a smoke and exhaling. "Well, she is a sadist too, so they are a great match as rivals, but also kind of scary."

Big Edo Hospital…

"Oi, China demon prepare to…" Sougo smashed open the door with his foot breaking it, pointing his bazooka right at Kagura, but then he lowered his weapon looking with surprise at what he was seeing.

Megane was depressed and sitting in a corner with gloomy aura around him and drawing circle and growing mushrooms. While Danna was standing his head swinging down in front of the mirror with his hair all messed up and actually some pieces of hair in his head missing and him going bald on those spots.

China on the other hand was sitting on the bed her legs under her and was happily playing with a baby, with sand hair that reminded him of his and azure eyes that were like China's. The baby was sitting in front of the yato female playing with silver hair, which was probably Danna's and glasses, which belonged to Megane.

Suddenly spotting him both turned around, Kagura staring at him surprised, probably because he wasn't supposed to be here and the baby smiling happily with the most adorable smile and reaching her cute, little arms, opened wide, towards him and shouting with excitement. "Papi~ Papi~ Papi~"

This time two yorozuya males both turned towards him staring at Sougo with an empty look, China's expression didn't changed and the baby was still desperately trying to reach to him calling him "Papi~", but more importantly Prince of planet of Sadists, himself was staring shocked towards the baby and the girl that was sitting right next to it with a confusion not realizing what was happening.

"WHAT?!" A shout was heard all around the hospital.

Somewhere in the city…

At that time a scary man set foot in Edo. He was wearing a long red coat with contrast color uniform underneath and his face, till his eyes, was covered with a cloth mask, but his eyes were blazing with fury and hatred as he was walking towards the Kabuki-cho saying with anger. "Where is that damn woman?! Taking my child and running away." Gripping his katana that was sheathed on his belt he said louder. "I'm gonna kill that damn China beast!"

TO BE CONTINUED...


	2. Children look like their parents in more aspects than one.

"Oi, Gengai! Where is she? Perm head told me, she said that they are gonna come and visit you." Tall man with a long red coat asked.

"Oh, them… She entered my time machine and right now she is somewhere in the past probably." Old man answered without bothering to look up since he already knew who was behind him.

"WHAT?!" The man shouted and grabbed Gengai by his collar, his eyes blazing with fury as he was staring down at the older man. "You send that crazy women with my child to the past…? Wait, don't tell me that by past you mean?"

"Yep, that one…"

"I'LL MURDER YOU! YOU DAMN USELESS PART OF THE HUMANITY! JUST DIE!" The man shouted as he was shaking the old man back and forth.

"Wait… Stop… Wait… Wait!" When the man finally stopped Gengai breathe with ease. "Here use this if you want." He handed the remote control to the man and he was finally released from his grip.

"But I have to warn you, that thing is not…" He didn't get to finish as the man in red coat sat inside the time machine and pressed the button leaving Gengai to his shootings. "WAIT THAT'S!"

 

* * *

 

Shinsengumi HQ.

"So that's it!" Gintoki said with an uncaring voice like always.

Kagura, Shinpachi and Gintoki left the Hospital a little after Sougo came and the four of them together with the baby, Aoi, came to the Shinsengumi to explain a sudden increase in Okita household, even though the father himself look as bored as ever.

"That's it" My ass!" Shinsengumi devil vice-commander Hijikata Toushirou shouted at the perm head vein popping in his forehead. "THAT WAS A DAMN FLASHBACK, YOU MORON! WHAT DOES THAT HAVE ANYTHIGN TO DO WITH THE BABY?"

"Huh~" Gintoki came head to head with Toshi. "Then you have a better explanation Mayora-kun? Since we don't know anything… Huh~"

"LIKE HELL! All you did was barge in like this is your damn home and then sat here saying "Here's your sadistic captain's brat, take care!" Silver samurai and mayo freak were pushing each other head to head like two goats fighting.

"Look, Mayora-kun there are some flying mayonnaise flying go fetch them and never come back."

"I'll send you to your damn sugar land for eternity perm head." They were both holding their katana's now.

"Maa… Maa… Toshi, calm down… Let them explain calmly, right Sougo?" A kind-hearted gorilla Kondo Isao said as he looked at the younger once with the Aoi, only to have chills run down his spine.

China and Sadist were sitting next to each other with Aoi sitting in between and playing with Sougo's katana and Kagura's parasol. Both of them were emitting the most devilish aura, gorilla could swear that he could see a dragon and a tiger battling above them. Two rivals seemed as if they would kill each other if Aoi weren't there.

Kondo shaking turned towards Shinpachi who was sitting on the side and drinking tea while sighing. "Could you please explain everything, brother-in-law?"

Megane glared at him for that stupid way he was calling him, but then answered. "We don't know ourselves, that child got left (more like was thrown) in Kagura-chan's room and by the note that's left it seems that it's Okita-kun's."

"SOUGO!" Kondo cried with his nose going Tarzan on him as he looked at the sadist. "Is that true Sougo? Is it really…? DADDY~" Gori looked at vice-commander. "Mommy became a grandmother at such a young age. Our little boy…. He…. He…" The commander cling on to Hijikata's uniform crying.

Anger mark appeared at mayora's head. "Why are you turning this into the damn family drama?!"

Gin made a troll face. "Puhu~ With a stalker gorilla and cry baby like commander, tax robbers are doomed."

Pushing the huge gorilla away and then after fixing himself lighting the cigarette and all this in a split second time, Toushi answered. "I apologize for our commanders deed, but… stop insulting him you damn curly!"

As the two glared at each other again Kagura joined in. With a troll smile she gave side look to Sadist while saying mockingly. "Oi, Sadist which unfortunate soul did you catches in your disgusting hands, huh? Poor women."

"I'll cut you China!" He deadpanned then continued scratching his head and looking at the kid. "I don't ever remember f*** a woman so pathetic as to leave a child to a monster."

Anger mark appeared on China. "How many did you actually nail to forget them? You perverted Bakaiser!"

He smirked. "What China jealous? Or did you want to be the first? Bupu… WRONG!" He made a stupid sound with his lips.

Unable to move freely because of Aoi, but boiling inside send punches at him over the kids head, but Sadist catch both her hands pulling her over. "Besides it still has to be proven to be mine, I'm not the only sand haired character-"

He was unable to finish when they heard a gun shot, all looked at two rivals side to see that little Aoi was holding Kagura's umbrella and there was a smoke coming out of it. Then everyone in the room followed the way that the parasol was pointed at to see that there was a bald thick line going right on Hijikata Toushirou's head, making him seem like her just shaved half of his hair off from the middle of his head.

Aoi laughed cheerfully saying. "Die Mayora~"

Everyone froze for a second all the people in the room thinking the same thing. She's definitely his daughter.

While everyone was like that Kagura grabbed Aoi and fast run towards the exit only to be stopped by Sougo's sword at the veranda. Sadist was relying on the wooden pole with no expression his katana stretched right in front of China's throat.

"Where do you think you're going, China?"

Kagura squeezed Aoi tight glaring at her rival. "There's no way that I'm giving Aoi-chan to a Sadist like you. No way, she's mine!"

"She's not a toy you brat glutton…"

"Says the Sadist." She added still glaring.

He sighs lowering his sword, but still standing in front of the China. "Besides, if she is really mine, then she is staying here with her father."

She smirked arguing. "But this an off-female compound and she is a girl."

"It doesn't count for kids, but I'll figure something out." He said deadpan voice not changing.

Getting even more pissed Kagura shouted. "Maybe she is really not yours!"

"The hair is a proof enough." Sougo answered.

"But she has the same eye color as me."

"She is a Sadist just like a father."

"But she is as powerful as a Yato."

"She has the same smile as my sister."

"She loves sukobu."

"Calm eyes."

"Violent nature."

"Smart."

"Mischievous."

"She hates Hijikata."

"I hate him too and she called him Mayora just like me."

"They're like two grandmothers arguing about whom their grandchild looks like." Toushi commented lighting another cigarette, his hair was fixed.

"But the weird part is that the both of them is right. Aoi really do look like both of them in many ways than one, it's like she just took something from each." Megane fixed his glassed.

"If I didn't know better I would have thought that they really are the parents of the brat." Gintoki said picking his ear.

"Toshi…?" Kondo pledged looking at Hijikata with tearful eyes.

"It's not true." Mayora sigh and Kondo let go wiping his tears.

Sougo smirked for her comebacks at every single thing. "Then lets solve this the only way we know."

Kagura smiled. Putting Aoi on the veranda she patted the little once head and took her umbrella heading to the yard where Sadist was standing. "The one who wins takes Aoi."

Fight was on the pick and if left it will drag till the end of the story, both Kagura and Sougo had no intention to back out, not only for Aoi, both of them likes her especially after trying to kill Hijikata (that concerns only Sougo), but for their own self as well since with all the jobs in the last month they weren't able to fight-

"Papi~ Papi~" Aoi called out aloud so that both China and Sadist stopped to see that the little one was crying looking at their fight even though she was happy a minute ago. "Don't fight~"

Sighing rivals gave up their fight putting away their weapons. Kagura approached the little girl taking her hand she bring her down from the veranda and they walked along side to the yard where Sougo was standing. "So did you enjoyed the show, brat?" Sougo asked dead panned.

"She is not a brat, her name is Aoi." Kagura said frustrated and then kneeled down smiling at the little one. "Aoi-chan wanna go for a walk?"

Aoi nodded smiling. Seeing that Sougo sigh. "Do whatever you want, but bring her back or I'll break you China."

She gripped her umbrella that was now opened above her and Aoi's head covering them from the sun tight and glared at him. Turning away ignoring him she just said. "Say good-bye to the Sadist, Aoi-chan."

"Bye-bye, Sadist~" Aoi said, with a cute voice and smiled, waving her hand as the both of them walked towards the gate.

Sougo didn't reply he remained deadpanned with bored expression and walked towards the room where everyone was standing. While Shinpachi was the one to shout at Kagura.

"Stop teaching her those names! Don't make a kid say such things, Kagura. Oi, listen to people who are talking!" He shouted things like that, but everyone ignored him and walked inside.

 

* * *

 

In the Edo streets…

While walking happily hand in hand with Aoi, Kagura was biting down her sukobu and the little female was eating cotton candy. Considering that China looked young, together with Aoi everyone thought as if they were two sisters taking a walk.

They decided to go eat dango when they run into Otae and Kyuubei, who were out shopping.

"Ah! Anego and Kyuubei." Kagura smiled at two women.

"Maa, maa Kagura-chan are you out for a walk?" Otae asked with a smile. "And who's this little cutie? Hi!" Otae and Kyuu-chan kneeled a little smiling at Aoi.

"Tae~ Kyuu~ Tae~ Kyuu~" Aoi happily said letting go of Kagura's hand and sweetly smiling at the two.

Both blushed seeing Aoi's moe and hugged the baby shouting. "SO CUTE!" While in their joined arms Aoi was playing with Kyuu-chan's eye patch and Tae's hair, two women were smiling happily. "Where did you find her Kagura-chan? She is so adorable! Is she a relative?"

"So cute…" Kyuubei said blushing.

Kagura smiled shaking her head. "No, she got abandoned and I decided to adopt her. Aoi is my daughter."

Otae looked at her surprised while letting Aoi to the land so she could play, Kyuu sitting with her. "But Kagura-chan, you can't do that. Her parents must be worried, you should inform the police."

"If you need I can ask Yagyu to search for them." Kyuubei success, as she raise up on her feet, leaving Aoi to play with a butterfly that is bothering her.

China shook her head with a grin. "No need, her father seems to be a tax robber anyways."

Both women looked at yato girl surprised. "What do you mean?"

"She might be Sadists daughter, so no need to search. I kind of understand the mother for running away from him, but leaving Aoi is making me angry."

"My, my, Okita-kun's child huh? But are you sure?" Otae with her trademark smile was holding her one chin tilting her head.

"Well, there is no other character but the Sadistic Demon King of Planet Sadist as sadistic as him with sand hair and intend to kill Mayora, but even if there is another character who's the Sadistic Demon King of Planet Sadist as sadistic as him with sand hair and intend to kill Mayora, Aoi recognized him as father, so I think that someone who's the Sadistic Demon King of Planet Sadist as sadistic as him with sand hair and intend to kill Mayora might be exactly who we need. On the other hand the Sadistic Demon King of Planet Sadist as sadistic as him with sand hair and intend to kill Mayora can't be trusted with a kid, so I'm leaving the girl to myself."

While the three were talking about how it was right and wrong for that woman, whomever she is, to leave Sougo, Aoi on the other hand trying to catch a butterfly kept running round and round, jumping and smiling. She was a little away from the trio when she bumped into someone and fall, the girl didn't cry instead looked up at the one she bumped in to.

The man with red coat and contrast uniform was standing in front of her covering the sun and hiding her in his shadow, while slightly bowed down and staring at her. "Finally, I found you Aoi. Come to-" He was about to say when the younger girl screamed crying.

"MAMI~" She screamed all her lungs out, hearing that the whole street stopped staring at the man who seemed as if he was bullying the kid or was trying to kidnap her maybe.

The man rose up trying to calm Aoi, so she won't cry when he felt three blazing with fury red eyes staring at him. Right behind Aoi there were three scary women standing and cracking their fists. Aoi seeing Kagura stood up hardly and run to her hiding behind China's leg while taking a pick from the side.

"C-calm down ladies, it's not what it seems." The man tried to explain as he was shaking his hands and head.

"You made my Aoi cry, you damn pedo-kidnapper!" Kagura said while all three were covered with different colored auras that were rising.

"Don't go off giving me weird nicknames now China girl. Listen first." Man exclaimed.

"I don't wanna!" She shouted and hit him sending him flying.

"Kya~ There is a pervert!" Otae shouted with a scary smile as he hit the man with a bat, don't ask where she get that.

Kyuubei took out his sword. "Don't touch Tae-chan!" She swing man hardly dodging it with a jump. Then after that all three of them started to hit him with kicks as he was lying.

"We should report him." Tae success when Kondo came flying.

"I'll protect you Otae-san!" Kondo jumped on her with a idiotic smile as Tae beat him up again.

"How scary I was attacked by a gorilla." Otae smiled.

"Wakka!" This time it was Ayumu who came running towards Kyuubei with tears.

Kyuu-chan hit him hard sending him in a pile of other two. "The streets are full of perverts Tae-chan, lets go back home."

"Sure, lets go Kagura-chan, I'll treat you to some food."

China gulped down, imagining Anego's tamoyaki or how Gin-chan calls it "Dark Matter". She smiled shaking her head. "Sorry Anego, I promised to take Aoi somewhere else. But we'll come visit later. See you."

"Ok, then take care Kagura-chan, Aoi-chan." She smiled at the two as Kagura shake her good-byes and Aoi was also smiling and shaking her hand saying. "Bye~ Bye~"

 

* * *

 

That evening. Kabuki-cho.

"My, my what a surprise to see you here." Said a beautiful woman with long vermilion hair that was bind in two buns; she sat inside the street vendors place near the man from earlier, who was still wearing his contrast uniform and red goat and was eating his udon.

The girl was wearing short red Chinese blouse with gold designs that was ending right under her breasts leaving her belly open. Long red skirt with two splits at the sides and tight long black socks, she also had a scarf around her neck and goggles at her head.

"Why the long face?" The girl asked smiling.

Anger mark appeared at the man's head. "Fuck you, what the hell are you planning?"

Girl made an innocent face ordering rice with lots of stuff on it. "What do you mean? I just felt nostalgic and wanted to remember our past."

"If you wanna remember something then look at the pictures, you freaking moron. You brought her here even though we agreed to not to do that."

"Who are you calling a moron, you good-for-nothing-dick-less-jackass?" Vein popped out at the girls head, but she kept her smile. "If someone wasn't late getting back home from a useless job then I wouldn't have been bored."

"It's not like I wanted to be there! Your idiot brother asked me for help, besides what's with this? You go on missions too it's not like I interfere." Man half shouted still holding his self-control.

"Since when?" The girl shouted beating her fist to the table. "I've been so busy with Aoi, that I haven't left home in the last two years, while you go on so called missions with those bastard tax-robbers and my brother. It was all good until I learned that you were actually showing a fan service with lots of fan girls while on missions, you damned demon's **** jerk, bastard!" She was now standing.

He jumped up furious glaring at the women. "What girls…? The only woman there was that donuts lover and she is already busy."

"You jackass, I'm keeping in touch with my sister-in-law you know! She told me everything!" She gripped her purple parasol.

"Tch. Damn that woman, I'll give her a poisoned donuts next." Man sat down sighing. "That was a little flirt, so get over it."

"And this is a little game, so get over it." The girl smiled and sat down finishing her bowl of rice in one go then ordered the seconds.

Vein popped out at the guys head. "What game are you talking about you damn glutton beast? Did you actually forget what happened in the past?"

"Nope." She finished her last bowl and stood up. "I do remember what happened, but I wanna take revenge Sadistic bastard and I will. Thanks old man." Thanking the vendor she turned away preparing to leave. "As long as those two are the once taking care of Aoi, there is no way in hell you can even get close to her."

He rose grabbing her hand but she shook it away. "Where do you think you're going?"

"I have a date. Maybe in the future everyone knows about my marriage with a scary person, but here I'm just a traveler. So good luck with Aoi and bye-bye!" Girl shakes her hand smiling and left.

Man gripped his chopstick breaking them in half and his blood boiling with demonic aura he shouted. "CHINA!"

 

* * *

 

Yorozuya HQ….

Achoo….

"Ah, Kagura-chan did you catch a cold?" Shinpachi asked with worried voice as he was already at the door leaving.

"Don't worry Patsuan, idiots don't catch colds." Gin said with bored voice not even looking up from his book.

Kagura glared at him, but before she could come up with a comeback Aoi grabbed the perm head's hair and started pulling. Gintoki screamed from pain making both Megane and Kagura laugh. He was running round and round inside the Yorozuya while Aoi was still sitting on the couch and playing with a handful of hair that she took out from Gin-chan's head.

"I'm leaving, see you tomorrow. Oh and Kagura-chan, Aoi-chan is still a baby, so she should sleep early." Megane explained as he left.

She let Aoi play with the older yorozuya for a while, which made Gin in pain since no matter how much angry he got he couldn't bring himself to shout at a brat who was so cutely laughing and soon he ended up with half bald hair. Smiling Kagura picked up Aoi. "Okay, now Aoi-chan time to go to bed."

As she said that Aoi started crying her lungs out as if you just took away her candy or hurt her.


	3. When you meet someone who claims to be your wife, check out her breast size to be sure you like it or be killed.

After blowing up another person who was indeed that night flirting with his wife, the man in red coat stepped out of the cloud of dust holding a huge bazooka and anger marks all over his deadpanned expression.

Since last night he has been following that China girl into every club and bar she went. It was indeed as she said since no one knew who she was, for all those bastards she was just a hot stranger and like hell he would let anyone touch his woman. Sleepless, pissed and jel- I mean angry, the man spend almost the whole night blowing up or scaring to death every person who dared to be close to her and flirt, as for the people who dared to touch her… That's censored information…. Scary to look at….

Finally he lost sight of her, that damn China run off somewhere while he was dealing with the host from the last club. Deciding to leave it at that and find her later, Sadist made his way towards Gengai's shop. He had to find a way to return to the future first and the grab his two girls and get out before anything were to happen. Sadist sigh, he hated it, especially this past.

Entering the shop he spotted Gengai, that damn old man who always managed to get them into trouble even in the future and Tama, green haired robot girl with maid uniform who works at Snack Otose. Sadist shook his head he doesn't want to even think about who Tama is with or what she is doing in the future.

Stepping in his shadow covered both of them and the said above people turned towards him. "Oi, old man, fix this remote or whatever and send me back." Sadist shouted throwing the remote at the man.

Gengai catch it then looked at the man. "Who are you? And fix your own things."

"I would if I could, damn piece of junk!" Man almost shouted, anger mark appearing but his deadpanned expression so much as twitching a little. "My name is Sougo Okita, I came from the future using that and your damn time machine so fix them and send me back." He said calmly as if those words explained everything.

Tama was the one who talked first. "You can't be Okita-sama, he is still a brat, super S who doesn't know anything, but to try to kill people and enjoy sadistic ways. He is always slacking off never taking anything seriously, he is acting cool but he is actually a little brat who is lost after his sister's death-"

Tama was about to continue when a katana was placed against her neck. Older Sougo talked expressionless voice as always. "If you don't wanna be ridden with viruses in the future, green piece of trash, then I success you to shut your trap."

She looked at him and added. "But he is a bishounen and a really kind hearted person whom everyone fears, he will definitely become a vice-commander in the future."

Lowering his sword the older man smirked. Then he looked at Gengai and the man was examining the remote and talked. "So this is the piece from time machine? Hahaha… I'm really great making something so amazing…" Old man laughed proudly.

"Don't be so full of yourself, dumbass. Since you made that, it only causes trouble. First you send everyone traveling in time, then when we returned and destroyed that damn thing you rebuild it and send my wife with daughter to this time."

"So, Okita-sama is married?" Tama asked in her usual robot like voice.

Okita scratched his head. "Yeah, to that China girl living with Danna, Kagura, and just try to comment on that I'll slice you in two." He added glaring at both past people.

Tama looked at him and broke the silence. "Everyone knew that this gonna happen, you two are well together."

Damn, that what everyone told him in the future too, oh well; he will deal with them later when the time comes. Sougo turned around to look at Gengai, spotting the man in the far corned crying while reading something.

Gengai was mumbling while reading the letter that fell from the remote. "So amazing, so all this gonna happen. Genius I really am a genius. So sweet of me, I should reply…"

Anger mark appearing Sougo shouted. "Why are you writing a letter to yourself?! Is this some kind of twisted in the head love drama! Stop that nonsense and fix that damn thing!"

"Well, instructions are here…" He shows Okita the piece of paper. "But I need some time to do this. Go try to kill someone while I am at it. Shoo-shoo." He waved his hand as if sending away a dog but pulled his hand just in time when a katana swing down at him.

"Fix it as soon as possible, grumpy bastard." While he's at it I'll go and find both China's and kill one of them. Then I'll take Aoi back. He thought turning away to leave.

"Oi, wait!" Gengai shouted making the older sadist turn around. "Be careful as to not reveal too much about the future. Big changes can cause a future to disappear and then there is a time paradox that will swallow everyone and-"

Gengai didn't get to finish as he saw Sougo walking out waving his hand and saying deadpanned. "I know I almost died from it."

 

* * *

 

Barber shop.

Gin was smiling with his usual grin on as he was playing with Hijikata's curly hair, pulling the ends of the curls and letting go making them bounce. Now that Toushi was curly head too, the two samurai looked totally identical with only their hair color different.

Seeing Hijikata's annoyance silver samurai kept playing with his hair annoying the mayora even more. "It's really curly you know… really bouncy…"

"STOP THAT YOU DAMN YOROZUYA-MADAO-BASTARD! I'LL KILL YOU!" Hijikata shouted jumping from his seat that was near Gintoki's and glaring at the guy.

"Oi, Oogushi-kun, did you do this on purpose? Do you like my hair that much?"

"Who will like it, perm head idiot?" Toushi shouted vein popping on his face.

Gin smirked. "Eh? Are you sure that you should call me that? You have a perm too now you know?" He pulled Hijikata's curls again, making the vice-commander jump away. "But two character with perm head in the same manga, is really troublesome. Go bald Mayora!" He stated looking at the other man with dead fish like eyes.

"You're pissing me off to no end yorozuya! I'll cut that useless head of yours." Hijikata grabbed his sword.

"Eh~ Your actions are not matching your looks Hijikata-kuuun~" He said mockingly with troll smile. "You wanna look like me? You like me that much? Are in love with me?"

"DIE YOU DAMN DUMBASS!" Hijikata jumped at the guy swinging his sword, but Gin just jumped away keeping his troll smile mockingly. Damn that Sougo! I'll kill that king sadist! I'll definitely murder him! Toushi thought annoyed as he was swinging his sword at yorozuya, but has to stop when barber came in and shouted.

FLASHBACK.

It was like any other morning, Hijikata woke up earlier than anyone as always and found his way to bathroom still wearing his black yukata. After finishing his business he returned to his room to dress up in his complicated Shinsengumi uniform. During all that period he didn't even once looked at the mirror, Toushi thought it was stupid and unnecessary, since he was not some girl, to look at himself in the mirror all the time.

By the time he was already dressed and out everyone was up, but for some reason as he walked down the yard towards the meeting room where he has to check the daily duties with Kondo-san, everyone was staring at him weirdly as if he grew a third eye on his forehead. He stopped abruptly rubbing his forehead with his hand to check if that bastard Sougo wrote something on his face, but there was nothing.

He entered the meeting room, where Okita and Kondo were waiting and sat in front of them taking the papers and reading them. He heard snorts and looking up he spotted Gori looking at him in shock and confusion while Sougo was smirking not even trying to hide it.

"What's wrong? What's so funny?" He glared at the two.

"Um, Toushi is that a new fashion or did you and yorozuya guy changed places?" Kondo asked puzzled with uncertain voice.

"What are you saying? Of course not, who would ever want to change with that damn useless bum." Toushi said lighting his cigarette anger mark on his forehead.

Kondo shook sweat running down his face, as he realized what would demon vice-commander do. "T-Toushi, y-y-your hair…. It's bouncing…"

"Huh~?" Hijikata exclaimed. "Kondo-san, did that gorilla woman hit you that hard? There is nothing wrong with my-"

He couldn't get to finish as Sougo took out the big mirror and placed it in front of the demon vice-commander. Looking down in it, his eyes started to twitch as he realized that his hair was curly. It was still black which differentiated him from yorozuya, but he was not himself anymore… HE WAS A DAMN PERM HEAD NOW! Toushi shouted in his thoughts.

"W-well, it's not so bad Toushi. Image change works for everyone and it suits you." Kondo was desperately trying to calm the rising hellish aura of second in charge, as he was uncomfortably smiling not believing his own words.

"No, Kondo-san, danna and Hijibaka-san are already so close that they can't live without each other, so they're using the matching looks couple team." Sougo said deadpanned expression, but with mockery in his voice and slight smirk at the end.

"Matching looks couple team" NOT!" Toushi jumped forwards grabbing Sougo by his collar and glaring at him with kill intend and veins popping out. "Sougo teme! This is all your doing isn't it? You did it didn't you?"

Sougo raised his hands as if surrendering. "What are you saying Hijikata-san, I have 'nothing' to do with it. Kondo-san you see, how can you allow a perm head violent guy be a vice-commander. Let's kill him!" Okita comments bored expression on, only smiling slightly when Hijikata got even more pissed and pulled him closer then threw him to the floor lighting another cigarette trying to calm his nerves.

Hijikata touched his hair feeling how the shape has changed, his straight hair was now curly at the ends, looking at the mirror he got even more pissed since now he looked exactly like natural-perm-idiot-yorozuya. His eye twitched while his own hand grabbed his hair and started to pull.

Kondo was still sweating trying to calm him down. "Well now Toushi, it's not such a big deal you know. Just take a shower I think it'll go away after that, right Sougo?" Gorilla turned desperate eyes towards the sadistic captain hopping for him to back him up.

But Sougo only made an innocent face shrugging. "Sorry Kondo-san, I think I 'accidentally' added some super glue in Hijibaka-san's shampoo."

Blue lines went down in Gori's face as he felt chills all over him. He looked at the mayora beside him to see that he was standing hand on his katana and demonic aura around him, eyes blazing with fury. "Sou-go…. YOU DAMN JACKASS SADIST! I'LL KILL YOU!"

Shouting Toushi unleashed his sword jumping at Sougo, but other man dodged and pointed his own sword out excited for a fight. He smirked as the other man charged again. "It's not so bad perm- oh I mean Hijikata-san~"

Toushi stopped gripping his sword tight. "You damn bastard, I look like a poodle now!"

Sougo grinned. "Nope you look like yorozuya no danna."

"THAT'S EVEN WORSE!" Toushi shouted and charged again, Kondo trying to stop them somehow from the side.

END OF FLASHBACK.

"Oh, so Souchirou-kun is behind this, huh?" Gintoki commented nodding like a philosopher scratching his chin.

Hijikata clenched his teeth biting on his cigarette eye twitching. "Don't look into other people's flashbacks, yorozuya idiot!" He shouted coming head to head with Gintoki.

"Huh~" Vein popped on Gin's face pushing his forehead against the other black perm head. "Then don't go off having flashback in the middle of the fight, Bouncy-kun."

"DON'T CALL ME THAT!" He wanted to grab his sword, but was stopped by barber.

"Um, I'm sorry, but your hair can't be fixed, Bouncy-kun." Barber said.

Vein popped on Bo-Toushi's forehead and he shouted looking at the barber through the mirror from where he was sitting. "STOP WITH THAT NAME!"

Toushi looked around to see countless broken combs, finished shampoo and all the other things that were used on his head to fix him hair, but it was in vain.

"Give it up, Bouncy-kun. I haven't been able to fix my hair my whole life." Gintoki patted Hijikata's shoulder with sympathy.

Vice-commander shoves away his hand pissed. "I'm not you, yorozuya. I don't want to be called perm head devil vice-commander my entire life."

"Well, then sir…" Barber interrupted them. "I can shave you bald and you will have your original hair grow in two-three episodes, if you're lucky enough to not show up during those episodes."

Toushi stared into empty space imagining himself bald going around Edo and commanding inside barracks while being bald devil vice-commander. He imagined Sougo having sadistic smile and Kondo showing him sympathy, while officers laugh behind his back. For the first time in his whole life he admitted, not that he will let anyone know or hear about it, but he admitted that being perm head is better than being bald with shining head.

Hijikata stood up from his seat moving to the door after paying. "Sorry, I'll pass."

As he exited the barbershop, yorozuya was close behind him. Gin put his hand on Toushi's shoulder saying while smirking. "Let's go Bouncy-kun. Let's drown our sorrows in sake."

"I SAID DON'T CALL ME THAT!" Toushi shouted, but still obeyed sighing and followed him to the bars.

While the two, now both with perm heads were moving away older Kagura exited the market that was near the barber. Older China was holding a plastic bag full of snacks and junk food, while with her other hand she was eating the sukobu. Older Kagura looked around hearing two familiar voices and recognized the two who were moving away from her. One of them was wearing a Shinsengumi uniform with black hair and the other one, was all too familiar to her person, with his white kimono that was off from one side and with white hair.

But what was interesting to her was that they both were curly head now. Kagura looked confused biting down the sukobu. "Ah, there are two Gin-chan's now." She said with low cute voice, but shrug and started to walk away the opposite way.

 

* * *

 

Yoshiwara.

"What a lovely girl. Seita seems to like her too." Hinowa commented with a smile as she watched Seita and Aoi play around. Seita was running away from Aoi as she was swinging her little umbrella, but then running from behind her and tickling.

"Where did you find that brat?" Tsukyo said smoking while relying on the wall and looking at the two brats playing.

Kagura smiled widely as she was eating from a big bowl. "She's my daughter and I'm taking care of her."

Hinowa and Tsukky looked at her confused. "Are you sure Kagura-chan? Doesn't she have a family, they must be looking for her, right?" Hinowa looked worried at the China girl.

Kagura shook her head helping herself to another bowl of food. "Nope, her mother left her to sadistic bastard, but since I can't leave an innocent baby to king of planet sadists I took her for myself." Kagura smiled satisfied by her conclusion.

Tsukky looked at Aoi, as the little girl finally got annoyed with Seita's teasing and swinging her umbrella tripped him then tried to smash his head, but he run away in time. This time she was running after him for real trying to hit him with all her might, pouting and little anger marks on. "It seems she is sadistic enough." Tsukky breathed out the smoke watching as the smoke slowly fade away.

Kagura was still smiling satisfied after her tenth bowl and sitting back on the bench relaxing. "This is heaven…"

"I finally found you." A familiar voice called, but it was deeper that usual. "Well, considering all the places and people you know it's not so hard. Since if you're not with Otae nee-san then you're in Yoshiwara."

Kagura turned towards the voice as she recognized the man from yesterday standing not far away from them expressionless and hands in his pockets. Now that she wasn't angry and examined his face better, he looked familiar, this guy looked like her rival, but older version.

Kagura jumped up angry pointing her gun at the guy. "What do you want pervert-pedoro?!"

Anger mark appeared on his forehead and he shouted. "STOP WITH THE NAMES! You damn bastard, she is my daughter, and I don't have weird fetishes!"

She spit giving him the disgusted look. "Don't give me that crap. She doesn't know you and she was scared."

"I wasn't home for a long time. Besides you know who I am right? I'm Sougo Okita, your rival, but from future. Of course you're not that dumb right China?" He smirked.

She frowned getting even more pissed. "You're pissing me off! There is no way that disgusting Sadist will look like this when he grows up."

"And I wouldn't have ever believed that you would look, like you do in the future, when right now you're a tomboy annoying glutton."

She shoots from her parasol making him jumped away and unleash his sword. "Damn you China monster, listen to me first!"

"Like hell dumbass, you're not taking Aoi away!" She jumped at him attacking and he dodged. Surprising enough he knew all her attacks and was fighting her easily. At realization she got even more annoyed.

She kept hitting and he returned the attacks. She stopped half way glaring at the man as he was smirking. "What tomboy brat, ready to give in?"

"As if!" She charged, but he maneuvered behind her blocking her umbrella with his sheath while putting his sword at her throat. "Bastard I'll kill you!"

"You'll have plenty of time to try that, but first listen to me-" He whispered to her ear.

"First let her go." Kunai was placed against his neck, older sadist didn't have to look back to know that Tsukky and probably few other females from her team have gathered around.

It was always like this after all as soon they fight there have to be an audience. He let go of his wife's little self and she jumped away from him glaring. Kagura hit him in the stomach making him double over. "You freaking female gorilla's no wonder you don't have any man."

This time there was a kunai in his forehead. He took it out glaring at the woman who threw it and threw the kunai away. All this females was nothing to him, he could fight them and even do more than that since he's a sadist, he smirked realizing what kind of games he could actually play and he would have succeeded in pissing the older China off since she hated it when he was in Yoshiwara and around other woman.

But he didn't have time for that; Aoi was still in the hands of a little glutton idiot who has no idea what she's doing and the older beast that also doesn't know what she's doing is walking around, he has to find her and hopefully return before that time. He sighs, looking at the younger Kagura, what in the world did he find in this girl 5 years ago, to fall in love and marry her?

Finally putting his sword away he moved his hands up to untie his cravat and then unbuttoned four buttons on his shirt.

Kagura's eyes went wide and she blushed moving away. "Oi, what the hell are you doing? This might be that kind of place, but don't undress in the middle of the street pervert!"

"What are you planning?" Tsukky also blushing prepared to throw five more kunai at him.

He opened his shirt half way exposing his upper chest and revealing a silver colored pretty necklace with a rose engraved on it, while his crimson eyes were staring at China making her uncomfortable. "Is this proof enough, idiot?"

Kagura shook her head concentrating on the necklace trying to forget the older supposed sadists stare. She recognized the familiar shape, the same rose that was one her mothers golden necklace that she took with herself when she left home, but it was silver in color the same one her father had with him until her baka-nii took it away.

"Where did you get that Bakaiser?" She asked again pointing her umbrella at him this time with serious face. That necklace was something that belonged to her family no one but her and Kamui should have such a thing.

"Are you dumb? There are only two ways for me to get it, either to be a Yato or be married to a part of your family. Since I'm not a Yato classman-"

"So you're in a relationship with baka-nii. Che, I didn't know you had such interests Sadist." She showed him disgusted face.

"OF COURSE NOT YOU PIG YOUKAI!" Older Okita shouted, but then calmed down.

"You gave it to me, or more like we made a copy of yours so that they would look identical." He sighs scratching his neck. "I told you China, I came from the future and well there we're… Married." He said the last word dragged out while enjoying the horrified look on China's face as it slowly turned into blush.

"YOU'RE LYING!" She shouted swinging her parasol, but he dodged as always, it was easy since after all this years he knew exactly where she is gonna hit. "Hell will freeze over before I even think about marrying a prince of planet sadist! You're making me sick. Die, go and die!"

He smirked. "You said that at first too China, but then after we did XXX and you were XXX, while I was XXX. You kept telling me how you loved it and then we XXX-"

"STOP~!" She shouted all red like a tomato till her ears while sitting down and holding her head. "Waaa~ I'm gonna be traumatized. Gin-chan kill this bastard, he is gonna ruing my innocent mind!" She kept screaming.

"No, I don't think that it can actually become more messed up that now." Older Sadist said deadpanned enjoying his little torture over China, not like he was lying though.

"Kagura-chan…" Hinowa was near her now; China raised her face eyes teary and snot running, while her face was still burning red and she was not the only one Tsukky, who was standing behind Hinowa, she realized was also red, even redder than Kagura. "I think you should really listen to this man. Maybe he has something important to tell you since he came such a long way."

She looked at the older female who was smiling at her. "Don't worry, Tsukky and I will look after Aoi." Hinowa added.

Kagura nodded and stood up, wiping her face with Sadist's coat as she approached him earning a stare from him with annoyed eyes. Then she raised her head glaring at the man, he azure eyes locked to his crimson once that were reflecting her. "I'm listening, but if I don't believe you, you're dead, pedo-sadist."

Anger mark appeared on his forehead as older Okita was trying his best to not snap and cut the tomboy in front of him, but god he loved when she was glaring at him with her sapphire eyes.

 

* * *

 

Shinsengumi HQ.

"So that's the story, now that you know will you help me with the revenge little Sadist-kun." Older China smiled at him.

Older Kagura came into the barracks a little while ago, making every single male around the HQ stare at her with open mouth. She enjoyed their reaction, not like she didn't have any admirers in the future, but since she was married to the worlds most scariest King of Planet of Sadist, number one Bakaiser, everyone was so scared that they kept their distance stealing little glances at her, but not daring to gape. She smiled, but right now it was different, for all this Shinsengumi idiots she was just a super good-looking girl from somewhere and she had no connection what-so-ever with the current Sougo Okita.

Finally finding the little Sadist, who was as always sleeping with his stupid mask on under the tree, she approached him having him looked at her surprised. He seemed to recognize her, since they were rivals she guessed, but he still kept his emotionless face as he listened to her story bored.

"What's my profit from it?" Sougo asked with deadpanned voice.

She smirked. "Well, you like playing games right and I know you will enjoy this. Besides, as a reward for helping me I'll tell you Hijibaka's most embarrassing secret, that will appear only in couple of years, so that you can start blackmailing him now."

That seemed to catch his attention since he sat closer his eyes firing with interest and grin on his lips. "So I have an upper hand over Hijibaka?"

Kagura nodded. "Yeah, you might even become a vice-commander with that secret." She kept smiling, but inside shaking her head on how it was easy to bribe and get males in this manga do everything that's asked, just give them, sweets, money, mayonnaise or a chance to become a vice-commander.

Suddenly she felt a funny sensation her breast, Older China looked down to see little Sadist's hand squeezing her left breast while with other hand he kept rubbing his chin. "To think that China will grow to actually look hot, I've underestimated you tomboy."

Anger marks appeared all over older Kagura as she started to shake with fury rising. "You damn perverted…." She picked up her parasol. "MOLESTING JACKASS!"

Kagura shouted and swing her umbrella at Sadist with all her might. He jumped away-satisfied smirk on his face while unsheathing his sword.

They started to fight, it seems like no matter what time or age they're at it will always be China and Sadist fighting. Be it kicking, punching or cutting and shooting they did all that and as it looked from the outside they seemed to do it all at the same time. In a minute the whole room was in ruins and broken down.

Suddenly the door opened and the other two walked in. "Sadist listen to this…" Kagura put down Aoi on tatami saying, but before she could finish she spotted her older self and Sadist. Older Sougo entered right behind her and also froze besides her looking at his younger self.

Older Kagura and younger Sadist were lying in a really compromising position that made their other selves grab their weapons tighter. Older China was above Sadist her one leg between his thighs, her one hand pinning his hand down and with the other hand she was pointing her umbrella at his head, while Okita was lying under her one hand pinned down and with the other one he was holding her breast.

"Oh China, I see you've already met 'us'." Younger Sadist said expressionless while not thinking of moving away.

"What are you doing, bastard?" Younger Kagura asked gritting her teeth in anger.

Older China smiled. "We're… wrestling."

The aura of the two that walked in have been rising turning black in color, and they were now reminding of two demons. "Little Sougo-kun, why are you under my woman and touching her breast?" Older Sadist asked starting to unsheathe his sword.

"Just checking what size will my future wife have." Younger Okita answered.

Suddenly the monstrous aura filled the air. Older Sadist and younger Kagura glaring at their past and future selves, their aura now turning into the full black and their eyes blazing red with fury.

Whole barracks were emptied as soon as the shinsengumi officers felt the kill intend in the air. Aoi on the other hand was happy with the situation not minding her surrounding she was happily playing with the little voodoo doll that probably belonged to Sadist.

As if to add to their tension, younger Sougo squeezed older China's breast making her go "Ah~" With cute voice and blush on her cheeks.

CRACK.

Many cracking sounds were heard in the air and then silence.

"Sadist…" Younger Kagura said at the same time as Older Sadist said. "Little Sougo…"

"YOU'RE DEAD!" The two shouted in unison.

To be continued….


	4. Don't spoil your children too much or you might end up in trouble

Yamazaki sat in front of his laptop typing. "Yesterday as the officers felt the evil once again rising in the barracks, everyone left. We ran for our lives fearing the wrath of two-no now four most feared people. The fight have been going on for the night, subsiding for few minutes fooling us into feeling relieved, but then starting again. We've watched, as Shinsengumi HQ slowly turned into ruins, no one daring to enter or stop the fight. We're waiting, waiting in fear for it to end… We need a hero, we need…"

Vein popping on his face, Hijikata slammed Jimmy's face into his laptop, crashing the device with the power of the impact. "Stop with that useless crap, Zaki! This not an useless ****wood movie of zombies!" Devil-commander shouted gripping his teeth around his cigarette.

Anpan boy raised his head, two keyboard buttons replacing his eyes and he spit out the rest from his mouth. Finally shaking his head and freeing his face from the keyboard he looked shocked at Toushi.

"Vice-commander!" Zaki shouted with happiness his eyes filling with tears.

Mayora clicked his tongue with irritation. "What's with the stupid face Zaki? It looks even more disgusting than before."

Yamazaki started crying with pleading eyes looking at Hijikata. "Vice-chief, I'm so glad you're here. Please save us!"

"Huh?" Toushi put out his cigarette glaring at the officer.

"TOUSHI!" Huge Gorilla with teary eyes and snot running down his nose jumped at the vice-commander, kneeling down and clinging to his uniform jacket with pleading eyes. "Toushi, you're finally here. Save us, Toushi!"

"Gori- *Ahem* Kondo-san what are you doing?" Hijikata stared at his friend then when instead of answering; overgrown Gorilla kept crying and dirty vice-commander's uniform with his snot.

Mayo-freak turned his gaze to Yamazaki, glaring at the younger guy. "Oi, Jimmy what in the name of the mayonnaise is going on in here?"

2 minutes later….

"Now because of them we can't enter the barracks. You're the only one who can stop them Toushi." Kondo cried.

Hijikata lit a new cigarette with irritation. Great timing. He is pissed like hell since yesterday, ended up not having much sleep and now this. Oh, well he might as well go off and vent his frustration on those brats.

"Geez, what kind of useless adults are you that you can't even deal with little brats and their overgrown selves." Putting his hands in his pockets Toushi walked towards the gates to the HQ.

Kondo stared after him with hopeful and shining eyes waving him, mouthing 'good luck'. After a second Yamazaki narrowed his eyes, concentrating on vice-chief's head. His hair was curly and it was bouncing as he walked, but that was not what surprised him since he already knew what happened yesterday. Yet, now Shinsengumi devil vice-commander was not only a perm head, but also his hair color was silver. Yes, exactly Silver hair, silver perm head, just like Yorozuya no danna.

Yamazaki whispered to his commander's ear that he just figured out, since a while ago he was too busy thinking of the outcome of that fight. Commander also seemed to notice the changes, after he whipped his tears and made a serious expression.

Zaki was still not able to mutter any words, when Gori talked. "Toushi, your hair… Um… What-?"

Before commander could finish, Mayora stopped on his track and glared at the two men from the corner if his eye, emitting devilish aura that obviously read 'I'll-freaking-murder-anyone-who-gets-close-to-me. ' Turning away he slowly started walking.

"If any of you dare to comment on my hair, you'll all commit seppuku, right on the spot!"

At those words, both Kondo and Yamazaki swallowed what they were trying to say and pretended to not notice anything.

Damn that sadistic king, damn that yorozuya good-for-nothing-ass, damn those raised-by-gorillas-amazons. Doing this to him... I'll murder them, next time I'll definitely cut them and then while killing them slowly I'll feast on their suffering. Toushi was thinking hands in his pockets, evil aura around him, vein popping on his face as he entered the barracks.

 

* * *

 

Half of the barracks if not all of them are destroyed, but fight was still far from over. They were so engrossed in it that they already didn't care who they were fighting. First it was Sougo vs. Kagura, Bakaiser vs. Queen, but then at some point it turned into the brawl between two China's or between Queen and Sougo or the other way around.

After fighting for the night of course they are exhausted, but neither of them wanted to back down. The four wanted to start another round when someone grabbed Bakaiser and Kagura by the back of their heads and slammed them together. Making the two, scream in agony, as they moved back, holding their heads, their other selves stopped as well wanting to see what was happening.

"Geez Danna, what's your problem?" Bakaiser looked up at the man and froze.

"Gin-chan, what was that-for?" Kagura also cut down her words.

Looking bored and uninterested Sougo approached the trio with Older Kagura by his side. "Oi Hijikata-san, what's with that hair color? Are you cosplaying Danna?"

"Shut the fuck up you dumbass. This is all your fault!" Toushi shouted with anger marks all over his face.

Queen gave him sideways looks. "What did you do?"

Sougo shrug. "Just a little accident with the glue, but I like the idea with the color. Che, missed that one."

Hijikata took out his sword. "I'll cut you useless Sadistic bastard! Look what you did to the HQ!"

Four heads and eight eyes turned around taking in their handy work. Kagura spit on the side with disgusting face. "I know you tax-robbers are worst than homeless in sewers keeping such dirty barracks, but you could at least sometimes clean."

"This is all your fault, you pain in the ass Sadistic quartet." Toushi shouted.

Ignoring him absolutely, both Kagura's together with their two partners, with the same deadpanned faces, moved towards Sougo's room, the only place that seemed to not being damaged. On the way Queen picked up Aoi, smiling and playing with her as she entered the room.

The room filled with tension and heavy aura as the four sat across from each other each of them glaring at their partner.

"I see you're pretty friendly with Bakaiser." Sougo asked with bored expression looking at China.

Kagura glared back. "Not as friendly as you are with Deva."

"What were you two doing earlier?" Bakaiser looked at his wife, who was playing with Aoi ignoring his presence.

"I told you we were wrestling, it's not the first time, you bastard!" Deva gave her husband sideways glance then returned her attention towards the little girl on her lap, playing with her hair.

King of Sadists hit the table with his fists his tension rising. "What kind of wrestling involves groping other person's breast, you pig youkai!"

"What did you call me, you useless piece of junk?" Older China put Aoi down glaring at her husband her hand gripping his collar.

"Don't tell me you like me that much, Sadist. Did you fall in love with me? Che, disgusting." Kagura showed disgusted face spitting at the side.

Sougo looked at her through half closed eyes. "I think it's you whose head over heels in love with me China, since you married me as soon as I asked."

"THAT'S NOT TRUE!" Both China's shouted. Kagura put her leg on the table-grabbing Sadist by his collar pulling him close. "Why are you hiding your feelings? Are you a shy person? Come on, spit it out Souichirou, it's obvious."

"Sougo desu~ China, don't go off assuming that I'll ever like a brat with half-developed brain. You're not my type, glutton monkey." He smirked.

Okita Kagura smiled at her husband. "Well, even though you say that, you were almost begging me to marry you…" When her husband hissed with anger she continued. "I mean coming all the way here, being worried and getting jealous even of your own younger self for touching me. Admit it Bakaiser, you're crazy for me. Lo-ser!" She finished with troll smile.

"In your dreams China beast!"

The four of them gabbed their weapons once more. Preparing to attack when high-pitched cry broke the silence. Letting go of each other they closed their ears looking at the source of the voice that was Aoi. Both Okita's didn't do much, but to sit back on their places and put on their usual trademark deadpanned expressions.

"What's wrong Aoi-chan?" China asked almost shouting so will be heard through the cries.

"Mami and Papi hate each other~" Shouting that Aoi kept crying her lungs out.

"No, no, no Aoi-chan calm down. It's not like that." Queen slide closer gently brushing her daughter's hair.

China was also sitting in front of Aoi trying her best to make her stop. "That's right, Aoi we don't hate each other."

"Don't lie to the kid." Sougo said.

Both women glared at him shouting. "Shut the fuck up Sadist, or I'll slice that sorry ass of yours in two."

Kagura then turned to Aoi also patting her head. "Look Aoi, Mami and Papi are in love. We're really~ in love!"

"Really?" She asked with cute voice looking through the tears. "Then prove it."

"Eh? Proof? How?" China asked a little confused.

"Like you always prove to Aoi that you love her." Aoi mumbled.

At that Deva gulped looking concerned, China turned her attention at her older self with puzzled look. Older woman sigh. "When Aoi asked me if I love her, I kiss her to prove my love, same does this Sadistic Bakaiser behind me." She pointed with her thumb towards her husband.

At that younger Yato female's eyes went wide making her jumped up slightly blushing. "There is no way in hell am I k-k-k-kissing that bastard!"

Hearing that Aoi cried again making all four of them close their ears from the high-pitched voice she was making. Kagura sat down giving the little girl a desperate look. "Okay, fine. I'll give you a proof."

At that Aoi stopped and China turned towards Sougo making him give her a questioning look with a raised brow. "Oi, China what are you-"

But before he could finish his sentence she grabbed his collar puling him towards her self and closed the distance between their lips, kissing him. It was quick and rough kiss, but it was a kiss. They broke apart a second later Kagura sitting few feet away from him, her face turned towards the other side. Sougo's eyes were wide opened and there was just a little blush on his face, but it quickly disappeared his face turning emotionless.

"Oh, so this is your way of confessing your undying love to me China? It was sour, disgusting." Sadist said mockingly as he put his arms behind his head and relied to the wall.

"Shut up, you fucking pervert!" She rose up, her back facing the trio, so that they couldn't see her face. "I… I just remembered… I promised Gin-chan, to do something… somewhere with someone… So… Good-bye!" She shouted and run away from the room making Aoi stare after her with questionable look.

"Oh, I was such a cutie!" Deva said with shining eyes admiring her self.

"Yeah, too bad you don't have it anymore?" Bakaiser deadpanned with mocking voice.

Kagura turned around to glare at him and then give a quick kiss to her daughter and stood up approaching the door with a smirk. "Take care of Aoi for me, Sadist-kun. I have a date tonight, so I will be back late." She waved her hand as farewell and left.

Older Okita rose to his feet clenching his katana with one hand and dark shadows over him, his bangs hiding his eyes. "Just let her play with Mayora, she enjoys trying to kill him."

Sougo looked up not moving from his place. "I'm not a babysitter. Take your brat with you if you're leaving, useless father."

Bakaiser turned around a smile on his face, the same smile that Kamui wears every time while fighting or intending to kill someone. "Sorry, can't let her be traumatized by the things I'll be doing to her mother." And he left after his wife, leaving Sougo and Aoi alone.

Sadist looked at the little girl. "It looks like it's just you and me, brat. I'm going to sleep, so go on and kill Hijibaka, he's already pissed, so annoy him even more." Aoi smiled at him turning her head towards the sliding door that connected Toushi and Sougo's room.

Okita relied his head back on the wall closing his eyes. Damn you China; if you're going to kiss someone, at least don't bite his lips. That kiss… He touched his lips with his two fingers outlining the surface. It tasted like blood… and sukobu.

 

* * *

 

That night. Yorozuya.

Kagura was peacefully sleeping in her closet, feeling happy and relieved. She was so stupid in going along with Aoi's selfishness and kissing that bastard… And why in the world is the kiss tasted like blood. When they kiss in drama's people always go blushing and happy, but for her it wasn't sugar sweet, instead it had a metallic taste to it. Yet, she kind of liked the feeling of their lips touching, even if it was for a second she felt butterflies in her stomach, making her wonder when she ever eat butterflies.

Suddenly her phone rang; she turned in her place having the urge to crash the phone. It kept on ringing and ringing, feeling frustrated she picked up the damn thing and shouted.

"What do you want jackass? Do you have a death wish? I'll kill you whomever you are…"

"China." Voice as irritated as her own called to her.

Her heart skipped a beat all of a sudden making her fully awake. Wait, why would her heart skip a beat? "Sadist, why do you have my number? Are you stalking me?"

"Shut up, blockhead. This brat won't stop crying so come and pick her up."

Suddenly she could hear Aoi's high-pitched cry. She frowned. "Man up Sadist. You bunch of tax robber can't even take care of a little kid. No wonder there is so many bad guys all around the Edo." She complained closing her phone and going back to sleep.

It rang again in a second making her snap it open once more. "What?" She shouted with irritation.

"Come and stop her or I'll throw her out. She's interfering with my beauty-sleep."

"You won't dare. Touch her and I'll kill you for sure or better you will kill yourself." She replied closing the phone only to open it again second later. "WHAT?"

"If you think that my Sadistic ways won't work on a kid, then you're underestimating me China." She could feel him grin on the other line. "If you're not here in 5 minutes, then you will have only yourself to blame."

Vein popped out on her face. "How do you expect me to sneak in the tax robbers hideout in the middle of the night?"

"Not my problem." He said and this time it was Sougo who snapped the phone close.

She clenched her fists wanting to crash something and it would have been great if she could crash that Sadistic Captain's head. Not bothering to change from her pink pajamas, Kagura slowly exited her 'room' and sneaked out not making too much noise, so that her silver hair guardian won't wake up.

 

* * *

 

Shinsengumi HQ.

Stomping her feet on the wooden veranda not bothering with the noise since Aoi's cry was much louder than anything she could ever do. Slamming open the door to Sadist's room, she almost flew away by the hit of the voice vacuum that gotten loose.

Entering the room not bothering with the door, she quickly picked Aoi up and embraced her gently whispering something to her ear. Feeling her young mother's warmth little girl stopped crying leaning on Kagura's chest and snuggling while her hands grabbed China's top.

While still holding her future daughter Kagura glared at Sougo. "Oi, Sadist, are you dumb or something. All she wanted was food she is hungry. Can't you even understand that?"

Sougo didn't answer, instead pulling out the cottons that he stuffed in his ears. Kagura hissed at him. "Go and bring some milk or she will cry again."

He arched a brow with mocking voice. "Aren't woman supposed to give milk with their breast? Or are yours so small that they deformed to male."

"Do you want to die, bastard?" She glared at him clearly kill intend on her expression.

Sougo scratched his head, he would have enjoyed fighting her, it was fun teasing her, but… 1. It was middle of the night. 2. He was sleep deprived and he wanted so much to rest. 3. If this brat starts crying again someone if definitely going to go nuts and someone else become headless.

"Damn you, causing so much trouble." He turned around closing the door behind him as he left towards the kitchen. "Damn it, where is Zaki when we need him? I could send him to do the shopping and run around the city 30 laps naked. That could ease my frustration."

After they finally feed the little kid, Aoi almost instantly fall asleep. Kagura put her inside Sadist's futon getting in and snuggling with her. Sougo looked down at two new occupants of his bed and frowned.

"What the hell are you doing, China? Want me to cut you in your sleep?"

Kagura yawned closing her eyes. "I don't care what you think Sadist, but do something funny and you're dead the next morning. Besides I'm too tired and sleepy to go back to yorozuya and Aoi might start to cry again."

Okita looked at them a minute, but then smirked and lie down together with them, Aoi sleeping in between the two. Pulling the futon over all three of them and smirking popping his head on his arm.

"Ne, China, do want to play family with me that much?" He teased, but she didn't answer. At that he started poking her cheek to make sure if she was sleeping or pretending. "China *poke* China *poke* China." She is pretty soft for a monster and such smooth skin.

He relied his head back at the pillow looking at the ceiling then back at the vermilion haired girl near him. Kagura was sleeping peacefully her guard down, her chest slowly rising and falling with each breath. She looked so innocent, so…. Cute. No one can guess that this girl has a mouth full of trash despise her age.

"Damn you, China, don't let your guard down in front of your rival, idiot. You trust me to much, I am the Prince of Sadists, you know."

With evil grin he took out the black marker and got closer to her leaning over Aoi carefully as to not wake her up. He wanted to start drawing when his hands stopped. Sougo's eyes locked on her pink rosy lips, just this morning he felt their softness against himself. He actually like it, despise the weird taste of blood and sour sukobu he like the feeling of kissing China, even though at first he though that it will be disgusting.

I wonder how they taste like now. Sadist thought and before he knew it, Sougo was already closing his eyes locking his lips with Kagura's. Weird feeling filled his chest, as if this moment should have just stopped, he forgot where they were or what was going on, all he cared about that this was the first time he felt this way. He could only think about the softness of her lips, her unexpectedly sweet and somehow calming smell, and her taste, she was tasking a little sour, because of sukobu, but even that felt welcoming to him.

The kiss lasted only a second, with him quickly kissing her and moving away, ready for an attack if she suddenly woke up. But she didn't, instead she shifted slightly on her place mumbling in her sleep.

"S…Sadist…" She mumbled, Okita's eyes going wide with shock, she was talking in her sleep and it was about him. He grinned; this could be a perfect teasing material. "You… smell like…. Gin-chan's feet…"

With that he felt himself snap, anger marks were all over his head and he gripped tighter on his marker. It's time for revenge China. And he started drawing on her face, evil smile plastered on his face.

 

* * *

 

Kabuki-cho.

Deva stretch herself in the middle of the street as she exited the bar. She was fully aware that Bakaiser was following her and she enjoyed so much seeing him getting jealous and frustrated because of her. Damn bastard deserved it, after leaving her for two month and going on mission with Baka-nii + flirting with those bitches. He has yet to feel the wrath of Kabuki-cho's new generation Deva, one of the new four Deva's, Kagura Okita.

Kagura have to prove that overconfident dumbass bastard Bakaiser, that she too has tricks up her sleeves. She couldn't feel his presence anymore, meaning that he probably lost her again, oh well he will catch up. "So which bar or club I should visit next, somewhere with lots of cuties." She smiled thinking of a perfect place. Sougo will be so pissed when he finds her there.

She was about to move when she felt a gun pointing and her back. She didn't move or looked back, Kagura simply tightened her grip on her parasol. "You are an idiot to pick a fight with a Yato class man. Bullets won't work on me and you will lie dead in a second if you shoot, so scram boy." She said with a low serious voice.

Man behind her didn't even flinch he just close the distance between them whispering to her ear. "These are special bullets, they will get into your blood and then your heart will stop just like it did before. You know what I mean, don't you Okita Kagura?"

Kagura gritted her teeth in frustration. "Che, so that man is already here. Not surprised, that damn old fox, I should have killed him before."

"He wants to see you, so be a good girl and come with us." Man said pushing her slightly with his gun.

She smirked. "What if I refuse?"

"Then I'll shoot you, I am ordered to bring you in even if you're on the verge of death. Oh, but you might not care and risk your life, right? I don't recommend you to do that, one wrong move and your daughter will be the one to get hurt. Your younger self can't protect her alone, she might also 'accidentally' get killed."

Kagura cursed under her breath, she can't let them near Aoi or their past selves, those guys have no idea about this bullets or this organization that has to appear only in two years, it's dangerous for them, all of them.

"Give me your parasol first." Man ordered and Kagura slowly passed him her umbrella. "No funny business!" Man shouted.

"I'm not doing funny business, you asshole! I'm loosening my scarf it's too hot." She gripped her scarf loosening it a little from around her neck also ripping something out in the process. Something falls on the ground with a little clank, but because of the busy town sounds, the man couldn't hear it.

"Now lets go and don't you dare to attract any unwanted attention, I'll shoot." He pushed Kagura to start both moving in an unknown direction.

To be continued...


	5. Never sleep in the same room with the Sadist, because you might never wake up or you won't like your alarm clock.

Kagura shifted under the futon realizing that she wasn't sleeping in a right position or more like she wasn't touching the ground. Opening her eyes she look up seeing the ceiling from close up, too close to her, she reached her hand and touched it suddenly her eyes going wide and she sit up loosing her balance and falling crashing down. She tried to stand up from the broken tatami, but something fell on her burying her under the floor.

She kicked breaking the closet that fell on her shouting "SADIST!" Kagura jumped up with the most pissed look ever and started looking around searching for her rival. Damn that son of a *****, he actually hang her from the ceiling. (Don't ask me how.) And then after falling down he actually attached a string to her leg that pulled the closet to fall on her.

She looked around realizing that the room was full of strings, with each connected to something, if she touches one she is going to die. She had to get out of here and kill that bastard. Kagura stepped over one at the same time as she bowed her head to the side to dodge the other. She was trying to move like a snake, but as China guessed Sadist was indeed smarter than that, while moving in between the two close strings she slightly touched the one.

There was a silence.

"I'm screwed." She thought and hell broke loose.

Fireworks, explosions, gun shoots, bears getting loose, lions roaring, cars running, trains riding, high pitched screams, splashing of water, crocodiles, monkeys, swords clashing, cutting through wood, Armstrong Cannon or whatever firing, sharks jumping, cannons, rockets, helicopters, mummies, King Kong, zombies, ships and finally a little bell rang. (How the bell even got in that small room?)

"Is that all you care about?" Kagura shouted as once more arrows hitting the wood and big round stone sliding down could be heard.

Kagura snapped, no crashed to shreds the door to the meeting room. All Shinsengumi officers turned towards her, even Mayora and Gorilla who were sitting at the top. Blue lines went down their faces as they saw in what condition she was and the pissed look on her face.

Kagura was all drenched, her clothes almost cut to shreds, her hair is a mess, even more horrible than Gin-chan's hair after an explosion, her eyes flaming with kill intend, there was blood on her, but no cuts, with that everyone knew that it was not her blood. Poor bears, lions, monkeys and all the other animals, everyone in the room thought.

Her eyes searched through the room finally spotting the one she needed… to kill, her rival.

"Sa-dist!" She said with low horror movie like voice, as if she was a ghost that came from hell well she looked like one anyways.

Everyone had chills run down their backs as she entered, so everyone runaway. The room was empty now, except for Sougo Okita. He was still sitting deadpanned expression on.

"Hi, China, you look as horrible as ever, got your period?" Okita asked in bored tone.

Kagura grabbed him by his collar moving him towards her anger marks on her and her bangs covering her eyes.

"Liked my alarm clock China? I did it for Hijikata, but decided to test it on you first." He smirked.

"Oh, I liked it. MY ASS!" She shouted throwing him across the room. But he turned landing on his feet. "You damn King of Sadists, what the hell were you trying to pull?"

"Well, a little pay back for last night."

"What do you mean last night?" Kagura snapped. "You were the one who bothered me and dragged me here, asshole!"

He looked at her bored. "You talk in your sleep China. So I smell like Danna's feet, huh? Then right now you smell like sushi."

"When did I ever say that? You don't smell like Gin-chan's feet." She kept shouting.

He arched a brow and she continued with a troll smile. "You smell even worse than that, I can live with Gin-chan's feet forever, but with your disgusting presence not even a second."

"Well, you smell like a skunk, China." He said approaching.

"Well, you smell like Sadaharu's dump, when he eats too much beans." She glared back.

"Well, you smell like a finger up gorilla's ass." Sougo shouted.

"Well, you smell like a mayonnaise up Mayora's ass." Kagura shouted back.

They were now standing face to face.

"Don't ever kiss anyone China, they're going to die, because you taste like shit."

"Yet, you liked it so much you tried it again."

There was silence and he continued.

"So you were awake, liked my kiss China?"

"You tasked like purple ninja's disgusting Natto's."

"Well, you tasted like, your beloved Anego's fried eggs."

"Your existence is as meaningless as Madao's, no even Madao have more meaning than you." Kagura shouted at him.

"Well, at least my existence have more meaning than you in Gintama, since all you do is walk around eating sukobu and being Yato doesn't matter anymore because your brother outsmarted you." Sougo retorted with ever so deadpanned expression.

"He will never outsmart me!"

"Oh, really?" Sougo smirked. "He has more fans than you and he was even ranked higher than you on the last popularity chart. You're a loser China! Go and Die, oh, yeah and on your way to hell take Hijikata with you."

Kagura grinned. "Oh, yeah Sadist, go read some Kamui X Sougo fan fictions, I think you suit each other."

"Go read some Hijikata X Kagura fiction, you're a perfect couple, MayoSukobu pairing."

"Go read Hijikata X Sougo yaoi fiction, they're even more popular." Kagura shouted.

"HijiGin (GinHiji) are more popular dumbass! You should try Takasugi X Kagura, best of all, psycho meets another psycho. Oh, no better than that, go date your idiot brother like everyone wanted in KamuKagu."

(OkiKagu are the most popular once you two idiots! You two are popular like hell, have you seen all the fan fictions about you too? They're countless!)

"SHUT UP!" China shouted. "At least the once I'm paired with are men! Not like you."

"I'm paired with men too…" Silence and realization hit Okita. "That's not what I meant." He shouted with anger marks.

Kagura looked at him with a troll smile. "Hehe… See Sadist you're so girly looking that everyone thinks you're a homo."

"You're the real homo, since up until the swimming pool episode no one actually realized you were a girl, you flat chest tomboy monkey."

She arched a brow smirking. "Well, then Mr. Oh-I'm-so-handsome-but-without-my-sister-I'm-no-one-but-a-lost-puppy prince, you will be the one who will marry this tomboy."

He looked at her expressionless. "Don't be so confident China, I'll only marry you if you have those mountains." Sougo pointed to the cloud above his head where Older China's image was standing.

"Shut up!" China shouted.

"I didn't know that you are a closet M, China. Want me to take you?" Sougo said with poker face.

"You damn pervert!" She attacked.

"Yet, you liked it when I touched you, so kinky are we." Sadist dodged the attack and they started an all through battle.

"Now, now you should stop fighting. Such a beautiful morning…" Kondo entered the room sweat running down his body as he was moving his hands like fans.

"Shut up Gorilla, you're not even popular." Sougo and Kagura said in unison stopping for a second to glare at him and then get back to their fight.

Kondo sat in the far corner growing mushrooms in the dark. "Why so cruel… All I want is a little more screen time with cool words…"

They kept on their fight when Aoi stepped between them grabbing Okita by his Shinsengumi uniform pants and Kagura's thorn pink pajama shorts and pulled them down. Revealing their underwear.

Both froze their eyes twitching as they slowly looked down at each other, now their bangs hiding a little blush that was on their faces.

"Ne, China so you're wearing red panties, trying to be sexy for me are you? Why are they wet, are you excited?" He deadpanned keeping a cool voice with mocking tone.

"SHUT UP!" She throws a kick at him and while he dodged she put her shorts back on, trying to hide her blush, Sougo did the same. Then she smirked looking at him. "What about you Sadist? Did you wet yourself?"

Aoi looked from one to another then pout shouting. "Mami~ Aoi hungry. Food! Food!"

Sougo stared at the little girl. "Damn brat, I'll kill you."

Yato female stepped in between the two, putting her umbrella against her rival's head as his katana stood near her neck. (So she had that damn parasol with her all this time? Honestly, where does she hide it?)

"In the same place this Sadistic Moron hides his bazooka." Kagura said to the thin air as if someone asked her something. "I'll kill you!" She said sounding like her brother.

"Move China. Aren't you angry at this little devil?"

"I'm pissed like hell." Kagura snapped. "At you for being here, for putting that damn alarm clock." If that thing can even be called an alarm clock. "So don't ever get close to me and my daughter again, you damn Sadistic Prince of planet Sadist!"

"She is also my daughter China. How do you think you produced it, pig youkai?" Sadist said with poker face. "If I didn't put my XXX into your XXX and we haven't XXX while you XXX…"

"STOP!" She shouted shooting with her umbrella, but as always Okita jumped away and kept dodging the bullets with his katana.

She picked up Aoi and turned around to leave.

"Wait!" Sadist said his voice staying calm as always. "Put this on." He threw his Shinsengumi jacket at Kagura.

China girl catch it, looking at it doubtfully then back at Sadist. "Did you put poison on it?"

"No!" He replied vein popping out. "You shouldn't go out looking like, you have just escaped a battle with an army of wild animals."

"I did!" She shouted anger marks on her. Kagura smirked. "Why are you so nice Sadist? Jealous? Worried about me? Didn't you say that I was a tomboy, so no one will look at me?"

"Shut up, glutton idiot. Use it then burn it for all I care." He turned around and left ruffling his hair.

Aoi smiled looking at her father's uniform jacket then grabbing it with both hands she buried her face in it with happiness, singing. "Papi~"

Staring at the back of Sadist's head as if trying to burn a hole in it, Kagura put Aoi down as soon as Sougo was out of the room and put his jacket on. It was big on her, covering till her mid-thigh and with only her fingers sticking out of the sleeves. She closed the front and then as if it was the most natural thing to do she took the hem of his collar and also sniffed at it filling her nose with his smell. Kagura blushed a little as she mumbled with a really low voice. "I think you don't smell that bad, Sadist."

 

* * *

 

Shimura Dojo.

After a long shower Kagura together with Aoi exited the bathroom. Kagura was wearing one of her favorite red Chinese dresses, while Aoi was also dressed in a pale blue colored with pink flowers Chinese dress looking like her young mother.

After she left the Shinsengumi barracks, she came straight to Anego, asking her to let her use the shower, since Yorozuya was too far and she wouldn't enjoy the shower there since Gin-chan and Shinpachi will be eating her brains out about where she was. Explaining to Otae everything just in two words, the older woman let her use the shower and also called the yorozuya asking Megane and perm head to bring her and Aoi some clothes.

It was relieving that yesterday Deva actually dropped by to give them some of Aoi's clothes, so she could change the little girl after a shower. She was a good mother at some point, if you ignored the fact that because of a fight with her so-called husband she left the girl to her younger self and went off somewhere playing. And it was good that her two useless guardians bring their clothes in one bag, so she could put the Shinsengumi jacket in it for no one to see, until she figures what to do with it. She should probably curse or poison it then give it back.

As she and her future daughter entered the living room she saw Gintoki and Shinpachi with Otae sitting behind the same table. Both Shimura siblings drinking tea, while silver samurai was having his usual strawberry milk. All of them were silent not asking anything, so Kagura realized that Anego must have told them everything already. China sends a silent 'Thank you!' to the older woman.

As soon as Aoi saw Gin-chan she run to him somehow climbing and sitting on his shoulders then burying her face in his hair she started to play with his perm. "Curly~. Curly~."

"Don't call me that, damn brat." Gintoki shouted with anger mark as he almost spilled his milk.

Shinpachi smiled. "She sure likes you Gin-san. As I thought you're good with kids."

"No, Patsuan that's not it. It's just Gin-san's natural charm you know, no one can go against it." Natural perm head said with dead fish eyes.

"Don't be so blunt, Gin-san you're rating as number 1 will drop." Otae said with her usual smile.

"Heh, yet yours will never go up in ranks." He managed to say, before the gorilla woman beat him up, Shinpachi taking Aoi away just in time.

In Shinpachi's arms Aoi kept looking at him with deadpanned face, just like Sougo.

"Aoi-chan, how are you feeling?" Megane asked with a smile.

Little girl kept staring at him them said with a cute voice while smiling, now she looked like Kamui. (Honestly, this girl took after everyone related to her parents.) "Who are you~?"

Blue lines went down on his face and a gloomy aura around him. "You don't remember me…"

As soon as Gin-chan stood up to sit on his place and poured another glass of Strawberry milk, Aoi pushed away from Shinpachi and returned to sitting on Gintoki's shoulders playing with his hair.

Otae returned to her place, Kagura sitting beside her. China girl looked at her Anego's chest, the woman's breasts being not so big, but still they were there, then she looked at her own, there was none, well there was a little looked from an angle, but they were smaller than Tae's at least that what it seemed under the clothes.

In some shoots they seemed big, in some smaller and in some scenes she didn't even had any. It depends on the mangaka's drawing she guessed, then got pissed. Why can't that gorilla draw me normally, like a real heroine with big mountains? Well, my future self is like that, but how?

She once again looked at her Anego, then back at herself, then she remembered Sa-chan's breasts, then looked at herself, then she remembered Tsukky, then once again looked back at herself, then she remembered Gin-chan as Pako, then looked back at herself and lastly she remembered the Deva, her older self and then looked back at her younger body. How in the world did I grow them in just couple of years?

"Anego?" Kagura started, opening and closing her hands over her breasts as if trying to catch something.

"Yes, Kagura-chan?" Otae said with sweet voice and her usual smile.

"How can I make my boobs grow bigger?"

As Kagura said that everyone in the room spit the liquids they have been drinking on the person sitting opposite to them. Then all turned looking at the young Yato female with shocked eyes, while Aoi was the only one unaffected by it, she just kept smiling and playing with Gin-chan's silver perm.

 

* * *

 

Somewhere in the abandoned park, under the shade of a tree Bakaiser Sougo Okita was laying, his arms behind his head and sleeping peacefully. He was really tired of running after that damn China beast for the whole night, he should really make a perfect punishment plan for her, so she will regret ever messing with him. Damn that girl, if she ever gets in trouble again there is no way in hell he's saving her, while risking his butt as always. Dream on, China!

He was seeing a perfect dream about his wife, S&M room, banned toys and all kinds of punishment he was performing on her. (His dream can't be displayed for broadcasting issues.) Also there were whips, candles and some other stuff, yeah he will definitely enjoy his life for another six month as soon as he gets their assess back home.

A phone ring broke his fantasy and he woke up. Taking off his favorite sleeping mask that he still had even though he was older, Sougo picked up the phone.

"Yes?" He said with a bored voice. "Oh, nii-chan, it's such a surprise for you to call?" He listened for a while then said.

"Sorry nii-chan, I can't come. I'm dealing with your sister's selfish wishes right now. Thanks for an offer. Eh? What?"

Another minute passed. "Oh, I see. Okay then." Sougo closed the phone frowning. If what that bastard psycho nii said is true then we're screwed.

After a while another phone call came he picked up again this time answering with annoyance. "Go die Hijibaka! Why are you still alive?"

"DAMN YOU SOUGO! WHAT WAS THAT SNAKE AND BOMB? YOU EVEN PUT THE BEAR INTO THE BATHUB? ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL US?" Hijikata, (from the future, by the way Kamui also called from the future just now), shouted through the speaker his annoyance as clear as the day.

"Don't you already know the answer?" Okita said with poker face.

"Damn you!" Toushi cursed as he light the cigarette. Click. Click. And then boom. "Bastard, you even put a bomb in my lighter?" Mayo shouted through the phone.

"Tch. You survived again?" Sougo showed a bored face.

"Listen to me, Bakaiser. I heard from that damn yorozuya where you, little sadist and your wife went for your Sadistic Family vacation, so let me warn you. There is a problem and…"

"I already heard that part from an annoying older brother, so tell me something new." Bakaiser said with a serious voice. Hijikata nodded and continued, Sadist listening closely.


	6. When two Sadist's and two China's meet it turns put to be fun, but when there is more than one Gin-chan, you just know that there will be more annoyance and laziness.

Yorozuya.

"Gin-san, we've got mail." Shinpachi called out as he entered the yorozuya.

"Just throw it away Patsuan." Perm head said sitting behind his table his feet placed on it while he was reading his Jump. "In this time and age the only once who send mails are psycho's or stalker. We have a whole bunch of both, so throw them away."

Megane looked at him with dead fish empty eyes as he sat on the couch opposite to the other where Kagura was sleeping and Sadaharu snoring on the corner, while Aoi was sleeping on the huge white dog's back, cuddled in his fur.

Shinpachi started to look through the letters. "Bills. Bills. Bills. Coupons. Bills. Sa-chan-san's fake weeding, Katsura-san on the stand by, a threat from Kamui, Laugh from Sakamoto-san, threat from Kihietai, bills, threat from Otose-san, bill from Otose, bill from Shinsengumi, complaint on Sadaharu, another fake weeding invitation, oh…"

Megane stopped taking out the plain white convert which had 'Kagura' written on it, with big letters. "Kagura-chan, it seems like there is a letter for you."

At that Kagura was wide-awake from her sleep, jumping up, grabbing the convert off Patsuan's hands and sitting back opening it. There was a small piece of paper and three tickets to the aquarium. 'Tomorrow is Aoi's birthday, but since I'm busy with dealing with you from the future take care of it. Bakaiser.'

"Gin-chan, Shinpachi!" Kagura shouted with happiness.

"Shh. Be quiet Kagura-chan, Aoi-chan is still sleeping." Megane tried to calm down a really excited Yato female who was jumping up and down on the couch.

"Tomorrow is Aoi-chan's birthday." She jumped down and run to the silver hair that was still looking uninterested. "Gin-chan, we have to do something for her. Let's throw her a birthday party."

"This is great! I'll talk with Aneue; we can do the celebration in our house. I'll deal with the invitations." Shin-chan was also excited already planning the guest list. "I'll call her right away."

"Don't bother. Don't bother." Gintoki said with a bored voice. "What's so good about birthdays? She is getting older, you know? There is nothing to celebrate. In couple of years she is going to cry saying. Oh, I'm so old, I want to be 18 again."

"SHE IS TURNING TWO!" Both younger yorozuya's shouted in unison.

"You shouldn't be like this Gin-san, birthdays are great events, and you get to meet all your friends…"

"Food and presents." Kagura added nodding like she just discovered the youth potion.

"You can make lots of memories." Shinpachi continued.

"Food and presents." Kagura interrupted once again.

"You get all your wishes come true since this is your birthday."

"Food and presents."

"You get to enjoy…"

"Food and presents."

Feeling last of his patience fade away Shinpachi shouted. "YOU'RE ONLY AFTER FOOD AND PRESENTS, AREN'T YOU?! AND BESIDES WHY ARE YOU SO EXCITED THIS IS AOI-CHAN'S BIRTHDAY, NOT YOURS."

"I'm her mother, of course I'm excited." Kagura said with superior voice.

Megane looked at her with dead fish eyes. "You just want free food, don't you?"

Gin waved a hand in dismissal. "Do whatever you want, but don't bother Gin-san in here. I'm busy."

Shinpachi sigh. "I won't ask you to do anything, just buy her a present will you?"

"I'll just give her this Jump when I finish."

"JUST HOW LAZY ARE YOU? GO BUY A PROPER PRESENT OR YOU'RE FINISHED."

Megane fixed his glasses returning his attention to Kagura. "Well, me and Aneue will do the planning, but what will you do with Aoi-chan till the evening Kagura-chan? She shouldn't be around till the party or it won't be a surprise anymore."

"Oh, no problem." Kagura said cheerful taking the three tickets off the table and waving them in front of Shinpachi. "I have these, we will just go there and come back in time for the party."

Megane looked at tickets with a surprise. "Where did you find those Kagura-chan?"

"They're from Bakaiser. It looks like he promised to take her to the aquarium on her birthday, so I'll be taking her."

"Considering that you and Souichirou-kun hate each other, Bakaiser and you get along pretty well." Gintoki commented not looking up from his jump.

Kagura nodded hands crossed over her chest. "That's because we both hate Sougo Okita (present), to the same level."

Shin's eyes went wide. "But Bakaiser-san is Okita-kun's older self right? Why would he hate him?"

Yato female shrug pouting her lip. "Don't know, but it seems like it has something to do with me, travel in time and killing." She shook her head.

Silence fell in yorozuya. Everyone was quiet and no one thinking about breaking the silence.

Kagura was the first to speak; she looked at the tickets and sigh. "But there are three of them. What should I do? Shinpachi will you come with us?"

"Sorry, Kagura-chan, I'll be preparing everything for the party." Shinpachi gave her an apology smile.

"Gin-chan?" Younger girl looked at her guardian.

"I told you, to not bother me." Gintoki waved a hand in dismissal.

Yato girl sat on the couch, legs crossed like in a lotus position as she holds her chin making names run through her mind.

Gorilla – DENIED! (He's busy stalking Anego he will be a bother.)

Mayora – DENIED! (I'll be sick if he starts eating his dog food.)

Madao – DENIED! (He doesn't have money, plus he is a loser.)

Zura – DENIED! (He keeps running from tax robbers).

Kyuubei – DENIED! (She will be helping Anego.)

Anego – DENIED! (She will be busy.)

Tsukky – DENIED! (I like her, but no, besides she is also busy with present.)

Elizabeth? – DENIED! (Simply denied.)

Catherine – ABSOLUTELY DENIED!

10\. Tama? – Well she might be…

"Kagura-chan?" Shinpachi's voice broke her out of her thoughts.

Vermilion haired girl looked at him as he was sitting in front of her writing something.

"I was thinking…" Megane continued. "If it was Bakaiser-san who promised Aoi-chan a date in the aquarium, then why not go with him?"

"He is busy looking for me." The girl said and wanted to go back to her thoughts as Shin continued.

"Then ask Okita-san. I mean Aoi-chan would be more happy with both her parents on her birthday than just one."

Kagura arched a brow, but then shouted shaking her head. "NO WAY IN HELL! TO SPEND THE WHOLE DAY WITH THE SADIST! NO, NO, NO! EVEN AOI CAN'T MAKE ME DO THIS!"

"Kagura-chan, maybe you and Okita-kun are rivals right now, but in the future with some amazing, magical and unbelievable twist of fate you somehow end up married and as a child Aoi-chan needs love of her parents. Since you keep saying she is your daughter, then eat your pride and do something for her."

Kagura scratched her head looking at the little girl sleeping on huge dog's back, and she was still sleeping despise all the shouting. Well, that was due to her parents it seems, since when Deva and Bakaiser or Sadist and China are involved there is always shouting and fighting, for different reasons sometimes, but there should be one.

"Even though I said that, will he even agree? Maybe you should…" Shinpachi didn't get to finish as the younger girl cut him.

China smiled with troll smile. "Don't worry Patchy, Bakaiser gave me a really good trump card back then. Sadist won't be running away this time."

A water drop was falling above Patsuan's head as he was looking at the girl with empty eyes. "You and that man get along so well, it's frightening."

Grinning with evil intend China girl turned around leaving the yorozuya. "I'll be back soon. Take care of Aoi for me."

 

* * *

 

Next day in Yorozuya.

Gin-chan was sleeping in his chair behind his table, his weekly Jump on his face and his arms on his chest. Yorozuya was empty and quiet, Shinpachi away preparing for the party, Kagura out with Aoi and Sadaharu god-knows-where.

"Oi, Sakata Gintoki, wake up." A deep and familiar voice called out to him in the silence. Thinking it's his imagination Gin didn't reacted at all. "Oi, didn't you hear me? I said wake up, Gin-san!"

"Customer-san if you're here for a job, then go away, it's my nap time. Shoo-Shoo."

Getting pissed, intruder took the Jump off the perm head's face and hit him with the book using all his might, so that yorozuya flew from his place crashing to the floor. "I TOLD YOU TO GET YOUR USELESS ASS UP, GIN-SAN DOESN'T LIKE WAITING!"

Silver hair jumped up from the floor glaring at the man with fury. "Who the fuck do you think you are jackass?"

"You're the jackass! How can you be so stupid leaving the door wide open and sleeping like dead?" Intruder shouted back as he came face to face with Gin-chan.

"It's none of your business asshole. Get out of here you damn intruder, want to die, huh? Have a death wish?" Gintoki retort back as he pushed his forehead against the other man.

"Why do you have to be such a stone head? No, rather was I really this much of a senseless idiot? Gin-san is sad. Gin-san won't accept it!" The man shouted stepping one step away from the Yorozuya to look at him with bored, but at the same time pissed expression.

For a moment perm head stopped his glaring and hold back the urge to punch the guy in the face when he realized who was in front of him. He was fully awake now and could clearly look at the man older than him by few years.

Intruder seemed awfully familiar, he was wearing a kimono, white with blue, one shoulder off revealing the black costume underneath. He had a wooden sword at his right, but his revelation point was his natural perm silver hair.

Gintoki straighten up all his expressions changing into the bored, poker face and his eyes going into dead fish mode. He leaned over and started poking the man in front of him on his eye. "EH~ did we always had a mirror in here?"

*Poke* *Poke*

"STOP IT, IDIOT! YOU'RE GOING TO CRASH MY EYE!" Getting pissed Silver samurai grabbed the other's finger and started twisting it with a satisfied look. "Listen to me, I'm Sakata Gintoki, Yorozuya leader and Gintama's number 1, undeniable leader Gintoki."

"I get it! I get it!" Gin-chan started shouting while pleading trying to get free from the man's hold on his finger.

Silver samurai finally let go of Gin-chan and moved over to the couch, making himself comfortable. Perm head did the same his bored look on while he sat across from his older self.

"So first those two brats now it's me traveling. Why did you come? Will you tell me that I'm also married and with kids?" Gintoki jumped up. "So who did I marry? Don't tell me that it's one of the Amazons, I don't want to! No, thanks! So who is it? It's Ketsuno Ana, right? It's her right?"

Silver sempai looked at the Yorozuya leader, his dead fish, bored eyes returning. "With the state of your current mind future and the truth might be too hard for you. I don't want for Gin-chan to suffer." He said the last line with more sarcasm.

Why am I so good at pissing myself off? Is this what Hijikata feels when I keep annoying him? No wonder he is always furious when he sees me, I want to freaking punch my pretty face that's how pissed I am.

"So why are you here Gin-san? Hurry it up since I have lots of things to do. I'm a busy man you know."

Silver samurai looked around the place poker face on. "Don't lie to me Gin-san I better than anyone know that you don't have even a single job, so don't waste time. As for why am I here? Well, I…."

He was about to say something when the door opened and Patsuan walked in saying. "Gin-san, the door is wide open. Don't be so…" Megane froze on the doorframe looking from one silver head to another.

Both Gintoki's were sitting opposite from each other, one of them picking his nose, while the other was picking his ear.

"Eh… Eh… WHY IS THERE TWO GIN-SAN's? This story should have had only OkiKagu adult, why in the world is there another future self."

"Calm down Patsuan, it's nothing to be worried about." Silver hair said wiping the 'treasure' from his nose on the couch. "Come sit with Gin-san for a while." He patted the spot beside him.

Patchy looked at both with empty look. "You haven't change Gin-san. Be it Bakaiser or Kagura they become more mature, but you're same lazy ass yorozuya aren't you Gin-chan?"

Silver arched a brow. "Yet, even after 5 years I'm popular with lots of fans and 1st place on the charts while you've changed your ranking." When Shinpachi looked hopeful future yorozuya continued with a grin. "Yeah, instead of an 8, you're now 888. Plus, you're still a virgin with no girlfriend what-so-ever."

"NANI?!" Shin-chan started shouting. "What kind of a change is that? I went to worse, why did I go down 880 points, why am I ranked lower than the secondary characters? And what do you mean virgin? Why did anyone get to have a lover, but me? Why am I single?"

Ignoring the ratting above their heads, Silver returned his attention to his younger (well, he is by five years) self. Gin-chan was looking bored and uninterested as he was picking his ear as if he was trying to find gold in there, anything that will make him rich.

"Where are Bakaiser and Kagura? They took so long coming back, I was forced to… had to come to pick them up."

Gintoki looked at the other man with empty eyes. You were forced in here, aren't you? "Don't know. Don't care. They seem to be fighting. Kagura is running away and Bakaiser chasing, like a cat mouse fight."

Silver waved a hand in dismissal. "They're always like that. Geez, what was the point of getting married if they keep being rivals."

"I'm more angry that you let our innocent Kagura-chan to be taken by that damn man, Souichirou."

"He's not Souichirou, he is Souji." The older Gintoki commented.

"NO IT'S NOT! HE IS SOUGO! IF YOU'RE FIXING IT THEN DO IT RIGHT!" Megane shouted.

"Whatever you will know the reasons later. So where is the other brat, that little sadist?"

Gintoki yawned. "Today is that brats birthday, so those two took her to the aquarium."

Silver samurai nodded and moved out of the room, then come back with a big dark green bag full of something. Both Shinpachi and Gintoki stared at the bag with amazement.

Perm head smiled at the man. "What, you're playing Santa this year? Oh, I've been a good boy this year ossan, so give me a present."

"THESE ARE NOT FOR YOU!" Future yorozuya leader shouted putting the bag he was holding down. "It's that little sadistic brats birthday, so when everyone learned about me coming here they gave me all this presents, so I can pass them to the brat."

Shinpachi's eyes went wide. "So many! Everyone really loves Aoi-chan, don't they?" Patsuan smiled. "Well, we will be giving the presents during the party, so lets take this bag there too. Aoi-chan will be so happy when she gets so many presents."

Silver samurai nodded following the younger man. Gin-chan stared after the two and said. "Well, then with all these presents I don't have to buy a present, safe."

"YOU'RE NOT! I TOLD YOU TO FIND A DECENT PRESENT LAZY BASTARD!" Shinpachi shouted before leaving.

"Huh? She won't even realize if mine is there or not. Besides she has two of us let him do this." Gin-chan picked his nose.

Vein popped at Shin and Silver's head. "DO YOUR OWN JOB YOURSELF DAMN IT!"

 

* * *

 

At the aquarium.

A big crowd was gathered in the main hall with a huge stage in the middle that was decorated with hearts and broken hearts.

"Well, now…" Narrator began. "We'll be starting our annual unique competition that we hold in the aquarium every month, that's called "I hate you more than you hate me", this is where married couples not only fight to show their love to each other, that would be boring." He made an unpleasant face and crowd agreed.

"They also fight to show their hate and all the unpleasant feelings towards each other. Now then we have three couples in here that will be fighting with all their might, showing just how much they hate each other. For the big price they have to go through few obstacles and show us who hates who more, so that in the end we can ask them the important question."

"And our contestants: Hiroshi-san and his wife Aki, Saki-san and her husband Shiiba and then finally, today we actually have a newly wed couple in here. Makes you wonder why they married if they already hate each other?" Narrator commented and crowd laughed. "Sougo and Kagura."

"Now then lets see who hates their partner more and who will get the big prize. Let's start!"


	7. If you can't win, then steal the price and run, Stat! No seriously never do that you will get arrested.

Snack Smile.

Everyone was gathered there, Otae, Kyuubei, Ayumu, even Kondo and Hijikata was there waiting for Gin and Shin to come. Well, they were shocked to see 2 Gin-chan's enter the place.

"Gin-san did you clone yourself?" Otae said with a smile.

"We have one too many idiots around here and now they started to multiply." Hijikata commented lighting a cigarette. Hearing that anger mark appeared on both Gins' face.

"This is me from the future assholes." Gintoki shouted.

Silver put down the bag with presents he was holding and approached Toushi. He put his both hands on vice-commander's shoulders and said with a crying face.

"Toushi, it's been a long time. We missed you so much." Silver samurai cried.

Everyone looked at them, even Gin-chan himself as Hijikata vein popping out shouted. "What the hell is wrong with you yorozuya? Finally lost it."

Silver stepped back taking out the frame with black ribbon that had Toushi's picture in it. "In two years you will die from a lung cancer. I told you not to smoke. I told you not to do that. Why Toushi? Why?" Silver cried more.

"NANI?!" Everyone shouted.

"I haven't seen you for three years now. Ah, it's so good to see my old rival. You have grown."

"STOP SPOUTING NONSENSE! HOW CAN I GROW IF THIS IS THE PAST?!" Vice-commander kept shouting.

"Toushi you should quit smoking. I don't want you dead." Kondo said with a serious voice, but there was tears and snot running down his face.

"THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THAT! BESIDES JUST TWO CHAPTERS BACK, THAT IDIOT BAKAISER TALKED TO ME IN THE FUTURE!"

Gintoki wiped his face and with poker face said. "I don't have come back to that."

Countless anger marks appeared on Mayora. "SO YOU WERE LYING! YOU DAMN JACKASS YOROZUYA, STOP TELLING LIES THAT WILL MAKE FAN GIRLS CRY!"

"Eh? So it was a lie?" Everyone looked at the perm head that was in front of the sign writing something. From Gintoki's confused face, but still dead fish eyes everyone turned their attention to the sign. It read:

Aoi-chan's birthday and Hijikata-kun's death celebration party!"

"THE HELL!" Toushi shouted, passing the Silver samurai and grabbing the other Gintoki by his collar with pissed look. "WHAT KIND OF A SIGN IS THAT? WHY WOULD YOU BE CELEBRATING MY DEATH? YOU WANT TO DIE BASTARD. WANT ME TO SEND YOU TO THE AFTER LIFE."

Gin-chan picked his ear, looking at Hijikata with poker face. "Calm down Oogushi-kun. It's not my fault that Silver head lied."

"THAT'S NOT THE POINT!" Toushi swing his sword, but Gin dodged. Then vice-commander glared at both man and said. "Damn it, with two of them it's really hard to come up with enough come backs."

Devil vice-commander glared at the camera. "Hey you, Author! If you were bringing him in, then at least show me a little help and send my future here two. I can't keep up with two useless yorozuya's at the same time."

"It's not going to happen." Silver said picking his nose. "I wouldn't wait for your future if I were you. Bakaiser put him up to some business, so he won't come. Besides with two Sadist's, two Kagura's, two Gin-san's and two Mayora's it will be too crowded." Silver samurai said with bored tone.

"IT'S ALREADY CROWED!" Toushi shouted at the future yorozuya.

Otae clapped her hands as if she was a teacher calming the class and when she took their attention with a smile Mrs. Gorilla continued. "Now, then shall we prepare for Aoi-chan's birthday?"

 

* * *

 

Some run down building.

Bakaiser was standing above the mountain of bodies that he defeated in last 30 minutes and was holding one of the men by his collar glaring at him. "I'm asking for the last time. Who send you to fight me? And where is my wife?"

Man cried pleading. "I don't know. We were ordered to do this by some man, it was the first time I saw him. We don't even know who he is, but I guess he goes by the name Fox or something."

Bakaiser arched a brow. So it is indeed that bastard who's behind this.

"Please let me go. My mommy made a pie, so I want to go and eat it. It's my favorite, please. She will be angry if I don't go." Man said while crying with snot down his face.

Bakaiser smiled, the kind of smile that made him look like Kamui with his fake, trademark smiles. "Sure, I'll let you go…" And the next second they were standing on the edge of the cliff. "Off the cliff!"

Sougo let go of the man, so that he started falling while shouting. But then the rope on his leg pulled him up making him rise to the sky and then fall again. Man shouted. "Help!" And kept screaming like a girl.

Bakaiser looked at the man with an evil grin, but then turned around his face becoming serious. Damn you China, what kind of danger you got yourself into this time.

Flashback.

"Remember this Sougo Okita, one day, one day I'll definitely come back and take away your precious lover and everything important to you! Everything you were going to risk your life to protect! I'll take it away from you and then; you will regret what you did. You will regret ever meeting me and not killing me when you had a chance." Man said with an evil smirk as he was pushed inside the patrol car.

End of Flashback.

"You're an idiot China beast, would it kill you to listen to me at least once?" Sougo sigh as he started walking back, to keep searching for Kagura, well, at least now he knows who's behind this.

 

* * *

 

Aquarium.

In front of the big aquarium Kagura and Aoi were sitting around a small campfire and pretending to warm up. Guard approached them with a troubled look and confusion.

"Um, miss you can't camp in here. You're disturbing the other customers."

Kagura looked at him with pleading eyes, wrinkly and dried face, that looked like she has not eaten in months. "What are you saying aru~? We have to eat something o we will die aru~ Do you want to become a cause of murder of the young girl aru~?"

Guard sweat dropped. "Um, like I said we have a café in here, you can't camp this is…"

Before he could finish Sougo approached them holding a huge fork with a big fish sticking to it. "Oi China, we have a dinner. I catch big one this time."

"Bravo Sadist, for once you did good." Kagura and Aoi fake clapped with dead fish eyes.

"STOP IT!" Guard shouted. "WHY ARE YOU ACTING LIKE THIS IS THE MOST NATURAL THING TO DO? THIS IS AN AQUARIUM FOR LOOKING AT FISH NOT CATCHING THEM! ARE YOU MORONS? THIS IS NOT A CAMPING PLACE!"

"Want to join us?" China looked at him confused, but really bored picking her nose.

"NO!"

"Eh? Is there a sign that says we can't eat this fish? Fish are for eating you know? What are you collecting them and then sell it to the fish shops when they die." Kagura asked innocently looking for a pan to put the huge fish.

Guard looked at them with water drop falling over his head. "You don't usually have to put it in the aquarium, you know? People don't usually fish here."

"Then they are idiots. There are some good looking fish in here." Sougo said sitting down.

Kagura took the fish wearing a sushi bar chief costume and with professional kind of funny moves she wanted to cut the fish when guard pulled the fish away shouting. "I said stop it! This is not a picnic!" Then feeling the fish already loosing last of his life force guard run with the fish towards the tank.

"Now we don't have a dinner." Kagura sighs with disappointment. "Sorry Aoi-chan, I'll… EH?"

Kagura jumped up looking around shocked as she realized that Aoi was not there sitting beside her. "Sadist, where is Aoi?"

Sougo frowned also standing up to look around. "Can't believe you lost her China."

Being already worried Kagura didn't care for a punch line, but ran around the place looking for the little Sadist Yato girl. "Aoi-chan! Aoi-chan! Where are you?"

"Mommy~ Papa~" Aoi called out.

Hearing her voice Kagura froze and sigh with relief as she saw the little girl in front of the big signboard. She runs to her future daughter hugging her. "Don't ever do that Aoi-chan. Scared me to death."

"Mommy, this~" Aoi pointed at something.

China looked with confusion at the signboard. "What is it?"

"It looks like that necklace catch her interest. It's kind of familiar looking though." Sougo said as he approached them with poker face.

Kagura looked carefully at the necklace her eyes widening with realization. "That's my necklace. But wait, mine is at home. How?" She corrected herself looking confused now.

"Mommy necklace~"

"Eh? Mine?" China looked at it once more this time recognizing the initials that were printed on the backside. "Ah, Deva's!"

"How do you know it's hers? It can be any random thing, there bunch of…"

"It is hers. It has initials S.O engraved on the backside of it see? Mine still have baldy's name on it." She pointed at the picture. "Besides I can recognize what's mine."

Sougo scratched his head with bored expression. "Its just a necklace China, you will buy a new one."

"It's not just a necklace, you jackass. That's a momentous from my mother and a traditional item."

"What's one has to do with the other?"

Kagura sigh. "We Yato's don't wear any accessories and rings since that will be on the way of a fight, so every family has a special necklace with symbol of the family engraved on it. My mommy and daddy both had flowers on theirs. Well, when we get married parents pass those pendants to their children, so that younger once can engrave the name of their lover on the back side of it. It kind of marks us as the others, well like telling everyone who you belong to."

"Are you playing dogs and owners?" Sougo deadpanned, but jumped in time to dodge Kagura's parasol that almost crashed his skull.

"Before Kamu-nii left home, he took pappy's necklace and I took mommy's. Mine is still hidden in my closet; I don't really know what baka-nii did with his though. Anyways, Bakaiser had silver necklace, similar to this, on him, that was one of the reasons why I believed him when he told me who he was."

At that Sadist arched a brow. "But I'm not a Yato and I don't ever remember having such a girly thing on me." And another swing came towards his head, but he once again dodged it.

Yato female gave a troll smile towards the guy. "But Bakaiser said that you almost begged me to make a replica of mine, so everyone will now about us. You are such a jealous guy Sadist. Admit it, you're crazy in love with me."

This time it was Sougo's turn to swing his sword that Kagura dodged and the battle begin. Aoi-chan was still standing before the board and looking at her parents, maybe she should make them kiss again.

 

* * *

 

Three hours later.

A big crowd was gathered in the main hall with a huge stage in the middle that was decorated with hearts and broken hearts.

"Well, now…" Narrator began. "We'll be starting our annual unique competition that we hold in the aquarium every month, that's called "I hate you more than you hate me", this is where married couples not only fight to show their love to each other, that would be boring." He made an unpleasant face and crowd agreed.

"They also fight to show their hate and all the unpleasant feelings towards each other. Now then we have three couples in here that will be fighting with all their might, showing just how much they hate each other. For the big price they have to go through few obstacles and show us who hates who more, so that in the end we can ask them the important question."

"And our contestants are: Hiroshi-san and his wife Aki, Saki-san and her husband Shiiba and then finally, today we actually have a newly wed couple in here. Makes you wonder why they married if they already hate each other?" Narrator commented and crowd laughed. "Sougo and Kagura."

"Now then lets see who hates their partner more and who will get the big prize. Let's start!"

"So why should I even get involved in this competition with you China?" Sougo asked with his usual dead panned voice.

"Shut up, Sadist!" Kagura said with pissed voice. "We have to get that damn necklace back. It's a momentous of my mother and Aoi-chan wants it."

"Its your necklace you get it."

"I can't just steal it, you bastard! Besides this is a perfect competition to see who hates whom more, don't you think so?"

Okita yawned. "Not interested!"

"One of the prizes is this brand new bazooka with some extra features. Especially for the people who wants to kill their vice-commander." Narrator said winking at the crowed.

Kagura looked at the man with empty look. This sounds like it was planned. She turned to Sadist and wasn't surprised to see him grin like a devil. He was interested all right.

"First, tell us how long have you been married and if you have kids. Why did you join the competition?" Narrator asked the couples with a huge smile.

"We have three kids and we have been married for 8 years already. We just decided to check, it seemed fun." First couple said.

"We're married for 10 years now." Second couple started. "We have a 5 year old son, we're here for the money."

Crowed clapped and narrator turned his attention towards the young couple. "So we now that you're newlywed's, so there no kids, but…"

"We do have a kid." Kagura interrupted. Before entering the competition they 'asked' (more like threatened) the guard from earlier to watch over Aoi, so she was now sitting with a guard on the bench close by, so her Sadistic parents can see her and watching the whole thing.

Narrator froze with confusion. "Eh? You do? How old is she?"

"Two." Okita said.

"Um? How long have you two been married?"

"5 minutes." They both said in unison.

Narrator gulped down still confused and then forced a laugh. "What a funny couple. Don't really want to say how long, huh? Ha-ha…" And crowd also tried their best to laugh.

"Well, then there will be three competitions and each will give you at max 5 points if you prove your hate, 3 if you make us believe that there even a little dislike and 0 if you start turning this into Shoujo manga. The audience is the once voting." Narrator wait for the crowd to cheer, but no one did, so he continued. "Now for the first one, we will need your kids on the stage."

Kids with cute older women that seemed to be the models hired by the competition sponsors bring the kids in, putting them on the little playground. Little once started to play and laugh and crowd went all sentimental for them.

"Now then," Host started. "For the first competition, we will have your kids say what happens in your family during the fights."

Kids started explaining, first one, 6 year-old girl. "When my mama and papa fight they always shout and then brake lots of dishes and then buy me a present."

"That's called bribe." Host mumbled moving to another one. "So what can you say?"

This time it was a 5-year-old boy. "My mama and papa fight in the bedroom and when I knock, they scream 'Not now!' and I go away, but papa always have that red dots on him."

Audience and narrator all gulped looking at his parents with empty looks. After few minutes it was Aoi's turn. Host sat near her and brings the microphone towards her. At first the Sadist Yato girl thought it was an ice cream trying to bite it, but narrator moved it away quick whipping Aoi's saliva from it.

"So tell us, what your mama and papa do when they fight?" Aoi looked at him confused and he changed the question. "Do you parents like to fight?" Aoi nodded with a smile. "What they do then?"

"First mama shout~ then papa shout~" Aoi started with a cute voice.

"Quite simple, ne?" Narrator interrupted gaining a glare from the audience with a long "Shush!"

"Then mama hit and papa hit~ Then~ Bang-bang. Then boom-boom. Then crash-crash." Aoi stopped taking a deep breath and with her cheeks pink continued. "Then we fix house~ Then papa kiss mama~ then mama shoot-shoot~ Then papa boom-boom~ Then papa chain mama~ Then cutting clothes~ Papa smile~ Mama red~ And mama scream…" Before she could say another word Kagura covered her mouth, blushing till her ears.

Narrator with confusion moved a step back from them saying to the camera. "We'll be back after the commercial." Crowd sighs with disappointment.

"Aoi-chan, don't ever say that out aloud okay?" After an understanding cute nod from the little girl China moved away, leaving her daughter to play with the kids.

Kagura stood up glaring at Okita who was unaffected and just standing dear with bored look. "Damn you, you Sadistic bastard! What the hell have you been showing to Aoi?"

"It's not me China. It was Bakaiser."

"Shut up! It will be you in the future! DON'T TEACH KIDS THINGS LIKE THAT MORON!" Kagura shouted and charged at him, with them once again starting to battle.

While her parents were indeed involved in another fight Aoi kept playing alone when the 6-year-old girl from earlier approached her. Aoi looked at her with her poker face that was similar to her father and returned to her game with toys.

"Humph! With someone as ugly as you I don't have to worry. I'm way cuter than you and besides my mama and papa are rich you know, we will win this no doubt." Girl said with a mighty voice.

Aoi ignored her and girl got pissed. "How dare you ignore me? I'm the number one beauty queen, bow before me."

Aoi stand up this time smiling like Kamui and approached the girl. "Okay." She pretends to bow down as she ripped the girls dress apart. Girl blushed screaming and run to her mother.

After a minute in were the girl's parents that came towards Aoi. "Hey, you what do you think you're doing to my daughter?" The girl's father said with pissed voice with his daughter hiding behind him and showing tongue to Aoi.

"What's going on?" Sougo approached them with poker face; Aoi smiled seeing him and run to hide behind him too.

"Papa~ they bully me~"

"Don't you dare to lie insolent brat, you were the one who bullied my girl." The man shouted.

In a second Sougo draw his sword pointing it against the man's neck with his crimson eyes glaring at him. "Don't you dare to raise your voice on my daughter, bastard!"

Mean gulped hard sweat dropping. His wife put a hand over his shoulder looking down at Aoi. "Leave them dear, those low class people who don't even know their place will never understand. They're just scum…"

She didn't get to finish as Kagura pointed the end of her umbrella at the woman making her froze in fear. "I dare you to repeat that again, bitch! What did you just called my family?" China's eyes were as well shinning with fury.

Woman shivered. "They're crazy. They're crazy. Dear called the police!" Man took out his phone shaking.

Sougo and China lowered their weapons, both smiling like troll. "Ne, Sadist they're calling the police."

"Ma'am, what might be the problem?" Sougo showed them his badge. "Shinsengumi first division captain Sougo Okita. How can I help you?" He said mocking.

The pair's eyes went wide as the narrator approached them. "What might be the problem?"

"This people attacked us. They want to win by using violence. They should be disqualified." Man said as he and his wife smirked as if superior.

"Now, now…" Narrator was troubled, trying to calm them down. "They didn't do anything right? So lets just warn them, warn."

"No! I want them kicked out or I'm calling my brother. You know who my brother is?" Women shouted. "His best friends with Shogun's right hand man's third secretary's uncle's second wife's brother's wife's cousin."

Kagura looked at Sadist with empty look. "Sadist I want to beat them."

"We'll be disqualified."

She sighs. "Let's just steal the necklace."

Okita smirked. "Like the idea."

In just one minute of time the whole place was in chaos as Sadistic family really teach those arrogant adults lesson and then took the necklace running away, oh yeah, they also grabbed the promised new bazooka, new DVD player, game center and many toys for Aoi. How did they run away with all that? Beats me.


	8. When people say that they don't want any presents for their birthday don't believe them, because those kind of people are the once who might hate you for life if you don't buy them one.

Bakaiser broke the door to the warehouse. At least 20 men charging at him as soon as he stepped in. With just few swings of his sword while his eyes were blazing with fury he cut everyone down making a way for himself towards the titanium door behind which was a small room where they were holding hostage his wife.

He opened the door, relying on a doorframe, and smirked looking at his wife, who was sitting on a far corner with her hands bind with a rope behind her. "Well, well China, I can't decide whether I like this bondage game trigger or be worried like a normal husband will."

Deva looked at the man with her eyes wide with shock, but then her expression turned to fury. "Bakaiser you jackass! Where the hell were you all this time? What in the name of Sukobu with this sudden turn of events? Shouldn't this be more dramatic with you coming to save me like a hero and not like this?" Kagura shouted.

Sougo grinned approaching her. "Yeah, yeah. Author was planning on a dramatic turn of events, but too much drama is not Gintama style, so I'll just save you now and then we will get back to the original funny fan fiction."

"Damn you Sadist! If you knew this then why didn't you come to save me earlier? Why did you drag this stupid kidnapping for 4 chapters?" China shouted struggling to get free from the ropes as she stood up.

Bakaiser scratched his chin with interested look. "How strong is that rope to actually be able to hold back a Yato power. Maybe I should take it with me, or maybe buy myself one."

Deva looked at him with empty look. "Why do you need rope for?"

"What do you mean why, China?" He smiled like a devil. "I'm going to use it on my wife later."

"LIKE HELL I'LL LET THAT HAPPEN!" Kagura shouted and struggled to free herself.

Bakaiser kneeled in front of her and embraced her tightly. "Damn you China, do you know how much trouble you caused me?"

Kagura's eyes went wide and she blushed a little. "What are you doing jackass? No one asked your help. Besides you've been taking your sweet time getting here don't you? Probably enjoying yourself."

"It's true that I did take my time, but that was because you were annoying me by flirting around and I didn't know you were kidnapped until recently."

"Don't freaking lie to me! You were the one flirting around while being on so called 'mission'." Kagura shouted.

Sadist sighs. "That was because the man I was searching for is a playboy, so I had to fool those bitches into telling me about him more."

Deva glared at her husband. "Oh, and for that you just had to be 'friendly' with them. I don't believe you Sadist, you don't care for me or your family, so go back to space. Let me go! Don't touch me!" She struggles in her lovers embrace.

Sougo pushed away from her gripping her shoulders tight. He looked right into her sapphire eyes his crimson eyes blazing with annoyance and irritation. "Yeah, you're right China. I travelled through the universe, searching for that bastard to put him away before he fulfills his promise, I had to ask Hijikata and Danna's help, I had to come after you to the past and search all around the Edo for you, killing my way to here to save you, because I don't care. I did all that because I don't give a damn about you China!"

Kagura looked at her Sadist with surprise. Damn it, this guys finally snapped. He almost never snaps. China looked down averting her eyes and mumbled with a slight blush. "Sadist?"

"What?"

"Unbind me."

He removed his hands from her shoulders his poker face back. "Why? So you can hit me, no thank you. Stay like that."

"I… I want to hug you too."

Bakaiser arched a brow, but then smirked moving his hands behind her opening the ropes. "My, my what a cute wife do I have."

"Shut up!" Kagura blushed.

As soon as her hands were free she wrapped her arms around her husband's neck and embraced him tight, he hugged her back while grinning. Suddenly she sigh with relieve, now she felt safe and happy.

"China?" Bakaiser called to her, but Deva only hummed a little as she buried her face in the nape of his neck. "You do remember that today is our little girls birthday, right? We kind of have to be there. But I don't mind us having fun before we go."

"Aoi-chan's birthday?" Kagura shouted with shock, but then realization hit her, in all this mess she actually forgot what day it was. "Damn it Sadist why didn't you say anything. Let me go bastard! I have to be there."

Sadist smirked letting her go. China jumped up and glared at the man.

"Damn it! I haven't even bough a present yet." She runs to the door turning one last time to look at her husband. "Go there and tell Aoi I'll come soon." Kagura shouted and run outside.

Sougo smiled at her innocent idiotic behavior. Then he looked at the surveillance camera on the wall with serious eyes. Bakaiser stand up taking out a paper and read the content one more time. He found this note on the door to this room where Kagura was kept. Damn it all, he knew that something was fishy when it was so easy to get in here.

I suppose this little incident actually proves you Sougo Okita, how powerful I am. You underestimated my powers. I'll let you go for now, but this was just the beginning, so if I were you I would chain myself to everyone important to me.

 

* * *

 

Snack smile.

"Silver Gin-san, where did you disappeared to?" Shinpachi asked as the future yorozuya approached them.

Silver sat down behind the table scratching his head. "Got a call from home. I had to report back."

"Che, why am I such a sissy when I get older. Oi, are sure that you're my future self, maybe you're actually Oogushi-kun, or Shinpachi in disguise." Gin-chan shouted with annoyance.

"What did you say bastard?" Older yorozuya glared at his younger image bumping their heads together and pushing at one another. "Who are you calling a sissy?"

"You of course, you poor replica of Gin-chan." Gintoki pushed back veins popping out on both men's cheeks. "What do you mean report back? Gin-san never reports his action. Are you afraid of your wife? What are you hiding?"

"You're the actual weakling perm head bastard, you can't even face your problems head on." Silver retorted.

"Huh? Aren't you talking about yourself? You're as plain and boring as Shinpachi, where is your radiance of the main hero? Where is the charm that Gin-san possesses? No, no you're just a poor replica of Shinpachi who pretend to be Gin-san."

"OI, WHY ARE YOU USING ME AS A REFERENCE TO SOMEONE USELESS? DO YOU GUYS HATE ME? AM I THAT UNIMPORTANT?" Megane shouted getting pissed off at the two men.

"Anego, is because if haven't had any sukobu in a while that I see two Gin-chan's?" Kagura asked looking at two men fighting with bored look.

Otae smiled. "No, Kagura-chan there really is two Gin-san's."

"Tama…" Yato female turned to green haired robot that was standing not far with Otose and Catherine. "Did you let Leukocyte King out and he grow all of a sudden?"

"No, Kagura-sama. This is Gintoki-sama's future self." Tama answered with her robotic voice.

"As if one idiot, lazy ass Gintoki was not enough now there are two of them." Tsukky commented letting out a long smoke.

"And they seem to hate each other for some reason." Kyuubei added.

Otose also let out a smoke from her cigarette. "They're such idiots that they probably have no idea why they're fighting in the first place."

"I told you to kick that useless bum who doesn't pay rent out and lets open a bar upstairs." Catherine grinned.

Silver let go of Gin-chan, both glaring at cat eared women, who's like a parody on every cat ear character out there. "You wish monster cat. I'm not giving it away to the likes of you."

"Kya~ Two Gin-san's, I'm in heaven!" Sa-chan shouted. She was all red from excitement with smoke coming out of her ears as she was looking from one guy to another. "Which one? Which one?" Her nose started to bleed. "Doesn't matter!"

She jumped at the two yorozuya, but both kicked, sending her flying. Next it was Zura's turn to appear with Elizabeth by his side. He was disguising himself as Captain Katsura and well, as always fooling the Shinsengumi officers. Sougo was too busy shooting at Toushi and the said man charging at the younger one. With Kondo walking behind Otae and getting beaten up, it's not like there was anyone to recognize the Joui leader.

"Leader!" Zura approached Kagura.

"Ah, Zura." China looked at him while holding the piece of sukobu in her mouth.

"Zura ja nai, Katsura dayo~" He corrected her. "I heard that it's your daughters birthday, so I came to celebrate. I'm sure that my invitation got lost in the mail."

Kagura shook her head. "No, we just forget about you."

"Told you." Elizabeth raise the sign, but Zura just cleared his throat leaning over towards the little girl who was sitting in her chair, decorated like a throne. "You must be leader's daughter…"

"Her name is Aoi." Yato girl corrected.

"Happy birthday, I bought you a good present, a better one than dogs of Bakufu could buy for you."

Aoi looked at him with dead fish eyes and pulled his hair. "Zuya~"

"Zuya ja nai, Zura… *Ahem* messed up, I mean Katsura dayo~" Katsura corrected the little girl straightening up with all the females around Aoi giving him empty looks for correcting a child who got all their names wrong, in a cute way.

"Leader we should have this little girl join the Joui, she will be a perfect leader like her mother."

Zura finished and at that both Gintoki's slide towards him hitting him, with their fist, on his head. Gin-chan looked at him annoyed. "To actually ask a Shinsengumi captain's daughter to join the resistance. Zura, is the last bit of your mind got blown out already?"

"Don't bother." Silver scratched his head. "Be it the past or the future this guys is an idiot."

"Humph!" Gin looked at his future self with troll smile. "Well, seeing how idiotic you are, he must be worst than this."

Vein popping out Silver glared at perm head. "I dare you to repeat that again bastard!"

"WHY ARE YOU TWO FIGHTING? AREN'T YOU SUPPOSE TO BE THE SAME PERSON? WHY ARE YOU SO DIFFERENT? WHY YOUR FUTURE SELFS AND PAST HATE EACH OTHER?" Shinpachi shouted getting irritated from two men.

Sougo stopped chasing Hijikata and two Gin-chan's looked at him with the same poker face. "Because they're morons!" And the men returned to their tasks of trying to fight and kill each other as Shinpachi looked at them with empty but annoyed look.

Kagura bite on her sukobu saying. "I don't hate Deva. Why would I hate myself? I actually got cooler as I grow up, besides I'm keeping Bakaiser in the palm of my hand." Kagura smirked.

"Dream on China!" Okita said with deadpanned voice as he switched from Toushi to start a battle with Kagura.

"What's wrong with Aoi-chan?" Seita looked worried at little Sadist Yato and then at his mother who was right beside the two kids.

"Maybe she is upset over something. I mean this is certainly not the party someone would expect for a kid." Tsukky looked around at everyone.

Gorilla's getting beaten up, two Gintoki's fighting and Hijikata joining them, the girl's parents (younger once) fighting. This is indeed chaos.

"I wonder about that." Hinowa gently patted the girl's head with kind smile. "Aoi-chan what's wrong?"

Aoi shook her head as someone called out to her through all the noise. "This is your birthday, so you should enjoy it." Everyone stopped what they were doing to look at Bakaiser who just entered with a smug smile.

As he approached his daughter the little girl smiled brightly and jumped from her place right into his arms. "Papa~" She shouted with happiness.

"Happy birthday Aoi." Sougo adult smiled at his little girl as Aoi hugged him.

"Looks like she's back to normal." Hinowa smiled.

Tsukky let out a smoke nodding. "That's true, this brat might be used to all this scenes, and so she was probably sad from not seeing her parents."

"What do you mean from not seeing her parents? I'm her mother, she should be happy from that." Kagura pouted.

"My, my Kagura-chan, are you jealous of your own future self?" Otae smiled.

"Not really." Kagura glared at Bakaiser.

"Oi, Bakaiser where is Kagura?" Silver asked the man while picking his ear.

Bakaiser turned towards him arching a brow. "Danna? What are you doing in here?"

"Came to pick you up. Did you catch the guy?"

"Nah, he ran away. Bastard is playing with me." Bakaiser hissed frowning.

"Where's mama?" Aoi asked looking at her daddy with cute and innocent blue eyes.

Older man looked down at the little girl in his arms. "Forget her Aoi, she is in…" He didn't get to finish as the sofa came flying towards him, Bakaiser sitting down just in time to dodge it.

Everyone looked at the door this time Deva glaring at her husband. "I dare you finish that sentence Sadist!"

"See Aoi, you don't need a monster mother like that."

This time it was Kagura who attacked Sougo, while Deva prepared her parasol approaching her family.

"Are you out of your mind China? Go attack him if you're angry." Okita said dodging the girl's attacks.

Kagura kept attacking. "It will be you… in the future!"

Deva was annoyed at her Sadist but with Aoi suddenly smiling brightly and jumping in her mother's embrace made the Yato female forget her anger. Aoi snuggled closer, rubbing herself against her mother's chest.

"Happy birthday Aoi-chan. Sorry for being late." China kissed the girl's forehead. "Sadist, give her, her present." She commanded.

"Why should I? And besides present giving will be later."

Kagura glared. "As her parents we should be first." She smiled troll like. "Or did you not buy one. Forgot while playing around, ne Sadist?"

Bakaiser looked at her with poker face and bored eyes. "Don't compare me to yourself China. Aoi, give me your hand."

Taking his daughter's little hand he locked a cute bracelet around her wrist. It was a simple chain like silver bracelet with little green gems decorating the edges.

"Wa~ so cute." Otae said with happiness, Kyuu-chan and all the other females nodding in agreement with a slight blush.

Deva arched a brow. "Hm, you actually have a taste Sadist. Got it from one of the girls you were 'friendly' with?" She asked mocking.

Sadist looked at her annoyed, but then looked back at his little girl. "There is a little legend for this bracelet Aoi. It says that if the owner of the bracelet ever loses her way home, then it will help her find the right way and return safe."

Aoi looked at her new accessory with amazement her eyes shining with happiness. She leaned closer her mother taking a step forward to her husband so she won't fall. Aoi kissed her daddy on the cheek. "Love you Papa~"

He smiled at her and then arched a brow at his wife with smug smile. "Lets see your present China."

Deva glared at him, but when her daughter looked at her she gave an apologetic smile. "Sorry, Aoi-chan, Mama didn't have enough time to buy you a present, so I'll just have to do that later." When Bakaiser smirks she continued with a smile. "But that will be your second present. First is this."

China took out a pretty hairpin from her pocked putting it on her daughter's hair. It looked like a snowflake with six blue gems, same color as her eyes, on the ends.

Aoi's smile brightened as Bakaiser looked surprised. "That hair pin is…" He mumbled.

"Aoi-chan…" Kagura continued. "Promise me to always wear this, ok? Because as long as this is with you Mama and Mitsuba-nee will always watch over you and protect you." Deva smiled.

Aoi nodded with a smile and kissed her mother. "Mama love you~"

"Aneue?" Sougo looked shocked at the Sadistic family and then at the young Yato female beside him.

Kagura looked up at him and frowned. "What are you looking at me for? I never met your sister."

"But she did."

"Then go and ask her." She turned away from him.

As Aoi was hugging both her parents a weird sound resounded through the room.

*Click.*

Everyone looked at each other confused. Somehow knowing what it was and already hearing her patience break Deva put Aoi down, so that girl runs to her young parents.

Older China looked at her left wrist, her bangs covering her eyes. "Sadist, what is this?"

"Hm, can't you tell China? These are called handcuffs." He said with poker face.

Deva shook with fury. "I can see that. Why is it chaining my left wrist to your right wrist?"

"What do you mean why? After all the trouble you caused I'm putting you under surveillance, so you might as well say good bye to your freedom."

"Bakaiser, you Sadistic dumbass!" Deva shouted and attacked her husband. Well, it was much easier to attack and to dodge since they were chained to each other.

Kagura also got annoyed. "Sadist you idiot! What the hell was that?"

"Don't worry China. I won't do it. That would be too gross and disgusting." Sougo replied with poker face.

Kagura put Aoi back on her throne vein popping out on her face as she grabbed her umbrella and attacked her rival being royally pissed.

 

* * *

 

Knock. Knock. A man entered the office. It was a big room with a big T-shaped table in the middle. There was another man with a fox mask sitting behind the table while relaxing and relying back on his chair.

The guy that just entered stood in front of the table bowed a little then looked at his boss. "Sir, Kagura Okita was saved by her husband, they escaped earlier. We lost many man."

Fox mask smirked, well it can't be seen because of the mark, but it could be felt. "I see, so he finally made a move."

"Do you want us to go after them?"

Fox turned his chair looking at the painting on the wall. "No, let them relax and enjoy themselves. Let those naïve idiots think that it's all over, we will attack them when they will be most vulnerable, when they will least expect it." And Fox laughed evil.


	9. You always make a mistake with presents.

Shinpachi sigh, shaking his head. "There they go again. Do they really have to fight every five minutes?"

"They can't help it Patsuan, it's engraved in their blood." Silver answered. "It's like the saying goes that when you like someone you can't help, but bully that person."

"So in the end…" Gintoki took over. "You get so used to fighting or arguing with each other that when it all ends it becomes boring. You get married, then kids and nagging of the mothers that you should be a good role models. Then people that piss you off at work, then before you know it you start to get fat and your wife nags you about getting a proper job with more payment, which you reply with 'Blame the damn, economy. There is no other tax robbing company that will hire a Sadist!' One day you wake up to be bald, and then your wife is bald and then your kids live you to Elderly home and then…."

"STOP DESCRIBING THE MARRIED LIFE IN SUCH FUCKED UP DULL COLORS!" Megane shouted.

"But it is exactly like that, Patchy. Marriage is a prison and when you remember back your beautiful teen days where you used to fight and bully each other like any normal Sadistic kid would, you start to wonder, 'I should have married my hot neighbor'…"

"IT'S NOT TRUE! WHAT ABOUT BEING A SADISTIC KID IS NORMAL? WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY NORMAL?" Shin holds his head in frustration. "Gin-san, please stop, PTA will have our heads for making kids go the wrong way."

"Huh?" Perm head picked his ear with his trademark dead fish eyes. "Don't you see Patsuan? In the future Gin-san's coolness decreases by 99.9%, because I'll start dating. I become such a sissy that it's killing me."

Silver grabbed Gin-chan's collar pulling him close and glaring at him. "Stop calling me a sissy, bastard! I'll fucking kill you! And what do you mean 99.9%, is that even possible. Then what is left of me, huh?"

"Sissy, dull character." Perm head answered with troll smile.

"YOU'RE DEAD YOROZUYA!" And just like the earlier heroes, this two also started their battle.

Left brow twitching with annoyance, Shinpachi sat down sighing. "I won't even bother to find a come back to that."

"You should have ignored them since the beginning." Hijikata said with half closed eyes, looking at the two tiredly while lighting his cigarette.

"But now that I think about it, I really wonder what will happen to us in the future." Hinowa said smiling.

Women looked at each other, Tsukky breaking the silence as she blow out the smoke. "Well, since those two are married and Gintoki have a lover, we should have a pair too."

"I'm definitely still together with Tae-chan in the future." Kyuubei said with a little blush.

Otae smiled. "Of course Kyu-chan, we're friends. But now that I think about it, for the fans sake as well I wonder who Gin-san choose?"

Amazon's stopped looking at two silver haired samurai. Both stopped Gin-chan picking his nose as he moved away leaving the older man to deal with it and he was lazy to stand.

Silver gulped down sweat running down his face. "Did you ladies need something?"

"It's unfair Gin-san, don't you think? Why is it only Kagura-chan and you knowing your future, we have the right to that too, now don't we?"

"W-w-wait, Otae. I can't actually say that right now you know. It will affect the future… Yeah, affect and change. So find out yourselves." Silver was trying desperately to explain moving back as they close in on him.

"Huh?" Catherine said with disgusted face. "It didn't affect those brats as you see they're still as bothersome as ever. Spill it Perm or I'll spill your guts."

Sa-chan jumped at Silver hugging him. "GIN-SAN! IT'S ME RIGHT? IT'S ME? YOU FINALLY REALIZED THAT WE'RE DESTINED TOGETHER AND CHOOSE ME. AAAAHHHH~ WITH YOUR S AND MY M WE ARE THE PERFECT COUPLE… KYA~ I'M GETTING TURNED ON! TAKE ME GIN-SAN! TAKE ME NOW-"

She kept shouting as Silver high kicked her sending her flying. Tsukky looked at him from the corner of her eye. "You wouldn't be as stupid as to date all of us at once again, right?"

Silver's eyes widened as he gulped turning to Gin-chan who was now looking at them with dead fish eyes and drinking. "YOU DAMN BASTARD! HELP ME OUT HERE A BIT!"

"Why should I? This is your mess solve it yourself." Perm head said with bored voice.

Vein popping Silver shouted more. "ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?! IF I DIE YOU'RE DEAD TOO, YOU DAMN CURLY HEAD!" Getting irritated at how his young self was lazy to even reply, he looked at women that were standing killing aura rising.

Damn it! If I tell them about the future, then their future selves will kill me and then play on my grave, if I don't I won't be able to see the next sunlight because past will kill me. Wait, is it really possible for the future to die in past? Is it normal? Will he disappear in the future if he dies here? Will his past self disappear too? Wait then why did I come here if I knew this would happen. It's that woman's entire fault. After I spend so much time getting over all the pests around her, now I'm stuck here when I should be there living through my honeymoon period.

"So Gin-san, do some fan service and tell us, who are you dating, then reveal our wonderful love life secrets to us." Otae smiled.

Silver waved his hand in dismissal. "You guys are Amazons, not all of you got that love life and it's not great."

At that killing aura raise and he cursed his damn tongue for talking without listening to his brain, who was sleeping right now, since it was drunk and his heart is pretty much in trouble since he can't even talk properly with the woman he cares about, since that would reveal a lot more than they need to know. Geez, he was never good with complicated things.

"OTAE-SAN~ I KNOW IN THE FUTURE WE'LL BE TOGETHER UNTIL DEATH DO US APART!" Kondo shouted as he jumped through the air toward Otae.

Anego prepared a bat, but before she could move Silver stepped in front of her pulling her behind him and shouted hitting the Gorilla with his wooden sword, so he flew away. "THEN GO AND DIE ONCE OR TWICE AND NEVER COME BACK! Damn Gorilla, don't touch…" He finished with low voice.

Everyone looked at him half surprised, half just uncaring. Silver samurai gulped down looking around and putting his sword away. Damn reflexes! Now he had some explanation to do.

He turned to Otae trying to talk with his usual uncaring voice, sounding bored and his eyes going dead fish again. He scratched his head. "Geez, well, Shinpachi asked from me to look after you, so that's why… I…. Yeah, it's all Patsuan's fault."

He hoped they believed him, because he himself is not believing any of this crap and Bakaiser looking at him as if saying 'Danna, you suck. Just confess already. Pathetic.' Was so not helping him right now.

Tae looked at him, bat now disappeared, her hand on her cheek as she smiled. "So I'm dating someone and yet I still have Gorilla's around me. I knew it we should castrate him. So, who is it that asked you protect his cute lover?"

"I'll kill him!" Kyuubei said getting jealous. Or maybe… Her eye shined for a second before Silver said.

"It's not you. Don't even start imagining weird things." Kyu-chan frowned her hand on her sword.

"WAKA~ YOU SHOULD ALWAYS STAY FEMINE. WEAR THIS GOTH LOLLY IT SUITS YOU!" Ayumu jumped through the air same fashion as Kondo, but this time, it was Kyuubei herself, that send him flying with a high kick.

"Okay, before everyone kill each other, or so much as drink till death. Lets stop for a while since we have to give the little brat her presents." Otose said letting out a long smoke.

"Everyone please gather around." Tama said through the speaker with robot voice, when none paid attention to the old lady.

Stopping their fights everyone approached them. Sitting Aoi on her throne and everyone gathering around her, both her mommies sat on one side and daddies on the other side from her.

"So how we should do this? There are many of us and there also presents from the future? If we do one by one, we're here till the next morning." Megane asked fixing his glasses as he looked at two Yato females playing with their daughter.

"Hm? Maybe we should make a list or something?" Deva said her thoughts while pursing her lips.

Toushi lit another cigarette interfering. "Iye, it will be faster to just open the presents from the future along with present time. Since it looks like everyone in this room pretty much are together and around this brat in the future, so it's not a problem."

"Good job Toushi! You can always find a way!" Kondo patted his friend on the shoulder.

"Just what you would expect from Followtaka Toushifollow." Gin-chan said with his usual bored dead fish eyes, picking his ear.

"STOP WITH THAT FREAKING JOKE, YOROZUYA! THAT'S OUTDATED YOU STUPID PERM!" Hijikata shouted vein popping on his face.

Perm head got irritated coming face to face with his rival. "Who're you calling an idiot, Oogushi-kun? Do you have problem with my perm? It's not like I wanted this like that you know."

"WHO SAID ANYTHING ABOUT YOUR HAIR, I'M TALKING ABOUT YOUR EMPTY HEAD. AND WHO THE HELL IS OOGUSHI?" Devil vice-commander grabbed Gintoki by his collar, Gin-chan doing the same.

Silver grabbed by the back of their collars and dragged them away from each other. "Calm down, are you in grade school or something?"

"Stay out of this sissy." Gintoki said.

Vein popped at Silver samurai's cheek this time he was the one challenging his younger self. "I said to stop with that name, bastard!"

"Lets ignore them." Shinpachi sigh. "Anyways, Deva-san I think it's better if you and Bakaiser-san open the presents."

"Okay, then I'm starting with the people who are not here." Older Yato female put her hands in the bag and dragged out three presents putting them on the table she started.

Kagura smiled brightly. "I feel like a Santa."

"Really ugly and idiot Santa. Not mentioning the glutton, pig, violent…." Sougo said with bored tone and almost got hit by Kagura.

Deva looked at him with empty eyes and started with the first present.

 

* * *

 

1\. Abuto.

"Ah, its from the mop head." Deva said starting to unwrap the box. "Now lets see. Hope it's something we can sell for a good price."

"No, please don't say that, it's wrong. Don't teach people weird things." Patsuan said troubled.

Deva looked at the content of the box with empty emotionless eyes as she took the book inside it out and pushed the box away.

"So what is it?" Kagura leaned over her eyes also going empty. "Yato tradition and customs book?" China read the cover of the book, with a little surprise on her expression.

"There is a note attached." Sougo took the note reading aloud. "Become a stronger and cuter Yato than your mother and not as idiotic as your uncle, also refrain from being a sadist and lazy idiot. Happy Birthday!"

The gloomy aura fell upon Sadistic family + Silver. The next instant the book was shot, cut, blown from bazooka, exploded and ripped. God knows who did what.

Everyone, don't do this at home! Books shouldn't be burned or get destroyed. Oh and since this is Gintama, after all that "Yato traditions and customs book", was still safe and in whole piece lying on the table.

"AS IF I'LL EVER LET MY CUTE BABY, BE LIKE YOU FREAKING MORONS. GO GET YOUR SELF A GIRLFRIEND, DAMN BLOOD OTAKU!" Deva shouted looking up as if Abuto could see her glare.

"Calm down, China beast! He's probably messing with you." Bakaiser said with deadpan voice. "You did send him 'A Nanny manual for dummies' on his birthday, so he's probably trying to get you irritated.

Deva was glaring at her husband, but then calm down looking at him bored, while nodding. "Ah, you're right. Wonder what I should send him this year."

"Ne, Shinpachi?" Kagura looked at Megane biting on her sukobu. "Who's that guy they just mentioned?"

Patchy looked at her surprised. "Eh? You don't remember? We fought him back in Yoshiwara."

Young Yato female looked at him with empty eyes. "You mean that looser, mop head weakling that my great self beat, who's also my brother's baby sitter and a punch bag for all those elders because he has to cover for baka-nii?"

Drop fall over Shin's head. "No, I think there should be more to his character, except what you mentioned."

"You should stay in good terms with mop head, Kagura-chan." Deva said catching the young girl's attention. "He will come in handy in the future."

Kagura smiled like a troll. "He will help me kill my useless brother?"

This time Deva smiled like a troll. "Iye~ something much more better." And they both snickered like demons.

 

* * *

 

Harusame ship.

Abuto shuddered suddenly stopping on his track. Kamui turned towards him his antenna waving and his usual idiot smile plastered on his face.

"What's wrong? Also want to escape this boring meeting? Lets leave together then." He passed him returning the same way they came.

Abuto put his hand on the man's shoulder pulling him back. "That's not it! If you don't attend this meeting we're done and besides bother to at least show up sometimes. I'm not your substitute for their punching bag."

"It's okay, I'll just kill all of them." Yato boy smiled with the most innocent looking smile, but one should never believe that smile.

Abuto sighs, following his captain to the meeting room. "Don't go off trying to kill everything that moves."

What was that feeling just now? It felt like someone is plotting something devilish behind me. Which means more trouble. Abuto thought.

 

* * *

 

2\. Umibozu.

"Look this one if from that bald alien killer." Sougo said with poker face.

Kagura's eyes go wide in surprise as she grabbed the box away from the Sadist. "Form pappy? What did he send?" She started to unwrapping the present.

Deva yawned. "If I were you I wouldn't get my hopes up. Oh wait I am you! How strange."

She first happily opened the present, but then young Yato girl's face went emotionless and her eyes empty.

"Start to take care of your hair, or you will go bald. P.S If it works tell me, so I can use it too." Okita read the note.

China stood up. "Ne, Sadist? Give me your bazooka."

"Huh?" Sougo handed her the weapon before continuing with his usual bored voice. "Whatever you're doing, make sure to hit Hijikata-san along with it."

"DON'T GET ME INVOLVED IN THIS, YOU BASTARD!" Devil vice-commander shouted anger marks all over him.

Kagura dropped the bottle inside the bazooka, opened the window, and aimed at the sky and shoot at it while shouting. "EAT YOUR GODDAMN MEDICINE YOURSELF, USELESS POOR EXCUSE FOR A FATHER."

"NANI?! STOP THROWING AWAY THE PRESENTS YOU DON'T LIKE, WHEN THEY'RE NOT EVEN YOURS."

"She's my daughter and since I give birth to her those presents are also mine." Deva and Kagura said in unison.

Shin looked at them with empty eyes. "I can't even begin to describe how wrong is that logic of yours."

 

* * *

 

Some bar on far away planet, Umibozu was sitting alone drinking something.

Suddenly out of nowhere something hit him hard enough to almost hurt him. Umibozu turned around looking at the crowd while shouting with vein popping out. "WHICH ONE OF YOU WEAKLINGS DID THIS? DO YOU WANT TO DIE BASTARD?"

"N-n-n-n-no one of people is crazy enough to do that sir. We don't want to get killed yet." Barmen said with troubled expression trying calm him down.

Still angry and furious Baldy looked down spotting the little bottle. "Eh? What's this?"

Universes number 1 hair growth shampoo. Just use it two times and you will see the effect, 100% guaranty.

Umibozu read the label getting interested and after checking for no one to see, he put the medicine in his pocket and walked to the door acting cool.

"Already leaving, sir?" Waiter smiled politely.

Baldy looked at him side ways, trying to sound cool. "I have an important mission, I'll be fighting for death, and such a busy man who protects the world can't spend his days in leisure and laziness. That's what a man have to do." Mission of growing my hair back on, ok this time it has to work.

And instead of an important mission he walked towards the little hotel to take a shower with his new found, maybe a savior for his baldhead shampoo.

 

* * *

 

3\. Kamui.

Kagura looked at the box in her hands and then at her older self, back to box and returned her stare at Deva. With empty eyes she said. "Oi, why is my idiot brother is sending a present to Aoi-chan? And with the note that says, 'I'll kill your parents for leaving with you when I had to take you away on a vacation. Enjoy your life Aoi-chan; soon I'll be coming for you. Happy birthday!'"

Deva sigh with the same bored eyes. "He did that last year too. Geez, since the first time he meet Aoi, that guy send her presents, be it a Christmas, Valentine's Day (that doesn't have anything to do with him though. He should just go and give his chocolates to that mop head) and all the other holidays and birthdays."

Bakaiser took the box opening it. "Even if he doesn't look like it and constantly trying to kill me and Danna, but nii-chan actually adores Aoi. First time he saw her, he went all child like and that idiotic smile turned innocent as he said."

Bakaiser put on mask with Kamui's smiling face drawn on it. "As soon as she learns how to walk and talk I'll be taking her away. I'll be her master and make her strong like myself. So enjoy your short years with her."

"LIKE HELL I'LL EVER GIVE MY CUTE DAUGHTER TO THAT IDIOT!" Deva shouted ripping the mask with couple of veins on her face.

Kagura frowned. "Oi, oi, since when did I get on such good terms with my brother, so that he was allowed to get close to my sweet little girl?"

"We're not on good terms, I still hate his guts. And him being as much sadistic as this two morons, he like to play around and bully, but the only one he's kind too is Aoi. Besides she seems to like him a lot too."

"But he started to visit us and stopped hunting me as much as before after that incident right?" Bakaiser asked.

Deva looked at him surprised for a moment, but then nodded. "Yeah, it will happen in two years right?"

"What will happen?" Sougo asked.

"Many, many things. Right Gin-chan?"

Vein popped on Silver's cheek. "Don't remind me of that! I have to go through so much trouble because of that psycho and Bakasugi. And it was all because of you Kagura. Ah~ I should have killed him when I had the chance back then. Or more like, will have a chance in two years." He turned to Gin-chan. "Oi, stupid perm, kill him then!"

"Not interested." Gin-chan picked his nose.

"You can't do that Gin-chan. If you kill him then Gin fans and Kamui fans are going to start a war against each other." Kagura said biting on her sukobu as she gives Aoi the now opened box with her uncle's present.

"I wonder who will win?" Deva asked wondering.

"Oi, Kagura? What is it brat is playing with?" Silver frowned looking at Aoi.

Little girl was still sitting oh her place ignoring her surrounding and playing with cute little pink umbrella with white flowers on it.

"Ah, that's baka-nii's present." Deva said.

Kagura arched a brow. "He actually has a taste. It's cute."

"Um, Kagura… Your brother's present?" Silver asked uncertain and when both China's nodded blue lines going down his face he said. "Then… Then that thing is…"

But before he could finish his thought Aoi pressed the button on the handle of the parasol and shot, but she didn't loose her grip on the weapon moving it around making everyone jumped from one way to another. Finally Deva jumped in taking the little parasol and smiling at her daughter.

"Aoi-chan, I'll keep this until the next time we see your uncle, ok? Then use it on him." Her bangs covered her eyes as she mumble. "I'll kill that freaking idiot."

 

* * *

 

4\. Yagyu Kyuubei + Kyu-chan (future).

"Eh? Kyuubei's present is not here." Bakaiser said shrugging as his wife glared at him.

Silver scratched his head approaching them. "It's not in the box, or more like it couldn't be put inside the box. We can't afford to actually have a animal protection federations coming for us as well." He took out a picture and handed in to Deva.

"A picture?" Kagura frowned as all the heads leaned over Deva looking at the image she was holding.

There was Kyu-chan, 5 years in the future, wearing a cute mini kimono, her hair bind in twin ponytail and there were two monkeys sitting on either of her shoulder. She was smiling bring with a slight blush.

"Kya~ Kyu-cha you're so cute!" Otae hugged her with happiness.

Kyuubei blushed shaking her head furiously. "No, no, no, no! That can't be me. I'm going to become a man. That's a Photoshop!"

"WAKA~" Ayumu cried with his nose running as he was filming with his camera.

"Who could have though that miss I want a tower of Babel, will be cute like that in the future." Gin-chan picked his ear.

Tsukky nodded blowing out smoke. "Oi, Silver don't you have any picture of me? I want to see my future too."

"Ah, me too. Show me Gin-san." Otae smiled letting go of Kyuubei.

Catherine looked at him disgusted. "Hurry up, useless bum show us our older version.

Silver shakes his head. "You're still as ugly as ever cat parody!"

"Yes, show us." Kondo nodded finally back.

"Hurry up Yorozuya." Hijikata said pissed.

"WHAT AM I A PHOTOBOOK?" Older Yorozuya shouted.

"Look there is a note behind the picture." Kagura pointed and Deva turned the paper around reading.

"Dear, Aoi-chan. Happy Birthday! Since you're in the past I can't give your present to you just yet. But I'm sending the picture, so that you will now I didn't forget. You will get it upon your return. This little cute monkey beside Jugem is your present his name is:

Jugem - Jugem Shit-tossing the Life of Shin-chan's two-day-old underwear Balmung Fezalion Issac Schneider 1/3 True love 2/3 Hangnai Anxiety Betrayal Knows My Name or Does it Really Ignore calls Squid Dogfish Halibut trout Cod Dogfish This is a different Dogfish I'm talking about The Dogfish Shark Kaluga Angler Ray Yuuteimiyaoukimukou Pepepepepepepepepepepepe Runny Diarrhea…. The 2nd!"

"THE HELL?" Megane as always broke down. "WHY IS THIS NAME STILL USED AS A GANG EVEN AFTER 5 YEARS? WHY WAS THE ONLY NEW THING WAS THAT 'THE 2ND' PART? ITS TOO FREAKING LONG FOR A CHILD TO ACTUALLY SAY IT!'

"Oh but I think. Jugem - Jugem Shit-tossing the Life of Shin-chan's two-day-old underwear Balmung Fezalion Issac Schneider 1/3 True love 2/3 Hangnai Anxiety Betrayal Knows My Name or Does it Really Ignore calls Squid Dogfish Halibut trout Cod Dogfish This is a different Dogfish I'm talking about The Dogfish Shark Kaluga Angler Ray Yuuteimiyaoukimukou Pepepepepepepepepepepepe Runny Diarrhea…. The 2nd is indeed a great name." Deva said nodding and showing the picture to her daughter.

Bakaiser patted his Aoi's head. "Yeah, Jugem - Jugem Shit-tossing the Life of Shin-chan's two-day-old underwear Balmung Fezalion Issac Schneider 1/3 True love 2/3 Hangnai Anxiety Betrayal Knows My Name or Does it Really Ignore calls Squid Dogfish Halibut trout Cod Dogfish This is a different Dogfish I'm talking about The Dogfish Shark Kaluga Angler Ray Yuuteimiyaoukimukou Pepepepepepepepepepepepe Runny Diarrhea…. The 2nd suits him."

Kagura pout. "Well, since name makes a person she have to call him Jugem - Jugem Shit-tossing the Life of Shin-chan's two-day-old underwear Balmung Fezalion Issac Schneider 1/3 True love 2/3 Hangnai Anxiety Betrayal Knows My Name or Does it Really Ignore calls Squid Dogfish Halibut trout Cod Dogfish This is a different Dogfish I'm talking about The Dogfish Shark Kaluga Angler Ray Yuuteimiyaoukimukou Pepepepepepepepepepepepe Runny Diarrhea…. The 2nd."

"But since it's too long for her, let her call him whatever she likes." Sougo completed.

"Aoi-chan, we will introduce you to your new friend, his name is Jugem – Jugem Shit-tossing the life of Shin-chan's two-day-old underwear…"

"STOP IT ALREADY?! DON'T REPEAT HIS NAME EVERY TIME IT'S TOO FREAKING LONG! THIS CHAP IS GOING TO END!"

(Ah, this is so tiring to do this one by one, so lets just fast-forwards through the presents shall we? I'm too lazy to drag this chap for another week just for presents.)

Patchy looked at the camera with empty eyes. "Is it even okay, for you to say that?"

 

* * *

 

Fast-Forward.

(F-means Future; P-means present time.)

(F) Hijikata – Mayo bottle shaped bazooka. (Does he want to commit suicide or what?)

(P) Hijikata – Little bell like necklace around her neck with chip that will make noise when she is close by.

(P) Kyuubei – Little katana, with pink sheath.

(F) Otae &Gin-chan – cute pink kimono and Coupons for one month of free Bargain dash and Parfait all you can eat in new café.

(P) Otae – Book "Men are born to serve women" "How did Eve made Adam her slave" and "Manual on how to make men obey you."

(P) Gin – His jump collection and also a coupon for 10 wishes Gin-san will grant for you.

(F-P) Madao – "Manual on how to find yourself a job even if you're a useless old man." Book "The ways of living like Madao" and "How to escape being a Madao" (For your information those books were burned and Madao beaten up.)

(P-F) Zura (Katsura) – Elizabeth plush toy, Joui admission paper, manual "How to become a great Joui", Rap song "Joui is the Joy", Book "The hundred best ways to destroy the Bakufu and its dogs." (Burned!)

(F) Shinpachi – Terekado Tsu new album "Lullaby's can XXX"

(P) Shinpachi – Tsu Terekado new album "Your neighbor got a XXX"

(F) Kondo – Gorilla plush toy with IPod attached.

(P) Kondo – "Manual for Dummy Stalkers. The best ways to get the person you love."

(It was burned down and cut by shreds by Bakaiser. With words: "I'll kill every freaking man who dares to get close to my daughter!"

Deva looked at him with empty eyes. "You're talking like my father when he first learned about us."

"Don't compare me with the baldy. I won't go easy on anyone."

Older China sighs, looking at her smiling daughter. "You're lucky that you have mommy and Anego with others on your side Aoi-chan, or I pity every man that laid his eyes on you. Since Kamui-nii said the same words as this idiot, when I mentions this before.")

(F) Tsukky – Cute dress with hair clippers shaped like little kunai.

(P) Tsukky – Real kunai + Manual "How to be cooler than a main character."

(F) Yamazaki & Tama – Badminton bat.

(P) Yamazaki – Badminton bat and free admission to courses for badminton.

(P) Tama – little walking and talking robot doll.

(F) Sa-chan – Gin-chan's plush toy, and "How to become a great S. Manual for Dummies."

(P) Sa-chan - Cute pajamas with Gintoki's pictures and "How to become a great M to please your S. Manual for dummies."

(F) Takasugi – "Hundred ways to destroyed the world" +

(F) Kihietai - "Hundred and one way to become a villain who everyone admire."

(F) Mutsu – "How to deal with idiots." + "Perfect plan's for killing the captain and being cooler than him."

(F) Tatsuma – Little ship that auto-flies, but it didn't work.

(F) Soyo-hime – A little cute emerald colored princess kimono, with a little crown.

(F) Nobume – Little Mimawarigumi uniform for girls and coupon for three-moth worth of donuts. (With the note that she will take Aoi there personally.)

(F) Sasaki Isaburo – Little phone, at first it seemed like a toy, but as soon as it opened Isaburo started texting her. It ended with Hijikata and Gin-chan breaking the thing and giving her the toy one.

 

* * *

 

Kagura breathed out with exhaustion. "Geez, there still so many to go. Lets take a break."

"Sure, just let me open this one." Deva opened the box she was holding.

It was a present from Gengai, a cute little blue mallet, she smiled and Gin it to Aoi to play with it.

"That bastard sending something normal. I don't believe him." Bakaiser looked at the present with disgust.

"Oh, here is the note. 'Meet Magic mallet Z-second generation. It become cooler and does more than just mere shrinking, this doesn't do it at all. But be careful with it. Happy Birthday!"

"Aoi-chan, you should be careful with that. Just hit Sadist if you want to play." Kagura smiled and she leaned closer towards the little girl.

Aoi smiled happily and then with a single swing using all her power (well, thank god she was a child, so her yato power is still not so great), she hit the mallet on Kagura's head.

*Puff*

Suddenly a little cloud appeared and when it was gone, Yato female was not there, but instead Aoi was still smiling and playing with her new found toy. Everyone looked at the empty spot China occupied a second ago, having this urge to kill the bastard old man.

 

* * *

 

Kagura woke up slowly the next morning not really understanding what happened. The last thing she remembers is a party for Aoi's birthday and little girl hitting her with mallet, and then she doesn't remember anything.

There was a sound of singing birds, nice smell of food and clear air that filled her lungs completely. China opened her eyes to see the unfamiliar ceiling. This room was big, which only meant she was not in yorozuya or anywhere she knew for that matter.

"Oi, are you awake? *Poke* Have you died? *Poke* did you open your eyes to say good-bye to your useless life? *Poke* Just hurry up and die, I want my room back." Someone said with annoyingly deadpanned voice as he kept poking her cheek.

Getting annoyed Yato female sit up suddenly glaring at the little boy, just a little younger than her. "STOP POKING ME BASTARD!"

Kagura froze as she finally started putting images together and actually realizing who was it in front of her. The young boy had sand colored hair and crimson red eyes that she could never forget or mistake with anyone else. Kagura gaped at the little boy beside her with horror filled face.

"Aneue, weird, homeless China girl is awake."

Little boy with sand hair called out, as he was still staring at the vermilion haired girl with bored expression.

How in the world did this happen?! Kagura shouted in her thoughts.


	10. The best way to learn about someone is his past, so if you don't have pictures just go back in time.

For the first time in her life Kagura was sitting formally, her legs bend under her, back straight and hands on her knees as she looked at the four people sitting beside and in front of her in the same room. One of them was someone she has never met before, but apparently this woman, with gentle smile and same features as Sadist, was her rival's sister.

But what bothered her was not that, it was the other three men sitting in front of her and looking at her. She knew who they are, China knows it pretty well, but she's just not able to cope with their past looks, yet.

Apparently the present that Gengai send to Aoi work well and now Yato girl was in the past. But it was not just any past; it was Mayora, Gorilla and Sadist's past. Sadistic Captain is actually younger than her right now, which is good, Mayora has a long hair, well he is still frowning though and Gorilla… well Gorilla is… Gorilla is a Gorilla, like always.

"Oh, I see, so you came from the future Kagura-chan, how exciting." Mitsuba smiled at Kagura gently.

"Haha…" Kondo laughed hands crossed over his chest. "Isn't this great Mitsuba-dono, maybe we should ask her to tell us something?

"I'M NOT A FORTUNETELLER YOU *beep* FOR A BRAIN GORILLA." China shouted.

"No, we shouldn't trust this brat, she doesn't look like someone from the future. More likely she is a trouble maker." Hijikata said with calm, but somehow annoyed face at Yato girl.

Toushi was sitting on the furthest corner and relying on the wall while holding his sword put vertically, his frown as always on his face.

Kagura's left brow twitched as she jumped up shouting. "SHUT UP YOU DAMN MAYORA! WHAT'S WITH THAT DAMN LOOK? WHY DO YOU HAVE A LONG HAIR? ARE YOU A GIRL? WERE YOU A WOMAN BEFORE? DID YOU DO AN OPERATION? YOU SHOULD TELL KYUUBEI ABOUT IT SHE WILL BE HAPPY!"

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU BLABBERING ABOUT, BASTARD? I'LL KILL YOU!" Toushi shouted jumping up with more anger marks on his face.

"Now, now Toushi calm down. She is a kid and she is probably a little scared for suddenly being here." Kondo smiled troubled trying to calm his friend down.

"You're not the one to talk Gorilla." She looked at him with annoyance. "WHAT THE HELL IS WITH THAT LOOK? YOU'RE ALREADY IDIOT, STALKER AND UGLY LOOKING IN THE FUTURE, BUT RIGHT NOW… You're… You're…. YOU LOOK MORE LIKE A GORILLA THAN EVER!"

Gloomy aura fell upon past Gori as he was trying to hold back his tears while mumbling. "I'm sure she is just scared… I know she didn't want to say those words… She is just a kid…"

"Oi, China girl is that how you talk with someone who's trying to be nice to you." Little Sougo said with poker face looking up at her.

"YOU'RE THE LAST PERSON TO TALK, SADIST!" China shouted at the guy. "WHY DO YOU LOOK SO CUTE? WHY DO YOU ACT CUTE? WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOUR CHARACTER? WHAT HAPPENED TO THIS BOY THAT HE BECAME THE IDIOT PRINCE SADIST IN THE FUTURE?" Kagura finished with frustration, but then glared at them as she said. "Honestly, did you suddenly go through a genetic change as soon as you reached Edo or something? What the hell happened to you?"

Mitsuba chuckled. "You're so lively Kagura-chan, but I think you should calm down and explain to us something, right?"

Kagura stopped looking at the sand haired girl and sit down somehow not having any intention to argue.

"Now then since Kagura-chan will be our guest for a while, we should treat her well, ok?"

"Leave it to us Mitsuba-dono, right Toushi?"

Hijikata rubbed his neck. "Whatever."

"I'll treat her well, Aneue." Sougo smiled at his sister.

Mitsuba smiled back at her younger brother and stood up. "Good then, I'll go make some tea, so we can have a long nice chat."

As soon as the said girl left, Kagura slapped her hands against the table coming face to face with Sougo and glaring at him. "Who the hell are you, bastard? Who are you trying to fool? What the hell did you do to my rival?"

Sadist returned the stare. "Is your head ok, idiot? I don't know what you mean by calling me a Sadist or telling that I'm acting, but do that again in front of my sister and I'll kill you."

Kagura showed trolls smile. "Oh, so you have a sister complex, huh Sadist? And here I thought why you remind me of my baka-nii."

Sougo jumped over table trying to hit her, but she just dodged it like he always does when she gets angry and attacks. "Don't even try Sadist, you're a weakling. In the future I always beat you up and you run home crying. Now I'm older than you and way cooler."

"In your dreams, dumbass!" He grabbed a wooden sword jumping her and Kagura pulled out her parasol starting a battle.

Well, it was not their usual battle, since she was holding back, because he was a brat. But it kind of made her happy, not only the fact that they would end up as rivals be it the past or the future, but the simple fact that she is able to break that poker face of his so easily right now. Whatever happened to him in the future made him the way she knows him, King of Planet Sadist, but right now he is a "Sadist in Development", so she might as well use it.

In a second they were in the garden, this battle was childish, since there weren't any high kicks, bazookas or bullets, but it was a simple sword… well, more like sword and parasol battle.

"Haha… they get along pretty well…" Kondo laughed as he and Toushi watched the battle.

"What part of it looks like they get along. With them like this I'm sure that future is hell… for me." Hijikata bites down his lip glaring at them.

Gorilla patted his friend on the shoulder. "Oh, Toushi, don't tell me you're jealous because Sougo is now more interested in her than fighting you."

"Like hell! Let them just kill each other."

Sougo tripped Kagura jumping on her to hit, but she quickly shifted changing their positions. She crashed little Sadist down and pointed her umbrella at him when he tried to stand up. "I win!"

Okita smirked. "Of course, since you can only defeat me when I'm younger than you. I'm sure in the future it's you who's always under me, ne China?"

Vein popping out on her forehead she wanted to shoot, but suddenly realizing that he won't be able to dodge, she instead swing her umbrella trying to hit him, but he reflected her attack with his wooden sword and jumped back preparing to attack.

"Not bad for a brat. Well, I would expect no less from my rival." China smirked.

He arched a brow. "I don't understand why you keep calling me your rival. You're so weak that there is no way I'll ever recognize you as one. Are you a stalker of some kind?" This time it was the little Sadist smirking.

"I'll kill you, Sadist!" Getting more annoyed she jumped attacking. Honestly, how in the world does he always manage to piss her off?

"Sou-chan? Kagura-chan?" Mitsuba called from inside the room and in a minute both kids stopped their fight instead both standing straight beside each other facing the house like two soldiers standing in front of their general with their weapons hidden behind them.

Mitsuba came out to the garden. "Oh, what are you doing in there?"

"I was showing her around, Aneue." Sougo smiled throwing his sword to the pool and running to his sister.

Kagura shook her head and approached the two as well. "Did you need something Mitsuba-nee?"

"Oh, right, I was going to go shopping, so I wanted to ask if you two would like to keep me a company? Besides, it a good chance to show you around, right Kagura-chan?" Sand haired girl smiled.

Both nodded, but as soon as Mitsuba turned around, they glared at each other. "Get off China, it's my time alone with Aneue, don't drag along, idiot!"

"Go to hell Sadist! She wants to show me around, it means you're on the way." Kagura stick her tongue out running after the Okita female, Sougo following.

 

* * *

 

Market place.

"So Kagura-chan, tell me a little about the future." Mitsuba asked smiling as the trio was walking in the market place.

Kagura looked up at the sky considering. "Well, I pretty much said everything. I'm the Queen of Kabuki-cho, everyone love and respect me. I'm strong and cute, so I'm the main heroine of Gintama. Plus, I have an Anego who keeps all the men around her, especially Shinsengumi in fear."

"Boss Lady? What an interesting person?" Sand haired girl ask.

"Yeah, Anego is really cool and strong. And she is really number one Boss Lady. I want to be as strong as her when I grow up." China's eyes shined with enthusiasm.

Mitsuba chuckled. "I would like to meet that Anego of yours once. She seems like an interesting person."

"Don't believe her Aneue." Sougo cut in. "She is obviously lying. How can an annoying brat be the queen of something and beside's there is no way that kind of woman even exists, no one can keep Shinsengumi in fear especially if I will be in it in the future."

Kagura glared at her young rival. "But she does exist Sadist and you fear her no less than others. That idiot Gorilla commander of yours is in love with her and is stalking her, you're always trying to kill Mayora to take his place, so if not for those time killing traits of Shinsengumi that Gorilla-sensei puts on only because yorozuya is finished with cool stuff and there is some remaining pages, you guys won't appear for almost 15 episodes and no one even notice."

Vein popped on Sougo's face. "It's just that sick imagination of your working China bastard! There is no way those kinds of things are possible. Kondo-san is not a stalker and I don't try to kill Hijibaka, yet."

"YOU JUST CALLED HIM HIJIBAKA! AND WHAT DO YOU MEAN 'YET', SO YOU'RE ACTUALLY PLANING IT? Who are you trying to fool bastard? As soon as your sister turns her back, you take out a bazooka and shoot." Kagura shouted.

"I don't have a bazooka, dumbass." Okita retorted back.

"You will!"

"Kagura-chan, Sou-chan, you're too loud." Mitsuba said from way behind them standing in front of the stand with fruits.

"Sorry." China sticks out her tongue to her little rival and run towards the Okita female. "Do you need help, Mitsuba-nee?"

"Tch." Sougo clicks his tongue with annoyance as he scratches his head. "I need to teach her a lesson she will never forget."

As Okita Sougo jr. was thinking that, three men catch his eye. They were obviously some punks from the gang that's been going around their town and scaring everyone, well there was nothing for him to fear since these guys are just scum and weakling, but he could think of a good way to use them.

As a little brat who has yet to actually meet Kagura and learn of her Yato side then become her rival, he didn't know what he was doing. Well, revenge is sweet, so who cares.

Okita smirked and approached the said men. The punks glared at him as Sougo looked at them with innocent, curious eyes.

"Ne, nii-chan, that girl with orange hair…" He pointed towards Kagura who was standing in front of another stand away from Mitsuba. "She said that you good and cool onii-chan's are jerks, idiots, morons, pedo's and that if she had a dog who gave birth to ugly hybrid and who also gave birth to even more ugly hybrid and then she gave birth to one eye, one leg, one ear puppy, she would not let you even close to it. And that you smell bad, oh and most important your dressing style, is disgusting."

"Huh?" The three leaned over him with fake gangster faces.

"It's all her, I like you. I think I will be a gang member like you onii-chan, too." Sougo said deadpanned with fake smile of excitement.

His plan was a success he realized when those three idiot punks walked towards Kagura. They surround her smirking. "Ne, Ojou-chan, we heard you have been saying some pretty nasty things about us."

"Who the hell are you, brat, to badmouth us, huh?" One of the men made a gangster face coming onto China girl.

Kagura arched a brow at them wanting so bad to beat them up, but decided not to bother with this weaklings, since it will cause trouble for Mitsuba. She waved her hand in dismissal as she said with bored voice, just like Gin-chan.

"Go away, punks. I don't have time for you. Go play somewhere else." Yato girl looked at their hairstyle and snickered. "Or kill your barber."

"What did you say?" The young girl's arrogance annoys the three as one of them grabbed her collar. "Want to die, bitch? Do you know who we are?"

China looked at them with dead fish eyes; she was imitating Gintoki and pretty good too. "Don't know, don't care. But is picking on innocent little girls is a hobby of yours? Disgusting." She raised her hand to her mouth and fake shouts. "Help~, help~ this perverts are kidnapping me."

"Shut up!" They shouted realizing the deadly stares of the people.

"You shouldn't get involved with people like that Kagura-chan, it's wrong for a lady." Mitsuba smiled at her as she was now standing beside the Yato girl.

"You're right, Mitsuba-nee. This guys are not even worth my attention."

Getting more annoyed one of them shouted. "Don't you dare to look down at us!?" And the three charged.

"Damn it! Aneue!" Sougo shouted, not expecting his sister for his sister to be involved. He wanted to run towards them to interfere, but before he even moved the punks were already beaten up by one and only Kagura.

Kagura put her umbrella over her shoulder looking down and unconscious bodies. "Don't underestimate the Queen of Kabuki-cho, bastards!"

"Kagura-chan you're really strong." The sand haired girl smiled.

"Of course, Anego says that women has to take care of themselves. Men are useless and we don't need them." China smiled superior.

"I hope I meet your Anego one day, she is quite an interesting person." Then the older sister looked at her brother who was looking at them with a little surprised face. "Why are you standing there Sou-chan? Lets go."

The two girls walked away, with China sticking her tongue out to Sadist as she passed by.

Damn it! That bastard knew it was I! The young boy thought.

"If you want to defeat her, you'll need a better plan than that." Someone with a deadpanned voice, that reminded his own spoke from behind.

Little Sougo turned around to see a young man with sand hair and crimson eyes, same as his, wearing a Shinsengumi uniform standing behind him. The guy scratched his head looking down at the boy with poker face. "I can't believe I was such an idiot when I was a brat. Is this what Bakaiser feels when he sees me?" Sadist said looking at his younger image, which was staring at him with pissed eyes.

"Who the hell are you?" Sougo demanded.

Sadist smirked. "I'm you fairy God mother, and I'll help you to defeat that girl."

"Why?" Okita asked suspicious.

Another grin came from Sadistic captain. "Because I can't let an idiot like you to ruin my reputation as her rival and as a King of Sadists."

 

* * *

 

Back to present.

Bakaiser was sitting in some café eating his Udon, when someone sat on the table behind him. Feeling the kill intend from that person, Sougo grabbed his sword ready to draw when man said while smirking.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you, Sougo Okita. If we start our little battle here, those innocent children celebrating their birthday or that couple, everyone in here might get hurt. You wouldn't want that right?" Fox smirked when he realized that Sougo actually did look around the café realizing that it was full.

Putting his sword back he returned to eating his Udon. "You have some guts to show up like this behind me. I can kill you right now."

Fox smirked. "But you won't right, Sougo Okita? First of all you want to know what I'm planning, as a man who's past, present and future I have learned, I know that you're not going to do anything unless that gives you a benefit. Second, being a good guy character, in your own twisted way, you wouldn't dare to fight in here and hurt innocent people, so that it will ruin your reputation."

"What do you want?" Okita asked with annoyance.

"I want to play a game with you. Same game that you played on me."

Sougo smirked looking from the side of his eye towards the man. "A game? Are you really that stupid to challenge me again or did you forget what happened the last time?"

Fox grinned. "I'm just as much stupid as you're since you left me alive even after everything that I did." Sougo twitched in his place and the man continued.

"Everything is different now Fox."

"I know, I know." The masked man shrugs. "That's why I want to play this little game with you. If you win, I'll disappear, but if you lose…" He smiled like a devil. "Look under your table."

Frowning with suspicion Bakaiser searched under the table with his hand not moving from his spot and being on guard against his enemy sitting right behind him. Spotting a convert stuck on his table he tear it off and opened it. There was a picture as he set his sight on the image Bakaiser's eyes grew wide and he turned around fast with fury drawing his sword and ready to cut the man in two.

"Are you going to risk her life by doing this?" Fox smiled stopping Sougo by raising his finger in "wait" sign. After taking another sip from his coffee the man stood up and turned to his enemy with an evil smile. "If you so much as touch me, I'll order my men to kill her for sure this time and then the bomb in this café will go off. I will escape, but you and those children, I don't think so."

Okita gripped his sword tighter hardly holding himself from cutting the man as he glared at Fox with mask with fury. "I'll kill you, bastard! Let her go!"

"I will, if you win. I'm giving you exactly 36 hours, that will start…" Masked man looked at his watch. "In 15 minutes. If you're able to find and kill me by then, then all is good, you're a hero. You, your wife and little sadist daughter will live happily ever after together, but if not… History will repeat itself."

Fox started to walk away. "Back then it was you who took away everything that was important to me, this time I'll destroy everything that you love, Sougo. I'll show you what hell really looks like." The said villain left the café.

As the door closed behind the Fox, in fury Sougo swing his sword with some much anger that he cut the table and the seats in one slash. "DAMN JACKASS! I should have killed him when I had a chance!" Bakaiser gritted his teeth.

His phone ring, Okita sigh calming down a little and sheathing his sword, since people all around him were so scared they were ready to call the police and he so much didn't wanted to deal with any more idiots right now. He took out his phone from his pocket and answered already knowing whom it was.

"Nii-chan, you're just on time. Looks like we have a problem in our hands, the kind that you will enjoy."

Kamui talked smiling. "The kind with lots of killing and blood, sounds fun. So what is the problem?"


	11. Rivals are always rivals. Be it the past, present or future.

Kagura walked exhausted and tired towards the house and not bothering to take off her shoes she lays on the wooden veranda unable to move.

"My, my Kagura-chan, sorry for making you walk all around the town with me. You must be tired." Mitsuba stood near the girl with worried look.

"It's okay, Mitsuba-nee I wanted to go sight seeing anyways." China girl waved her hand trying her best to sound convincing. Damn it! What the hell is wrong with this town? Anywhere she went there were more and more people trying to attack her. Fighting while making sure that Mitsuba-nee doesn't see her was hard. It's definitely his fault…

Little Sougo stepped on her, knocking the air out of her. "Move away China, you're blocking the way."

"DAMN YOU, SADISTIC BASTARD!" Yato girl sit up throwing the boy off of her, but Sougo just turned in the air and landed on his feet. "Whose fault do you think it is that I am tired like this?"

Young Okita looked at her with poker face. "Eh? Whatever do you mean?"

Veins popping out on her forehead Kagura grabbed her umbrella approaching the boy. "I'll kill you Sadist and then I will leave happily without you around."

"Are you sure you can do that China?" Someone whispered in her ear blowing in it.

Slightly blushing, but more with annoyance Kagura jumped away tuning around to see her real rival, Sougo Okita. "SADIST?"

Sadist smirked. "I see that you're happy to see me. Since you're probably bored to play with that little idiot."

"Who are you calling a little idiot?" Sougo glared at himself from the future.

Kagura grinned pointing her umbrella at King of Sadists. "I knew that there was something fishy, since this little brat is not smart enough for all those tricks."

"Glad you liked them." Sadist stepped closer unsheathing his sword. "Stand back brat and watch what a real fight looks like, since you've shamed me with that pity fight from last chap." Those words made young Okita glare with hatred at his other self.

"Past or future, they all seem to hate the current you, Sadist." China said with sarcasm.

With no other word said they charged at each other, but before their weapons could clash in a battle gentle voice called out. "Sou-chan? Kagura-chan?"

Mitsuba was standing at the veranda just few feet away from them, with her usual gentle smile on. "My, how surprising there are two Sou-chan's?" Female Okita started to walk towards trio.

Sheathing his sword back Sadist turned towards his sister his poker face turning cute smiling one with a little blush as he said with little brother like cute, polite voice. "Good day Aneue! How are you doing?"

Kagura looked at him with empty eyes and then said with annoyance. "Dare~? Who the hell are you bastard? And what have you done to my rival?"

"Shut up, China! If you say something weird to my sister, I'll kill you!" King of Sadists whispered making sure that his sister didn't hear.

Yato girl looked at the young Sougo who was right beside them and he had the same gentle, cute little brother expression on as he was looking at his sister, China gave a troll smile. "Eh, Sadist. So old or young doesn't matter, you still have a sister complex at this age, huh? You're a poor parody of Shinpachi."

Sadist was about to turn to his rival with a good and filled with irritation come back, but since Mitsuba was standing in front of him, he let it go for now, making sure to pay her back later.

"You've grown to be such a handsome young man." Sand haired girl smiled at her younger brother who was now taller that her, or will be.

Kagura looked a little confused. "Mitsuba-nee, how did you know that this was him?"

"I can recognize my cute little brother everywhere."

Kagura waved her hand in dismissal. "No, no you're missing the point Mitsuba-nee, this guy is not cute or cool or anything that great, he is a number one King of Sad-" She didn't get to finish as both Sougos tripped her.

Mitsuba looked at the vermilion haired girl with surprise. "Kagura-chan? Are you all right? What happened?"

"I'll help her Aneue." Young Okita smiled and offered his hand to China girl. "So clumsy to fall like that. You're shameful for an adult."

With irritation she pushed away his hand standing her, Sadist leaned over whispering with a smirk in her ear. "See now China, even if we hate each other, we still unite against you."

Yato girl was about to pull her umbrella out and attack when Mitsuba asked. "Ah, this uniform? Sou-chan have you become a Shinsengumi officer now?"

"Yes, Aneue I'm a vice-commander of the Shinsengumi." Sadist answered politely with a smile.

Kagura looked at him empty with eyes. "Don't lie like that Sadist, you're not the vice-commander, Mayora is."

Anger mark appeared on his forehead, but he still tried to keep his cool. "Yes, but I'll become on soon."

"In your dreams Sadist. There is no way in hundred years that you will be able to kill Mayo-freak and take his place, then there will be no point in having the Shinsengumi in Gintama."

"Eh? What do you mean Kagura-chan?" Mitsuba asked confused.

Sadist glared at her, but Yato girl ignored him continuing. "You see, Mitsuba-nee, the truth is this guy is a useless lazy ass who doesn't have brains or any skills all he can do is sleep or try to kill Hijibaka every time he gets a chance."

This time loosing his control Older Okita hit Kagura with his fist right on her head, so that a big bump appeared. China gets back to her senses fast, rising up against him with irritation. "What the hell did you do that for, bastard?"

"You're annoying the hell out of me, China. More than ever." He said with poker face annoying his rival more.

Mitsuba giggled. "Oh I see, that you're getting along." Two rivals looked at her, as if wanting to say 'We don't get along', but stopped as the female Okita continued. "But Kagura-chan, don't joke like that. You had me worried there for a minute."

"Eh? No, wait Nee-san, what I said is true this guy is…" China wanted to finish, but was hit again by Sadist.

"You're taking the joke too far, China."

"I'M NOT FREAKING JOKING!"

"So Sou-chan, did you come to take Kagura-chan back?" Mitsuba asked with a smile.

"Yes, Aneue. This girl is useless without me around, so I had to come." Sadist smiled at his sister.

Kagura glared at her rival. "Who are you calling useless bastard?"

Sand haired girl looked sadly at the two. "That's too bad, I wanted to spend more time with Kagura-chan."

"I also want to stay here more." China said smiling at the woman.

Mitsuba smiled. "But it's okay, I think your friends missed you back at home, besides we can always get to meet in the future, right?"

At her words rivals went stiff, neither saying a word, but seeing a worried look on Mitsuba's face they quickly get back to their senses. Kagura smiled. "Sure, we will meet Mitsuba-nee and when we do I'll tell you all about this bastard."

"Do that and I'll kill you China." Sadist whispered.

Female Okita giggled taking the Yato girl hands. "Kagura-chan, can I ask you a favor? Please take care of Sou-chan for me, will you?"

China girl smiled nodding and Mitsuba let her hands go, leaving something inside her palm. Kagura opened her hand to see the same hairpin that Deva gave to Aoi. This is… So that's where I got it…

"You too Sou-chan. Take care of yourself and Kagura-chan." She gently touched his cheek.

King of Sadists smiled. "Don't worry Aneue. This girl will die without me around, so I'll make sure to be the one who kills her."

At first looking shocked then Mitsuba laughed. "If you keep joking like that Sou-chan, she will hate you."

"She already does. I don't think there is anyone stupid enough to marry you, I probably pitied you China." He mumbled with a smirk making sure that only his rival hears it.

Veins popping on her forehead she glared at him, but because she couldn't fight in front of Mitsuba and will be stopped, Kagura smirked like a devil coming with a different idea. Yato girl leaned over towards the little Sougo. "Ne Sadist, as thanks for keeping me amused while I was here, I'll tell you something good."

Sougo looked at her untrusting with poker eyes, but she pulled his collar whispering something in his ear with a troll smile. Young Okita went stiff while the other one had goose bumps run through his body as he glared at his rival. "What the hell did you tell me, China?"

Kagura looked at him with dead fish eyes. "Eh? Isn't he your younger self? Just remember."

"My mind is blocking that memory. I'll kill you China!" Sadist said with irritation.

Kagura grinned. "You're copying baka-nii's line too often Sadist. What, finally came in terms with your feelings?"

Evil aura rising from behind him he said with irritation. "You're dead."

"But before you two go…" Mitsuba said with a smile, since the two rivals were pretty much whispering while fighting with each other as to not reveal their true selves to the woman, especially one sand haired guy who wanted to keep an image of the cute little brother for his sister, female Okita just thought that they were talking and not fighting. "Would you like some tea with sweets?"

The two looked at each other and then at Mitsuba and smiled like two little spoiled brats with cute blush on their face. "Yes!"

"Sou-chan?" Mitsuba looked at young Okita, worried since her little brother didn't answer.

Sougo looked at her and smiled. "Yes, Aneue!"

 

* * *

 

Back to present. Yorozuya house.

"AOI-CHAN I'M BACK!" Kagura slammed opened the door to the yorozuya entering with a huge smile.

Sougo walked right behind her hands in his pockets. "Quite down China. You're disgusting voice is making my ears bleed."

Yato girl turned around to glare at her rival with veins popping out. "Why the hell are you even here Sadist? Go and try to kill Mayora! Shoo~ -Shoo~" She moved her hand as if telling off to the dog.

"I'm not following you China, I have something to tell to Danna." They entered the living room.

China picked her ear as she sits back in the couch looking at Sadistic Captain with dead fish bored eyes. "You're not good at lying, Sadist." She put on a troll smile. "Eh? Sadist, are you stalking me now? Have you love for me made you mad? Poor boy, poor boy." Kagura covered her mouth with her left hand pretending to hold a snicker inside.

In another second Sougo pulled out a bazooka and fired opening a big hole in the same place where just a second ago was placed a couch. "Tch. Missed."

Kagura grabbed Okita's collar and pulled him down glaring at him. "What the hell do you think you're doing Sadist?"

"THAT'S WHAT I WANT TO ASK! YOU BASTARDS BETTER BE READY TO PAY UP FOR THIS!" Otose shouted from downstairs looking up with Tama and Catherina from a newly formed hole.

"That's not it, old hag." Kagura said looking down from a hole. "This is a construction work, we're doing a renovations.

"WHAT KIND OF RENOVATION INVOLVES EXPLOSIONS?"

"We're making a new toilet."

[….]

"It gets bothersome when Gin-chan and I want to use it at the same time and since we have only one toilet we decided to build another one."

"WHAT KIND OF LOGIC IS THAT?"

"You know Gin-chan takes too much time in there, usually bringing in those weird magazines with him and sometimes even Megane go there with those magazines. It's a bother to wait for them, so I made one for myself. Besides Sadaharu can use it too."

"NO, HE CAN'T! DON'T BUILD A TOILET ABOVE MY BAR AND WHAT'S MORE ABOVE MY HEAD." Otose kept shouting.

"I told you to give upstairs to me and throw those useless bunch out. I'm way better than them." Catherine interfered.

Tama looked at Otose talking with her usual robot like voice. "Don't worry Otose-sama, I'll clean your head when they do it."

Old woman bit on her cigarette loosing her patience. "Don't agree with them Tama, if you're going to clean then clean their rotten brain."

"Understood, proceeding the order."

Kagura looked at them with bored eyes. "Why are you worried anyways? Your hair already looks like a toilet seat, so people will never notice."

"WHAT DID YOU SAY?"

China pulled Sadistic king by his collar bringing him over the hole. "Don't worry this guy will up for it."

"THAT'S NOT THE POINT!"

"I won't pay China." Sougo said with bored voice walking to the other couch.

Vein popped on Yato girl's forehead. "You won't dare, Sadistic jackass! I'll make Gin-chan force you. Oh, no better I'll deal with you myself."

"I want to see you try China. Besides it has to be proven to be me."

"WHO ELSE CARRIES A BAZOOKA AROUND AND SHOOTS AT EVERYTHING ALIVE OR DEAD?"

"Ah…" Was the only thing Okita said and picked up a piece of paper lying on the table.

"'Ah' my ass! What kind of respond is that? Just how much of a self ignorance do you have?"

Kagura glared at him demonic aura rising as her wish to kill him. But then she decided to ignore him for a minute since she wanted to see her beloved daughter first. Looking around she just now realized that Yorozuya was totally empty. "Where's Aoi-chan? Gin-chan and Shinpachi is also not here? Oi, Sadist! Did you blow them up?"

"Are you dumb, China girl? They weren't here since the beginning, that's what the note says." Even though Sadist said that with poker face and bored eyes, Kagura still looked at her rival with unbelieving look.

"Ah, there is another note…" She realized and snatched it before him, sticking her tongue out as if a brat winning a small spat, while Okita looked unaffected.

Reading the content of the paper her bangs covered her eyes aura around her serious. Kagura shook with fury as Sougo arched a brow at her reaction, wondering a little what was written in there.

 

* * *

 

Shinsengumi HQ.

Slamming the door open to Hijikata's room Sougo entered finding only Bakaiser sitting there looking through some papers. "So this is where he is hiding." Feeling someone entering he looked up.

"Didn't you learn that you should knock?"

Sougo looked at the man with poker face. "I learned it at the same place you did." Bakaiser sit up scratching his head as Sadist approached him and said with serious voice. "Tell me, who the hell is Fox?"

Bakaiser's hand stopped as he looked up at young captain. "Where did you hear that name?"

"From this. China, run away after reading this, I suppose you know something." Sougo handed the older man a piece of paper that was all crumpled.

Not loosing his poker face, but his heart filling with more anger and anxiety Bakaiser stood up coming face to face with his other self. "No wonder that the older one disappeared too."

"You look pretty calm for someone who's daughter is kidnapped and wife is gone missing." Sougo said mockingly.

Bakaiser smirked. "I wouldn't worry for my China she will find a way around, don't underestimate my woman. As for Aoi, if little China is there then we have more time now."

"You still didn't answered who the hell is that Fox?"

Bakaiser scratched his head moving away and picking up his coat to put it on. "It's none of your business, so don't get involved. I'll deal with this myself."

Sougo blocked the other's way as he tried to leave the room. "I have no intention of getting involved in anything that would be too troublesome. What I want to know is who is he?"

"What is it to you?"

Sadistic captain answered not moving his gaze away from himself. "Curious."

"More like worried." Bakaiser smirked and moved on time to block the sword that almost cut his throat. "Hmm, such interesting eyes I had back in days, when I have time later let's spar, shall we?"

"No, I prefer killing you know!" Sadist smirked and charged the two engaging in a battle.

5-year-in-the-future Okita stopped him with a mocking grin. "Can you actually kill yourself? Weird, I always thought that I love myself more that anyone."

"I love myself, I hate you."

"But I am, you."

Okita stopped and looked at him with poker face, but there was anger and disgust in his eyes. "I refuse to believe that a lousy person who can't even protect his woman, his family can be me in 5 years."

"You just admitted, that China is your woman, little idiot." Bakaiser smirked.

Young captain looked at the man with bored eyes. "Don't twist things around bastard! I'll pay you back later for this."

"Geez, what a boring and pitiful fight you're having here it puts me to sleep." Silver entered the scene scratching his head.

Gin-chan right behind him walked inside picking his nose. "Did you brats forget that this is Gintama? Be livelier, lively. Where is the usual goofing around?"

"Oh, I know that's probably because we don't have a straight man in here. Lets call him together." Silver perm said and everyone in the room called out. "Megane!"

In an instant Shinpachi crashed both Gin-chans head to the wall and shouted. "STOP BREAKING THE MOOD, MORONS! This is a serious part where we're getting close to the end; we have to be more serious. Act mature!"

"Geez, Patsuan, calm down." Perm head complained. "This is our character we can't change it."

"DON'T GIVE ME THAT CRAP!" Patchy continued to shout. "Look what you did now the mood is totally broken. What will you do now?"

Silver scratched his head standing up. "Oh, it's easy to fix." He approached the two Okita and stand in dramatic, epic pose in which every hero stands before revealing a bog secret. "Souichirou-kun~"

"It's Sougo." Both corrected him.

"Fox is…. your long lost brother!" Silver samurai said with serious tone and cliché music on the background.

Sougo stayed with poker face, Bakaiser's eyebrow twitched. Everyone else froze in the room, even Toushi who was just passing by, freeze hearing it, even Yamazaki who was playing badminton, even Kondo being beaten up by Otae and Tae-chan beating up Kondo, somewhere in his own place Fox had goose bumps all over his body feeling someone talking behind him.

"DON'T LIE AT THE END OF THE CHAPTER!" Shinpachi shouted as the scene went black and ending song played.


	12. Everything is not what it seems, it's never what it seems, it's… Oh, well I'm tired of making the titles that no one cares about

"Geez, we're making it sound so dramatic, we even skipped to another chapter for an explanation, but it's nothing serious, right?" Gin-chan said picking his ear.

Silver crossed his arms over his chest with serious look. "That's true, this is just going to be one of our usual epic fights and we will win that's it."

"Okay, there is nothing to see everyone, so go find something else for fun." Bakaiser said with bored voice waving at the camera.

"STOP WITH THIS ALREADY! YOU'RE THE MAIN CHARACTERS, SHOULD YOU ACTUALLY SAY THAT? WE WILL LOSE FANS LIKE THIS!" Shinpachi shouted.

"Calm down Patsuan, it's the truth anyways. I mean after we revealed everything they pretty much know everything now." Perm head said.

Megane looked at him with empty eyes. "No, we actually didn't explain anything yet."

"Eh? But I did say the punch line in previous chapter at the end. Man, I looked so cool, as always." Silver samurai said full of pride scratching his chin.

"THAT WAS A LIE!" Patchy shouted getting pissed at his boss.

"Honestly, Danna, couldn't you make up a better lie than that?" Sougo commented with poker face relying on the wall.

Young yorozuya leader looked at them with annoyance. "Huh? If you're so good at that then make one yourself, Souichirou-kun."

"It's Sougo~" Okita sit up.

"Oh, I have an idea." Future Gin-chan said with a smirk. "Fox is hiding under the mask, so lets say that he is Souichirou's alter ego and he was set free due to some stupid thing (anything, will be fine), and now he is back to destroy Okita and take over the world."

Yorozuya looked with interest. "Oh, sounds interesting. Everyone will buy it and it's a real catch. Then I will appear and save the day."

"Nah, it's too cliché!" Bakaiser commented waving his hand. "It should be more like, this. Fox is hiding behind the mask because he is… ugly. Every villain, (only the main once) are handsome and cool in Gintama, so knowing that he is no match for their radiance he is hiding behind the mask and tries to destroy all the others, so he can get a girlfriend."

"That might work." Silver and Gin-chan acknowledged.

"I disagree." Sougo said joining the discussion. "It should be something with more cool scenes for me. For example: During a heated battle when everyone was injured I alone left standing and then while fighting I put an ugly scar on his face now he has to wear a mask and he came back to take revenge."

Everyone waved his hand in dismissal. "No way, no way, no way. That's even more stupid that the last time."

"Besides I don't want to sound so pathetic as to be saved by a Sadistic captain." Gin-chan said looking at the young boy with dead fish eyes.

"What if Fox is Kagura then?" Silver said all of a sudden everyone turned to look at him. "Well, you know she dressed up as fox to play a game with Bakaiser and somewhere it went out of control."

Everyone went deep in thoughts scratching their chin. "They hate each other and always fight, she run away to the past because she was pissed at him. So maybe… That can happen."

"No, no, no… That won't be fun at all." Bakaiser shook his head. "It's almost the same as 'villain is your father' theme, so cliché and boring. Lets find something else."

"We should think of something more fun then." Older Yorozuya commented, but before he could say anything, Megane who finally lost his patience shouted.

"WILL YOU, THE SQUAD OF MORONS, STOP THIS ALREADY! What's with those plot lines, where did you get them? We already have the script, so follow it!"

"What Patchy are you angry that we didn't make something for you?" Gin-chan said. "Fine, then lets make it like this. Shinpachi's heart will become black and ugly in the future because he was still a virgin. In 5 years, while everyone else get to have lovers, he was lonely in the dark corner of his room with Otsu pillows and posters. So he decided to take revenge, but he couldn't ruin his straight man and good guy character, so he decided to wear a fox mask, then the first once he came after was Kagura and Sougo, since they were the first to become lovers."

"Then during a battle Okita learned about Shinpachi's secret, but made a promise to hide it forever in exchange for the other becoming his slave. After three years while Souichirou was away Megane decided to use his weakness and attacked and then…" Silver was continuing.

"I DON'T WANT THAT! WHY ARE YOU TURNING ME INTO SOME LOUSY CHARACTER WITH A NERVOUS BREAK DOWN WHO WANTS TO KILL EVERYONE? I DON'T WANT TO END MY LIFE AS A VILLAIN." After a second Patchy shouted. "AND WHY AM I STILL A VIRGIN IN 5 YEARS?"

"Oh, then we can…" Bakaiser said with boring tone.

"ENOUGH!" Megane stopped him. "Just explain to us who the hell is Fox and we will get over with it."

Bakaiser sigh. "Geez, you're so boring. Now where is my script?" Future Sadistic captain took out a pile of paper from inside his jacket and started reading it. "Okay ready!"

"YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO REVEAL ALL THAT!" Shinpachi's shout was the last that was heard because scene went black and we switched from 'Goofy mode' to 'Serious'.

 

* * *

 

"You guys are going to face Fox in two years or so." Bakaiser started. "I guess it won't be a shock if I told you that it's all started from Yorozuya and then spread to Shinsengumi like always and we got involved."

Everyone nodded already knowing that it was always like that. Since it concerns yorozuya lets give Silver a chance to tell us a little about that. "One day Kagura and Sadaharu walking in one of their favorite or not so much rainy days found a girl. She wasn't that much injured, but she looked weak and exhausted as if she ran for hours like her life depends on it. She collapsed right in front of Kagura, so she brought her back to Yorozuya for us to see what happened. Honestly would have been better if she just took her to the hospital. After the girl came back to her self and eat something she paid us lot of money as I remember, for us to let her stay in here."

"She became part of yorozuya then?" Shinpachi asked.

Silver shook his head. "Nah, she wanted to leave Edo, but since she didn't have any documents on her we had to do it illegally."

"You have guts to say that in here, Yorozuya! I'll arrest you bastard!" Hijikata entered the room.

Gin-chan looked at him annoyed. "Why are you here Mayora? This has nothing to do with you."

"THIS IS MY OFFICE, BASTARD!" Toushi shouted.

Silver ignored their pitiful fight and continued. "Well, since she paid and Kagura already spend most of her night with Souichirou we let her stay until we find a ways for her to leave the country."

"In couple of days that she was with Danna and the others, she also made friends with Shinsengumi. Also, she both Megane and Zaki were interested in her."

"Eh?" Patchy looked at them shocked.

"Yeah, we almost thought that this is going to turn into some kind of a love triangle, but she clearly said that they're not her type. Plus, she was a Sadist like Okita and it's not wonder Kagura, Bakaiser and she get along." Older yorozuya leader said with bored voice.

"As she left finally we learned that there is more trouble coming. New Join group has been formed and they were getting really powerful, now because of that girl they have come to Edo."

Scratching his head Silver Gin-chan commented. "Their leader was Fox. No one knows his real name or identity, so we just went on calling him that because of the mask. Well, as later we learned that guy actually wanted to form an alliance with Takasugi and get the power of Kihietai and Harusame with Kamui who was with one eyes pervert back then to his side."

"Tch. I am not surprised, that Bakasugi is involved?" Gin-chan said picking his ear, looking annoyed.

Nodding the other Yorozuya continued. "But what is shocking is that Bakasugi refused to form an alliance with Fox."

Gin-chan arched a brow and Shinpachi said with shocked voice what everyone was thinking. "Why would Takasugi refuse? He always helps those who want to destroy the Edo."

"Like hell I know. No one knows what's going on in that perverted mind of his."

Bakaiser took over. "Well, Fox had more stored under his sleeves than just Kihietai. After being rejected by the man who is considered the most dangerous between Joui, he decided to take on another Yato sibling who will definitely force lots more people to obey him than just Harusame."

"He was after China girl?" Hijikata asked blowing out a smoke.

Future Sougo nodded. "That bastard realized that if China was on his side then Danna, Megane and every other powerful person who cares for her would have to obey her."

"What did Kagura-chan do?" Megane asked concerned.

"She refused of course, who do you think raised her?" Silver said annoyed.

Shinpachi shook his head looking with empty eyes. "No, because it's you, who raised her I thought…"

"That's why you're still a virgin…" Future Yorozuya leader commented and when Shinpachi looked irritated he smirked and continued. "He wasn't the kind of man to make his move straight. Fox perfectly understand whom he was dealing with and that man knew about our past. Like me being Shiroyasha or Kagura being Kamui's sister and Baldy's daughter, that man used all that information and attacked from where we least expected."

"He started hurting people close to us, who had nothing to do with the fight or with the rain girl yorozuya found." Bakaiser said with poker face, but there was annoyance. "While we were looking for him and he was pretty much every time tricking us giving the false lead, Fox kept injuring and attacking more of our friends."

"Not like we were at los, but imagine trying to be everywhere at the same time because be it Yoshiwara, Snack smile, Yagyuu they attacked everywhere. Most of them were able to defend, but it didn't mean that they would come out unharmed." Silver looked bored and calm, but just like with Bakaiser his voice also had hints of annoyance.

"Tch. So that bastard was playing dirty."

"Yep, and you were as useless as ever Oogushi-kun." Gin-chan said with sarcasm. Making Toushi angry.

But once again ignoring his young Danna, Bakaiser continued. "He never attacked upfront, like right now with Aoi, then it was our friends. Well, right now we know who he is and what he wants, but then it was chaos."

"Long arc short. Lets end this." Future Yorozuya ordered.

"Wait, why was he after that girl we found?" Shin asked.

Silver shrug frowning. "As if I know. She left without explanation and he kept blaming us for it. Well, later we did learn that she was actually his daughter and when he started to kill people and become evil, she just ran away, nothing more than that though."

"This is going to take forever if we keep going like this, so let me finish." Future Okita relied on the wall with poker face arms crossed over his chest. "Just like today China received a letter, telling her that if she doesn't want for more of her friends to die then she have to come to Fox."

"That idiot." Sougo said sighing already guessing what Yato girl did.

Bakaiser nodded. "She is, but luckily she wasn't as smart as to take the letter with her or get rid of it, so thanks to it we were able to spot on where Fox was hiding. Fox tough that Kagura being in his hands we won't be able to do anything and we wouldn't have if not for Psycho-nii."

"Kamui was involved?" Shinpachi asked with shock as two Gintoki's exchanged glances.

Silver sigh. "After fighting with me because he felt like it and having a battle with Sadistic captain, because he seemed strong that brat decided to join in with us against Fox, of course with the promise that after the battle he will get the chance to battle with both me and Okita."

"While I together with Kamui and that mop head charged inside, Danna, Hijibaka and the others dealt with other places that guy owned." Bakaiser took over. "Well, after a long and epic battle we did win and were able to stop him."

Toushi looked at the captain blowing out another smoke. "Then why did you left him alive? Or more like isn't it kind of cliché for one time villains to die in the end of the arc?"

Future Sadist arched a brown not really planning to answer, but that's when Sougo talked. "He is a sissy even more than you Hijikata-san, he probably pitied him. Che, so disgusting."

Bakaiser draw his sword swinging it towards Sougo and almost hitting him, if the young man didn't jumped away on time. "Say that again and you're dead."

Young Okita just looked at him bored and uninterested, Bakaiser smirked. "Well, then I'll tell you the truth, but I don't think that you will like it."

"Enough with the jokes. We don't have time!" For the first time Silver commanded with threatening voice making everyone surprised. "Kagura was injured during a battle that's the only reason that guy is alive."

"Eh? But Silver Gin-san isn't Kagura-chan Yato? She wouldn't die from just a bullet." Patsuan commented.

"Those were special bullets. Fox created a special kind of bullet that can kill even a Yato in an instant. Those things had a special chemicals in it, so that when the bullet contact with blood it explodes and through blood steam those chemicals reach the heart in an instant for a human, it take a while, few hours for a Yato, so no one have a chance to stand against a date with death."

Future Okita nodded taking over. "Yeah, against that we had only one choice left. Mop head, Abuto said that if we make it in time to Harusame then we could take her back to Yato planet and maybe able to heal her. Be it psycho-nii or I there was not a single chance that we will let her die, so I left the guy to Danna and Hijikata and left with Kamui and Abuto taking China with us."

"What happened then?" Toushi asked.

Bakaiser looked at him with empty eyes. "What do you think Hijibaka-san? I'm married and have a daughter with her, so what happened you tell me."

Devil vice-commander got even more pissed, veins popping on his face. "DON'T TREAT ME LIKE AN IDIOT! It's not what I asked. Why is Fox out and in here?"

"He faked his death." Silver said bluntly making everyone look at him surprised. "Two month after he faked his death and run away from the jail. Everyone kept looking for him since then, but we never found him."

"In the end I had to leave for a year with Kamui and Abuto searching through the universe, but what came as a shock was that China was actually stupid enough to travel back in time making it easy for that guy to find her and Aoi." Future Sougo finished with irritation. "Now I have only one day to find and stop that guy. Before the history repeat itself. What's more my Daughter is in his hands, Kagura is with him and my wife is out there looking for them because she is just so damn stubborn to listen to me and follow the plan."

"Well, at least Aoi-chan won't be scared because Kagura-chan is there." Shin said as if to calm the man down."

"It's true, but it doesn't change anything. If we don't find him until the time is up then we will lose more than you think." Silver said picking his nose.

"Geez, so troublesome. I'll pass." Gin-chan said and walked to the door.

Bakaiser grabbed him collar turning him back. "Danna! I already have two stubborn Yato siblings who will not follow my plan and cause trouble, so you better stay and do your heroic, careless main character acts within my plan and helping us."

Gintoki scratched his head looking as bored as ever while looking at the sand haired man, who was standing at the same eye level with him. "So what's the plan?"

 

* * *

 

Fox's HQ.

"That's what happened. So what do you think, after you learned what I did are you still willing to stay in here, Kagura?" Fox said with a smirk, it wasn't seen because of the mask, but it was felt from his voice.

Kagura was happily playing with Aoi totally ignoring the man. Getting annoyed Fox shouted. "DON'T IGNORE ME BRAT! WHO'S FAULT DO YOU THINK IT IS THAT I'M HERE?"

Kagura looked at him with dead fish eyes. "Huh? What kind of problem you have with Bakaiser or Deva is none of my concern, I'm here for Aoi. If you're such a coward to not have guts to face them one on one then go throw yourself off the cliff, you're pathetic."

"WHO'RE YOU CALLING PATHETIC?" The man sighs. "I see, you never change, past or future same old brat. Pissing me off like this!"

"That's because you're no danger for me and you having problem with Sadist is not my concern either."

At her words Fox felt anger rising in him, but he had other things to take care of, so he decided to ignore it. "Well it doesn't matter, my real enemy is Sougo Okita."

"Oi, smug face…" Kagura called out in bored voice.

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING SMUG FACE?"

"If I make a choice to leave, I'm taking Aoi with me."

Fox smirked again and talked with high and mighty voice. "No can do, Kagura-chan. You can leave and fight on Sougo Okita's side or stay and help me, but Aoi is my guest until her father comes, so she is not leaving. And if you do try something funny, then I don't guarantee her safety." And he left leaving the two girls alone.

Kagura tightened her fists cursing under her breath. Aoi put her little hand on her young mother's cheeks and smiled. "Mommy, don't be sad~ Pappy will come."

Yato girl looked at little Sadist arching a brow and said with a smirk hugging the girl. "He better come Aoi! Because if he don't I'm going to shove that bazooka up his ass and fire him to the moon."

Young Okita daughter looked at China confused not quite getting what she stated, but then she smiled. "Mama loves pappy!"

"From where did you get the idea that I love him?" Putting the girl on the floor Kagura stood up with a grin. "Well, think what you want, but for now I have to find a way to get us both out of here."

 

* * *

 

Future. Harusame Ship.

"The future is in chaos again." Deva said looking through the big widows towards the Earth. She came back to future because she knew somehow that Fox will be here or if he is not here then at least Aoi will be kept in the future because in the past it would be easier to find her. But as soon as she came to future, Kagura ended up in her brother's ship and that didn't make her happy, but oh, well for now she doesn't have a choice.

"Well, you guys messing with the past so much the future is bound to change." Abuto commented standing beside her.

Kagura looked at the man with empty eyes, but stayed quiet for now. She really had to find her daughter and save her before anything happens. Even her own memories are wavering and changing with every second, so much that she doesn't know what will happen next.

"So that's where you were. I was looking for you." Kamui smiled as he approached the two.

"I'm shocked that you attend meetings baka-nii, in the past you hated it."

Yato boy looked at his sister smiling. "I still hate it, but for Aoi-chan I have to finish and dispose of them or I can't go and save her."

Yato girl looked at him with annoyance and dead fish eyes then return her gaze back to Earth. Being in past she remembered how she hated her brother back then and she is still under that effect.

"Abuto did you find anything?" Kamui asked mop head.

Abuto nodded. "Yes, we found where that guy is hiding and right now heading there. Just few more hours and we will reach it."

"Good."

"You're not going to follow Bakaiser's plan?" Kagura asked her brother, she already knew that Sougo contacted baka-nii and they were kind of working together. It wasn't a shock because for Aoi, Kamui would do this, besides he is still excited as ever to have a chance for a battle with Sougo and Gin-chan.

"Same as you." Kamui smiled looking at his sister. "But I'm not following only one half of it, the other half is something that should be kept since I have the same idea."

"Huh?" Kagura looked at her brother frowning and confused as she felt something hit her head and she fell forwards mumbling with confusion. "Kamu-nii?"

Kamui catch Kagura half way before she fell and relied her against his chest as he smiled at Abuto. The said man sighs looking at two siblings. "If you two want to protect her then do it in less painful way and so that when she wakes up she won't be pissed enough, so that she would want to crash the whole ship."

Yato boy didn't say anything as he picked up his sister and started walking. "It's okay, it's okay. We will say that it's brother-in-law who suggest it. For now lets lock her up somewhere."


	13. When locking the wild cat in the cage, be careful she bites back.

Bakaiser broke open the door beating everyone on his way while walking inside the Fox's HQ, with Gin-chan right beside him. After explaining everything to others, Yamazaki told them that while spying on some weird people he found the headquarters. Everyone divided in three different groups, each deciding to attack from different side. Since just like three years ago (or more like in two more years) that man had more than one base he was hiding in and one of them should be where he keeps China and Aoi.

"Oi, Souichirou don't walk around like you own the place, it's annoying." Gin-chan said half annoyed and half uncaring while picking his nose.

"It's Sougo, Danna." Bakaiser commented with deadpanned voice. "What do you mean, I do own this place and also every other place in the Edo."

"You're attitude is pissing me off." Perm head looked at the man with dead fish eyes.

The two samurai stopped on their track as they were surrounded by bunch of men, probably Fox's guards.

Bakaiser scratched his head sighing. "Geez, I don't have time to deal with this weaklings. Danna, take care of them!" He ordered making the later even angrier.

"DON'T TREAT ME LIKE YOUR WATCH DOG! Take care of your own shit."

"No way, this is bothersome, I should go and do some more cool stuff since I'm the hero of this fanfic."

Vein popping out, Gin-chan kept shouting while both of them totally ignored the men around them. "YOU'RE NOT THE MAIN HERO, BASTARD! YOU'RE JUST THE POOR REPLICA OF AN ANNOYING BRAT!"

"Are you sure you should say that Danna? I know more about your future than you do. Not afraid that I'll use it against you?" Future Okita said his poker face not changing.

"Why you-"

"Both of you stop fighting like two brats!" Silver's voice came out from the walkie-talkie inside Bakaiser's pocket making the two stop. "We have bigger problem on our hands than a useless argument about the main hero."

"True…" Sougo said through the same walkie-talkie. Before leaving they arranged one line for everyone and divided the walkie-talkies, each taking one, so it will be easy to tell each other the situation and hear everything on time. "But if it's about main character then in this fic, I'm the hero." He continued.

"In your dreams, little brat. It's more exciting to read about a mature man than a dishonest kid with puppy love." Bakaiser said with sarcasm.

"I'll give you a choice before this arc is over, so decided which kind of death do you want to die. Slow and painful or really slow and agonizing?" Sadist smirked his eyes blazing with kill intend.

"Same goes for you too then, Little Sougo."

"ENOUGH YOU TWO! THIS IS GETTING IRRITATING!" Silver Gintoki shouted. "There is no one cooler than me and this fanfic wouldn't even seen the light if I wasn't the main hero of Gintama and everyone didn't fall for the great Gin-sama."

Gin-chan picked his nose with bored look on his face. "Most of that might be true, but it wasn't thanks to the sissy character like you, it was all my doing, the cool me before he became a lousy guy who's afraid of his lover."

His blood boiling with murderous black feeling of unbelievable wish to kill himself Silver said as much calm and uncaring as he tried to sound. "I'll support you Okita-kun, so lets take care of those two. I prefer letting them die a slow and agonizing death."

"Sure, Danna, that's also my favorite punishment, we should…"

"Its no wonder that we're the Sadistic Duo." Bakaiser commented just a second before angry Hijikata Toushi started to shout through the walkie-talkie.

"WILL YOU MORONS STOP THIS ALREADY! WHY ARE YOU CARRYING ON THE NORMAL CONVERSATION WHILE YOU'RE ON THE ENEMY BASE."

"Chill out Hijikata-san." Sougo said deadpanned voice. "Or better just go and die." His last comment was followed by three "Yeah and totally" words.

"DAMN YOU SOUGO! NEXT TIME I SEE YOU… I'LL BITE YOU TO DEATH!" Devil vice-commander shouted.

"Ne Hijikata-san, don't steal another characters lines. That's pathetic of you." Bakaiser commented with his usual Annoy-the-hell-out-of-everyone voice.

"Tch." Gin-chan cursed sending an irritated stare through the walkie-talkie to Mayora. "If we get canceled because of this it's your fault."

"You ruined the mood Hijibaka-san. That line would have suited me more, since my character kind of overlap with that person, in sadism and being strong part." Sougo said with bored voice.

"ENOUGH IS ENOUGH! IF YOU SAY ANOTHER WORD I'M GOING TO LET MATSUDAIRA FIRE AND YOU ALL WITH THAT FOX FREAK GOING TO DIE AND THAT WOULD SAVE ME THE TROUBLE!"

"Geez, you're such a party pooper Oogushi-kun." Gin-chan said with dead fish eyes wiping his treasure that he found in his nose on Bakaiser's coat. "Honestly, how do you manage to live with him without-? Oh wait you're trying to kill him."

"Now you understand why." Both Okita said in unison, getting from two Gin-chan's a nod and 'yeah' as a reply.

"DON'T JUST AGREE WITH EACH OTHER, YOU TEAM OF SADISTIC MORONS!" Mayora shouted, but was ignored since the two teams of Sadistic Duo decided to finally start their mission, they came here to do in the first place.

 

* * *

 

Future. Harusame ship.

Deva woke up her head exploding from pain. That bastard Abuto actually hit her with all his might, or maybe not, since she would have been in even worst condition than this if he did. Anyways, what are those two idiots thinking, it's not the time for this stupid game when she has to go and save her beloved little daughter.

Kagura sit up on the bed holding her head and looked around, the room was dark, but she could feel that she was alone, only light that was coming was from the table lamp. China girl stand up and went to the door trying to open it, but it was locked. She tried to turn the handle few more times, but once again it didn't work. In the end she started hitting it and trying to break it.

"DAMN YOU KAMUI, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU PLAYING AT? GET ME OUT OF HERE!" Yato girl shouted hitting the door with all her might, but it didn't even budge. "What the hell? Why won't it break?"

"Okita-san, please calm down. This room was made by the special order from Abuto, it's resistant against Yato power." Someone said from outside the door with troubled voice.

Kagura arched a brow. "Why would that perverted old mop head make such a room?"

"Well…"

"Shut up, I don't want to know!" She banged at the door again. "Open this f**** door or I'll break it and then you! Do you know who I am?"

Man continued with shaking voice. "Captain ordered us to keep this room locked and not let you out no matter what. If we don't listen we will be killed."

"Don't worry I'll kill you before he does!" Kagura said with threatening voice.

The guard gulped hard, but didn't answer. After couple of more attempts to break the door that ended with nothing, Kagura stopped for now.

"That mop head is so dead…" Deva mumbled and decided to come up with the plan to escape since there was no way that she was leaving her precious angel in the hands of idiot smiling face and mop head freak. Damn it, treating her like some weakling!

"You're out of you freaking mind, China! If you think that I'll let you get anywhere near that man again!" Bakaiser said with threatening voice.

"Sadist saying that and then Kamui all of a sudden coming to meet me as soon as I return. I should have known that they were planning something." Yato girl said her anger rising. She made a mental note to kill both her brother and husband when this is all over, it wouldn't be bad to raise Aoi alone, single mothers have such a charm. She concluded.

 

* * *

 

Fox's hideout 1. Sougo Okita present.

Sougo walked slowly through the long hall leaving countless lifeless bodies of Fox's guards. For such weaklings it was enough just to make a half swing and they were dead or half dead already. It was so boring he could die from boredom; there was no one that could make him enjoy the fight. Well, he would enjoy the fight with Danna, since the man is really strong and one time wasn't enough, so he has to arrange for another battle later. The other thing that kept him interested is fighting China, since she is a Yato and he's yet to see her true power. Well, it looks like his wish just got granted.

As he entered the big hall that seemed to be the dining room he felt danger and dodged just in time as something came flying towards him. Sougo turned around unsheathing his sword and dodging the countless bullets that were shot at him. He lowered his sword when rain of bullets stopped and waited for the dust to come down and that's when he saw his opponent.

To say that he was happy or sad, shocked or anything else would be wrong, since he didn't felt any of those. Sougo just kept staring at his China with his usual poker face.

"Attacking me all of a sudden you must have missed me." He said mockingly and dodged her next attack that broke the floor. "I'm happy to see you too, China!"

Kagura pointed at him her umbrella, Yato girl's eyes lifeless and dead as she looked at her rival and there was a crazy smile plastered on her face. Sougo frowned looking at her sensing something weird. She charged again, but when he tried to dodge her directly Okita was sent flying and broke the wall before falling face down.

Sadist stood up fast whipping the blood off his lips and glaring at his rival with eyes blazing with anger. "Oi, China what the hell? I don't mind you using your whole Yato power in a fight, but this is not the time."

Sougo barely finished saying when Kagura charged at him again. She wasn't herself and Okita realized that, she was like a killing machine lead only by her thirst for blood. She almost seemed like a beast. This must be the true Yato power inside her, Sadist knew that she was surpassing that power, he realized that some time after they started fighting at their every meeting. Then he questioned Megane and after some 'friendly' (more like sadistic) warning and chats he agreed to tell Sadistic captain about China's secret.

But why would she release it at this time and what's more use it against him? Oh, no wait a second question is pretty easy, they hate each other, so it's normal, even though their hatred reduced since Aoi appeared. Yet the first question still bothered him, China isn't the kind of person who will fall under control of her blood willingly for some pity fight like this. After all this is the side that she hates the most in herself.

Crazy smile not leaving her face and with scary blood filled big eyes Kagura kept attacking him. Sougo did fight back, but first – in her full Yato mode she was strong, but still nothing he couldn't handle if he also went all out, or so he said to himself, but that was hardly possible, second – she was not only acting like a beast she was almost like a monster who didn't care to put her life in line just to kill her opponent and Okita didn't wanted to kill her.

"Damn you, China! Get back to your senses!" Okita shouted and charged their weapons clashed few time, but then Sougo flew away again managing to hit her with the back of his sword. Okita cursed, he has to get his old China back before she kills him or harms herself even more. Sadistic prince stood up and turned his sword to its dull side, so that he won't cut her in the spur of the moment. It's time to get serious.

 

* * *

 

Future. Harusame ship.

"Oi, wheel boy. Turn this ship around we're going back to baka-nii!" Deva ordered pointing the end of her umbrella against the head of one of the man driving the ship.

If those two idiots and that mop head thought that just a door and Yato proof room are able to hold back the Queen of Kabuki-cho, then they better think again, since escaping that room was a piece of a cake, who do you think raised her and in what kind of family she grew up? She is Kagura, one of the Yorozuya three, Gin-chan's cute 'mother' (actually that should be daughter) and she had Anego and the others to raise her into woman she is now. Like hell after all this years of living with those people a door could hold her back.

"Huh?" The threatened man wanted to turn with annoyance thinking that he can handle a woman, but when he saw that all his subordinates lying all over the place injured and half dead he changed his mind and decided to obey, but before that he said with a shaking voice. "Um, b-but Captain said…."

"I don't give a damn what Kamui said, because if you disobey me your blood will paint this room." Kagura threatened. Of course she wasn't seriously going to kill the man, but she would beat him up, he didn't have to know about this though.

Those words seemed enough since the guy pressed all kind of buttons and things, then finally ship turned around and started taking course to where her brother was left. She didn't give a damn for what Kamui was doing, but if Aoi is there then she has to hurry. And after she saves Aoi, China has to hurry back to past, because she doesn't have a memory about this day 5 years ago and her heart is filled with a worry. Kagura has a really bad feeling about this.

 

* * *

 

Fox's hideout 2. Future.

"Is this all the force Fox has? So weak, I can't believe brother-in-law has a problem with it." Kamui walked to the container where Fox usually holds his hostages with his usual smile.

Abuto scratched his head with a sigh. "Usually this much would be considered a pretty good security for humans, but not for you I guess." He pointed with his thumb behind him.

There was a mountain of bloodied bodies of men lying all over the place. Since Kamui didn't wanted to loose any time stopping he decided to just kill them along the way while walking it was easy and in the end, first floor of the hideout and every other floor and halls were filled with dead bodies.

Kamui smiled at the older man and looked inside the container standing few feet away. Aoi was smiling and playing inside the container with bunch of dolls and toys while eating sukobu.

"Aoi-chan…" Kamui called out happily and Aoi turned around with bored eyes, but when she saw her beloved uncle her eyes returned to life and she stood up smiling happily. "I came to pick you up!"

Aoi rejoiced and run towards her uncle not minding the glass in between them, sensing something wrong Kamui shouted. "STAY BACK!"

Aoi stopped with a shock her azure eyes filling with tears. Abuto looked at his captain with empty eyes. "Don't shout at the kid. See she is crying now."

Even though his smile was still on Yato boy looked serious. He kicked the stone towards the glass of the container and thousand volts of electricity hit all of a sudden from the glass turning the stone to the dust. "Aoi-chan, don't touch the glass ok? I get you out soon."

Little sadist wiped her eyes smiling and nodded being happy that her uncle is not angry or doesn't hate her. Since no one ever shouts at her, her parent's and family influence, she was shocked for that to happen.

"Fox is smarted than I thought. Now then Abuto how should we break this glass that's separating me and Aoi-chan."

Abuto was standing his back facing Kamui while he was looking around the room. "Right now we have bigger problem than just electricity."

Kamui turned around to look and understood right away what his friend meant. There were many guns sticking out of every wall pointed at them and it didn't take the genius to know that they were filled with Anti-Yato bullets. It's not like he expected for Fox to allow them near his hostage that easily, considering everything that happened 3 years ago, but that man was proving to be even more dangerous than before or not, since as soon as they get Aoi out, the plan is almost complete.

Kamui grabbed his umbrella his smile still on and antenna twitching. "I'll just shoot them down."

Abuto put his umbrella over the Yato boy's blocking his move. "Those are the sensor guns. They will react to your movements, so you will be killed even before you draw your weapon."

Vermilion haired guy smiled uncaring about anything. "Well, then lets wait for my back up plan."

"You have a back up plan?" Sand haired man arched a brow. "You? The person who's in his whole life cared only for two things, killing and getting stronger, have a plan?"

"I'll kill you Abuto!" Captain threatened with an idiotic smile. "Wait for a little longer Aoi-chan! I'll get you out soon." Kamui didn't turn but from the corner of his eye he could she Aoi nodding with a trusting smile.

 

* * *

 

Fox HQ. Present.

Leaving Gintoki to deal with everything Bakaiser went on a tour inside the hideout, which seemed to be the main one, to find Fox. Final battle was close, but he didn't care for it, since as long as his China and Aoi are with psycho-nii he will take care of them and Kagura with little Sougo are suppose to be together with Silver, well after they find the Yato girl, so for Bakaiser this fight was suppose to be as easy as taking a candy from a kid, but something seemed wrong.

Somehow he didn't have a memory of this day from 5 years ago, not like it was forgotten or blocked, it simply doesn't exist. Since he came to the past searching for his wife and daughter everything that happened to Little Sougo appeared in his memories too, but there is nothing about this day. He has a really bad feeling about this. Three years ago Fox used China against him and all that happened, this time it won't be a surprise if he does that again. Well, Deva is locked inside Kamui's ship, even if not, she is away, but Kagura is here which means that the danger is still there. Damn it, he has to finish this before anything happens to her.

He stopped in front of the office that had a big plate on the door with words 'Fox-sama's study'. Bakaiser arched a brow. If that guy is trying to hide, then he is choosing the wrong way to do it.

There were voices coming, so he listened in.

"Sir, all our bases are under attack." A man said with troubled voice.

"Hmm, I see." It was Fox, Sougo knew it was him right away, since that man's voice is something that he will never forget, every time he hears it his anger just gets bigger and stronger. "Are they all attacked by the Shinsengumi and Sougo Okita?"

"No, sir. First base is attacked by Sakata Gintoki, future and Sougo Okita, young."

"Hmm, that's not a problem our little China girl will take care of them."

So that's where Kagura is, Sougo it looks like your rival your problem. Bakaiser thought.

"The future base was attacked by Kamui and Harusame. All our men are dead."

Fox laughed. "No problem, he won't be able to escape the final trap. Maybe I'll kill two birds at once, huh? Bakaiser and Kamui, my two most hated enemies."

Bakaiser looked at the door with poker face. You're the only one who thinks that, we don't even see you as a person leave alone seeing you as an enemy.

"Shinsengumi has surrounded us from every side, even the future base is in the blockade by Shinsengumi and Harusame."

Fox stand up laughing. "Is that so? Its unusual for Bakaiser to make such an open attack, there must be a trick."

Sougo kicked he door breaking it, Fox stopped walking and looked at him while the other man run away. Okita smirked. "There is no trick behind it smug face, we just want to finish you all at once. Its stupid of you to think that we will be as clueless as we were 3 years ago. I know all your tricks."

Fox laughed. "Know all my tricks, don't joke around. But oh, well if you're so confident lets have a battle shall we?" The man in the mask drew out his sword with an excited voice enjoying the feeling of the upcoming fight.

Bakaiser grinned like a devil unsheathing his own katana. Despite his looks Fox was a good swordsman and it seems like this time the two will be able to enjoy the fight without anyone interfering. Sadist only hoped that Danna, Sougo and Kamui, especially Kagura, wouldn't ruin his plan.


	14. When trying to steal back what was stolen use the back door or you will go Boom!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those who feel a little confused about the teams here is the Explanation:
> 
> Fox has 3 hideouts. 2 in the present and 1 in the future.
> 
> 1st hideout is ambushed by Sougo Okita (young) and Sakata Gintoki (old), while Gin-chan is dealing with small fry, Sougo has to face Kagura who seems to have fall under control of her Yato blood and right now trying to kill him.
> 
> 2nd hideout is where Aoi is its in the future. Kagura Okita has joined powers with her brother Kamui and Abuto to get Aoi out, but Kamui tricked her locking her up inside the Harusame ship, while he with his nanny went after Aoi, but they fall right inside Fox's trap, right now they're stuck in the middle of the room with guns pointed at them.
> 
> 3rd and the last hideout is Fox's HQ. That's where Gin-chan (young) and Sougo Okita (old) has come. Gin is somewhere fighting while Bakaiser has to face Fox head on.
> 
> While all this is happening inside Hijikata Toushirou and Kondo Isao are in front of the Fox's HQ with other Shinsengumi waiting for a sign to open the fire. Matsudaira is on the look out for the 1st hideout, just waiting to fire anytime, he don't need a sign.

Future. Fox's hideout 2.

Kamui and Abuto were still standing on their place with guns all over the place pointed at them, one move and they would have fired which from itself meant an instant death.

Aoi was still behind the big electrified glass in her little prison looking at her uncle and mop head near him. Kamui smiled at the older man. "Do something about this Abuto, look Aoi-chan is getting angry."

Abuto arched a brow answering with irritation. "What do you mean fix this? I can't just jump under the bullets."

"Aoi hungry~" Aoi complained with cute voice her eyes filled with tears.

"It's okay, wait for a while and I will…" Yato boy just turned his head half way, enough to see his niece when his smile wavered slowly dying out. "Abuto… She found something to eat…"

"Huh?" Sand haired man frowned looking at the girl inside, since he was standing sideways facing Kamui, Abuto could clearly see Aoi. "She found a bug."

"She is definitely a Sadist, trying to 'play' with weak and small."

"That's not the point!" Abuto shouted, but one of the guns shifted because of his slight movement, so he stayed calm. "Shouldn't you stop her?"

"Why? She is hungry, so let her eat."

"That's not okay!"

Kamui smiled again. "Aoi-chan~! You shouldn't eat that, your tummy will go bad."

"But Aoi hungry…" She replied with cute voice.

Yato boy shrugged. "Can't be helped!"

"Don't give up after one fail!" Sand haired man shouted. "Oi, brat if you don't eat that I will buy you a parfait!"

Little sadist looked at him suspicious and then turned away. "Liar~"

Shadow fall over Abuto's eyes as Kamui laughed. "Looks like she saw right through you."

Aoi opened her mouth wide and was about to put the poor bug inside; both Yato men closed their eyes. When they opened their eyes they didn't see the shaking leg of the bug that was struggling, but a piece of green sukonbu that she was eating.

Deva was sitting in front of her daughter gently smiling at her and patting her head as the little girl eat her sukonbu. She then looked up with anger and irritation towards the grown up two Yato men still unable to move.

"You two idiots didn't think that there was a back gate, right? Who in their right mind will barge inside the enemy base when they hold a hostage." Seeing Kamui's smile she continued with sarcasm. "Who else but King-of-Idiotic-Smiling-faces could do that."

"Kagura-chan, you were late." Psycho-nii said cheerfully at his sister.

"YOU FREAKING LOCKED ME UP!" Kagura shouted with fury, but then breathed out smirking. "Serves you right bastards."

China picked up Aoi ready to leave when Little Okita asked. "Mama help Kamu~"

Kagura looked at her shocked at first, but then smiled. "They will be fine, sadists and psycho's don't die, no worries Aoi-chan."

"No, Aoi wants to help Kamu~!" She commanded pouting.

Kagura arched a brow at her, but continued on her way. "They will be fine."

She was about to leave when Aoi started crying her voice almost making Deva deaf since the baby was right beside her ear. She hold her daughter far trying to calm her down, but then China girl realized that it was useless, so she just hugged Aoi and said having no other choice. "Fine, fine! I'll save them!"

Aoi calmed down in an instant and smiled at her mother. Shaking her head Yato girl put little Sadist down and looked towards the two on the other side of the window. "What the hell did you do to my daughter baka-nii, why is she so attached to psycho's and idiots?"

"They're more interesting than weaklings like you." Kamui smiled.

Vein popping out Kagura took out the bazooka and pointed at them. Abuto looked at her expressionless. "Where did you get that bazooka from?"

"Same place my husband does! Now if you die along the way, blame your luck!" She smirked evil and fired. First breaking the window and then firing at the walls one after another exploding the guns. Kagura lowered her weapon proud of herself. When the dust died down Kamui and Abuto entered the jail through the broken window.

"You were really trying to kill us, don't you?" Abuto said with irritation as he closed his umbrella shaking all the dust and stones off of it.

"Che. You survived." China clicked her tongue with annoyance.

"Kamu~ Kamu~" Aoi pulled her uncle by the hem of his trousers. Yato boy looked down at the young girl who was smiling at him.

Kamui sit down in order to make their eye level at least a little equal, since little sadist was looking up rising her head as if she was going to fall backwards, well right now for her everyone seemed like a mountain, giants who're so big and strong. "What is it Aoi-chan?" Yato boy smiled.

Aoi put her little hands on her uncle's cheeks and pulled him closer giving him a smooch; she then smiled at Kamui's surprised face. "I love you."

Psycho-nii smiled patting the little girl's head. "My, my Aoi-chan, it seems like I stole your first kiss."

"Ba-ka-nii…." Horror like voice came from behind him and he turned around with his idiotic smile to see his sister glaring at him with her aura demonic black and dangerous. "What the hell are you doing to my little girl?" Kagura shouted and charged at her brother, the two starting the fight.

It was a stupid and not a dangerous fight, so Abuto decided to ignore it approaching the little sadist and picking her up. "Lets leave them alone for now. Those two idiots need to vent their frustration on something. You're probably hungry, lets find some food." Mop head together with Aoi left the room where the two siblings were fighting.

Little Okita daughter smiled. "Love Abuto~" She said cheerfully.

Abuto smiled patting the little girl's head. "Yeah, I like you too. But don't kiss Kamui again. It would have been a lot more trouble if your father was here."

Little sadist tilted her head smirking (Yep, she actually smirked. Well, that's what you would expect from someone who has the same blood as Sougo and Kagura, plus she grows up in Shinsengumi -Yorozuya family.) "Jealous?"

Abuto gave her an empty look stopping on his way, but he was smarter than most to actually start an argument with a kid. Yet, mop head sigh thinking. You're definitely their daughter.

 

* * *

 

Fox's HQ. Present.

"Not bad for a Fox." Bakaiser smirked looking at his opponent. They were both still fighting inside the villain's office, but then breaking the wall they continued in the hallway and then one way or another they ended up inside a big empty room, so they decided to stop for a minute.

"What's wrong Bakaiser? Having problems killing me? Did you get weak?" Fox said with sarcasm.

"Think of this any way you want, but I'm just dragging the time, since we need to fill the space until the end of the chapter." Sougo answered with his poker face.

"Hahaha~ that's so like you. Well, then Sougo Okita, let me tell you something good." Man in the mask was smiling and even if Okita couldn't see it he could feel it. "You don't have time to lose in here. For about now your other self must have already met Kagura with my little surprise."

Bakaiser looked at him suspicious, but then his eyes went wide realization hitting him. "You don't mean…"

"Yes." Fox replied right away with amusement. "The trick I used back then on your beloved Kagura, happened this time as well, don't you think that you should hurry?"

Bakaiser cursed under his breath. During their first battle with Fox three years ago, this guy was somehow able to pull out Kagura's Yato blood making her loose control and act like a monster fighting both her brother and Sougo, back then they somehow did manage to stop her, but this time little Sougo is alone.

Sand haired Sadist smirked looking at the man in front of him. "You shouldn't underestimate me Fox, I won't get killed easily and I definitely won't allow my rival to stay under your control."

"You think she could be saved? What I think is, if you don't stop me on time then you might disappear any minute and then I'll be free to do whatever I want. Oh, wait your daughter is going to vanish too right? How pitiful, poor Deva will be all lonely."

Bakaiser glared at him getting ready for a fight. "Not, if I take your head first."

"Oi, Bakaiser!" Gin-chan said from behind picking his ear. Both Fox and Sougo looked at the man standing not far from them with a bored look. "Everything is ready, so if you don't hurry this is going to get really trouble some."

Bakaiser smirked switching his attention back to Fox. "Sorry Danna, go ahead and tell them to proceed."

"First, as a watch dog, now you're treating me like an errand boy. Come here Sadistic Prince I'll kill you!" Perm head said annoyed.

"Danna, I have a favor to ask." Sougo said with serious voice. "Take care of my family will you?"

Gin-chan looked at him with dead-fish eyes and said scratching his head turning away. "I won't."

"Danna!" Okita turned towards him with a surprise.

"I already have too many people to protect, so get your ass back to them alive and protect them your self. But…" He stopped before leaving the room. "You, Kagura and Aoi are also part of my family, so until you get back I'll look after them." That said Gin-chan left.

Sougo smiled for a minute thinking, Thank you, Danna. Then he switched his full attention to his enemy. "Looks like this is our last battle Fox, ready to die?"

"I won't be the one dying." He lowered his weapon. "But first since this is a last battle should I reveal my true self to you, Sougo Okita?" Moving his hands to his face Fox took out his mask. But even after seeing his face Bakaiser kept his poker face and was ready for a fight.

 

* * *

 

Hijikata and Kondo in front of the Fox's HQ.

"Kondo-san, we're waiting for your orders." Toushi said biting on his cigarette.

Gorilla nodded. "Ok, we should wait for the sign."

At that time Gin-chan came out picking his ear as he stopped beside the Shinsengumi commander, Kondo asked. "What happened Yorozuya? Where is Bakaiser?"

"He's having fun somewhere. Okay, Oogushi-kun you can fire your gun now."

Vein popped out on Mayora's head as he shouted. "WHO ARE YOU CALLING OOGUSHI, BASTARD? I WON'T TAKE ORDERS FROM A JACKASS LIKE YOU! DIE YOROZUYA!"

Gin-chan wiped his found treasure on Kondo's uniform and said. "Well, no matter if future or past or whatever time it is Oogushi is still Oogushi, after all Oogushi is much more better that being Mayora, even though I prefer Mayora since its easy to remember, so throw away your name, everyone remembers you better as Oogushi anyways."

"WHAT THE HELL, ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU MEAN! YOU USELESS YOROZUYA, JUST GO AND DIE!"

"Huh? Are you stupid?" Gin-chan said with deadpanned voice.

Vein popping on his face Toushi drew his sword. "Say your prayers Yorozuya-idiot!"

'Can you not fight in this kind of situation?' Shinpachi shouted through the walkie-talkie. 'We're in the middle of a serious fight and all you can do is fight? What kind of adults are you?

"Shut up Megane." Gin-chan said.

"Don't interfere with adults." Hijikata replied.

'I refuse to follow rotten adults like you! Now I understand Okita-san better.'

'I'm getting more and more people on my side Hijikata-san, you should be careful. Your death might be near.' Bakaiser said with deadpanned voice through the walkie-talkie.

"WHY ARE YOU INTERFERING BASTARD? AREN'T YOU SUPPOSED TO BE IN A FIGHT?" Toushi shouted with irritation.

'I am!' He said simply not bothering to deny. 'But bullying- Ops, I mean arguing with you makes my day.'

"You just said bullying, didn't you? Bakaiser you bastard you just said bullying! Get your ass back in here alive, so I can kick it!" Mayora ordered.

'Don't worry Hijikata-san I'll be back soon and then we can play.'

"I must be an idiot to allow my daughter to marry you." Gin-chan said.

'They didn't asked us, besides I could have died if I disagreed.' Silver Gintoki answered through his walkie-talkie.

Perm head looked at his walkie-talkie with bored eyes. "Yeah, I didn't expect anything less from a sissy like you."

'I SAID TO STOP CALLING ME THAT OR I'LL KILL YOU!'

"Eh? Then you won't be alive either. Heh! Too bad, idiot!" Gin smiled like a troll making the other even more pissed.

'You two stop fighting!' Patsuan ordered. 'By the way, Silver-san, where is Okita-san?'

'I'm here! Busy dealing with a crazy China girl, who's head over heels for me.' Sougo said with bored and calm voice, even though it could be clearly felt that he was fighting.

'Eh? What do you mean?' Patchy asked surprised, but it was also a question worrying all the others too.

'China is in her Yato-blood-full-power mode and she is attacking me.'

"WHAT?" Everyone shouted.

Okita continued with cool and bored voice. 'Honestly, why in the world did you marry her? She is a wild cat!'

'I married, so that I can tame her. And it was quite fun you know. Oh well, just wait and see.'

'What kind of reason is that?' Megane sigh tired of shouting.

"Oi, Oogushi tame your little Sadist captain." Gin-chan ordered.

"He is not mine bastard!" Hijikata shouted. "Besides if you're so worried then keep your daughter under control."

'As I said it won't help!' Silver commented.

'If you think that it's unbelievable then you should hear about Danna and Boss…' Bakaiser started, but stopped suddenly mumbling. 'Stop for a minute Fox!'

'Don't ignore me in the middle of the fight bastard!' His opponent shouted, but ignoring him Bakaiser continued. 'Hijibaka, where is Kondo-san?'

"Hmm…" Toushi looked at the walkie-talkie with questioned look. "He's right here. Why?"

'Is he near?'

"No."

'Can he hear me?'

"Yes, why are you asking all that?" Mayora asked loosing his temper.

'Have to cover up the truth.' Future Sadist said and continued. 'When Danna started dating a certain Shimura that China and all other women look up to, that was even more fun.'

'YOU IDIOT!' Silver shouted.

Before future Yorozuya leader could say anything Hijikata took over. "HOW WAS THAT COVERING UP THE TRUTH? EVERYONE ALREADY FIGURED IT OUT!"

Black shadows fall over Gin-chan. "W-wait a minute Souichirou-kun. What did you just say?"

'NO, I don't want Gin-san as my brother-in-law!' Megane protested.

"Shut up Patsuan! As if I'll even date your, raised by Gorilla's, sister! AND WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME AS YOUR BROTHER?"

'No way, no way! I don't want that.'

'Don't worry he will accept it as soon as I help him with his dream girl.' Silver Gintoki said waving hand in dismissal.

'Eh? My dream girl? I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?' Shinpachi shouted no believing.

"That's not the problem! You ruined my life!" Gin-chan shouted.

"There is another one with a ruined life in here." Toushi said as Kondo was crying in the dark shadow of the tank, which was aiming at the building.

"Toushi…" Gorilla pledged with runny nose. "Yorozuya finally did it, he stole Otae-san."

"Calm down Kondo-san! Those two are messing with you, probably." Devil vice-commander said biting down on his cigarette.

'No, we're not!' Silver and Bakaiser said in unison.

Vein popping on his head Toushi shouted. "CAN'T YOU TWO MORONS PLAY ALONG? USELESS SADISTIC DUO!"

Bakaiser sighs, continuing with his fight. (Honestly stop talking and get back to business). 'But honestly, when China and I decided to marry they accepted it easily; well not considering Baldy who was against it and Danna and Megane's little resistance. Most was happy that they won a bet.'

"They bet on us?" Sougo asked.

Bakaiser nodded as if his young self could see it. 'Yep, and don't worry I made Hijikata-san lose. Oh, right Hijikata-san you still owe me money, return it.'

"GO TO HELL BASTARD! AND WHY I SHOULD PAY FOR THE FUTURE?"

"Running from you debt is not good Mayora-kun and you're suppose to be police. Shame on you." Gin-chan said looking at the raven-haired man with dead fish eyes.

'As I was saying…'

Suddenly line got cut off, Gin-chan, Megane and Mayora looked at their devices, then they tried to connect again yet it didn't work. They were going to give up when another shout came.

Sougo shouted. 'KAGURA!' And then there was gunshot that made all three men stop on their places frozen.

"SOUGO!" Toushi and Kondo shouted.

'Okita-san! Kagura-chan?' Megane shouts at the same time with the others.

Gin-chan called out with loud voice together with the others. "Souichirou! Kagura?"

'Oi, Sadistic brat! Oi, do you hear me?' Silver called out. 'You know, in the future, you become my slave and follow me everywhere like a puppy. Did you hear me, Little Sougo?' When there was still no answer Silver cursed under his breath. 'Damn it! I'm going after them. Hold the fire for now.'

 

* * *

 

Fox's Hideout 1. While others were busy with their useless arguments present Sougo and Kagura were fighting.

It was one of the most fierce battle Sougo ever fought, for once, because Kagura was not herself, she was a beast attacking him without any sense not caring for her own life or for his. Plus, she released her Yato powers that she was always surpassing, they were more powerful and fierce than Sougo ever thought, he was managing to dodge her attacks and fight back, but this was proving to be hard.

Unexpectedly to himself he was also being careful not harm her seriously. Okita realized how stupid that was, but his body was moving on it's own. China once again charged in, fully open to be attacked, but determined to kill. He dodged the first blow, fighting back few times and landing couple of hits on her, but then she pushed back. Sougo fall on his back air knocked out of him as Kagura hit him with her umbrella full force.

Not letting him to stand up Kagura stood over him pinning his arms to the floor with her feet and looking down at him with a crazy smile.

Sougo glared at her trying to get free, but she was heavy, all the food she ate proves to be useful even though she was as slim as ever. Good that Anime characters don't get fat. His arms still pinned down by her he said with irritation. "This joke has gone too far China. Get back to your senses."

But she didn't say anything just kept staring at him with her blood filled eyes. "China, get off of me! I know you can hear me glutton monster! Stop this and get back to your damn senses. Where the hell is your usual annoying brat with potty mouth attitude."

Kagura pointed her umbrella right against Sougo's head ready to fire. He gulped down trying to free himself. "Oi, China! Stop! China… I said stop! China!"

She tightened her grip ready to fire. "KAGURA!" Sougo shouted at the last a second before the gunshot was heard.


	15. There are always happy ending and sad endings, but in Gintama there neither just the same old, same old.

It was dark; in front of her all around her everything was dark. Kagura couldn't hear or see anything only thing she knew was that she wanted to kill, she wanted blood, and China girl wanted at least something to paint this darkness. But suddenly the darkness disappeared and she was back to herself. Gintoki, Shinpachi and even that damn Mayora's voice with Gorilla were coming out of nowhere.

Kagura looked around to see that she was in unfamiliar place, but even if this was familiar she couldn't recognize it because the room was absolutely destroyed and there was blood everywhere. Last thing Yato girl remembers is that she was trying to beat Fox when he said that he will be taking Aoi if she didn't work with him, then she felt pain on her neck and it all went blank. Now she was god knows where, her clothes is thorn she is a mess and she was standing on something.

Frowning she looked down her eyes going wide. Sougo was lying under her, blood gushing from his wound as the Shinsengumi captain's face was showing pain and annoyance.

"Sadist!" Kagura shouted in shock. "What the hell are you doing under me?"

"You prefer for me to be on top then, China." Okita said with sarcasm and then ordered. "Get the fuck off of me!"

Yato girl stepped away releasing his arms, then vermilion haired girl kept looking at her rival with wide eyes seeing how fiercely blood was staining his clothes.

Sougo sit up holding his left shoulder from the pain and in order to stop the blood that keeps flowing. "Damn it, making me go through so much trouble and almost get killed, you're going to pay big time for this China."

Kagura sat beside him still silently looking at Sadist. He looked at her with poker face. "Honestly, just how much of an idiot are you? How can you aim at my head and shoot at the shoulder? That's way too clumsy, glutton monster! You should be thankful to God that it wasn't my sword-holding arm, or I would have killed you."

Yato girl didn't say a word, but just kept looking at his wound her eyes showing mixed emotions. Sougo was getting annoyed. "Oi, moron, why are you so quite? For about now shouldn't you start talking back at me with that potty mouth of yours? Its no fun talking alone."

Finally loosing his temper he hit her in the head getting her back to her senses. Vein popping on her face Kagura jumped up glaring at her rival with irritation. "WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING SADISTIC BASTARD?"

"You're annoying China. You've been sitting there saying nothing as if you're about to cry. Stop being such an idiot will you?"

"Who in their right mind will ever cry for you? Damn it, I regret missing the aim, I should have killed you bastard!" China shouted.

Sougo stood up still holding his wound, but his face showed no expression at all. "Heh? So you wanted to kill me China? But you could never do that, you're too much in love with me."

"Who is?" She shouted with anger. "Even if I die and reborn hundred times I will never even like you! Gross!"

Sadist smirked. "That's what you say, but you still married me right? And then right now you were definitely sad that you almost killed your beloved Sadist, me."

"I SAID THAT'S NOT IT!" Kagura grinned crossing her arms over her chest. "I was just thinking how did I missed from such a close distance, so I was going to try to shot again."

"Oh, China, so you can think? Bravo…" Sougo clapped his hands with fake amazement.

"Damn you bastard! You're pissing me off!" China shouted raising her umbrella, but she stopped herself remembering his wound.

"Oh~, see now China you can't even finish me off. Your love is that strong, huh, poor girl?"

She grabbed him by collar. "Don't get so full of yourself Bakaiser, the only reason why you're alive is because, if you're gone Aoi will disappear."

He arched a brow. "Is that all, China?"

Kagura smiled with superiority and stood up. "Of course, beside I probably married you because you begged me and I didn't have a choice, for Aoi's sake that is."

Okita smirked. "Oh, that's quite a sacrifice China, but a stupid one."

"What did you say?"

Suddenly Sadistic Prince gripped his wound tighter and sits down with painful expression. "Damn it! Oi, China hurry up and call an ambulance or I'll really die from blood loss."

"Heh! As if Sadists can die. Gin-chan said that sadists and psycho's don't die."

I have to have a talk with Danna later. "So you don't care if I die?"

"No!"

"What about Aoi then?"

"I'll think of something, after all you're not the only sand haired character. Plus, I don't want her to grow up as a Sadist."

"Why you-" He was about to say, but pain shot through him and he fall back on the floor.

Kagura looked at him surprised then sat beside him poking him on the cheek. "Oi Sadist are you ok?"

Vein popped on his face. "As if I can be ok, idiot? Don't you see that I'm wounded?"

"Oh, well… Take care." She wanted to stand up, but he pulled her down switching their positions, so that now he was pinning her down. "What the hell are you doing?"

"Trying to cover your worry as always China, you're such a bad liar." Sadist smirked getting close to her. "Oh, well I told you, right? That I will need a payment for all the trouble you caused me."

"Let me go, Sadistic bastard, jackass, moron, king of losers!" Kagura struggled, but it was obvious that she wasn't serious since for a Yato to throw off a wounded human was nothing and yet how come the girl who almost killed him few minutes ago wasn't able to do anything right now, that really made Sougo smile, but he hid that from her.

"What are you two idiots doing?" Silver asked standing not far from them.

"Danna?" Sougo looked at him with poker face.

"Gin-chan! Get this bastard off of me!" Kagura commanded this time really struggling and throwing Sougo off of her.

"You just did it yourself." Silver said scratching his head. "Come on hurry up, lets go."

"Yes." Kagura said happily and run to her guardian.

Future Yorozuya stopped looking at Okita. "Need help Sadist-kun?"

Sougo smirked walking pass him holding his wound, but with straight back. "I still have my pride Danna. Take care of her though, I made a mess out of her as always."

Vein popped on Kagura's head. "Who are you telling you messed up? Dare to say that again Sadist and I'll definitely kill you this time."

Silver sigh. "Brats!"

Suddenly Kagura stopped looking at Gintoki with worry. "Wait Gin-chan, we have to go back. We have to find Aoi-chan."

Future Yorozuya boss smiled gently and patter the girl's head. "I already received a call from Deva, she and Aoi are safe on Kamui's ship."

Yato girl sigh with relief when suddenly the words hit her. "With baka-nii? How can they be safe there? God now we have to go and deal with him. Great!" China exclaimed with frustration.

"Well, any other time I would agree, but since little brat is there he won't do anything, I think." Gintoki picked him ear with dead fish eyes.

"YOU THINK?" Kagura shouted.

Sougo shook his head and said with sarcasm. "It's not a good answer Danna."

"What are you...?"

Before Silver could continue or even start to argue with them Patchy shouted. 'Gin-san get out of there, all of you, fast!'

"What's wrong Megane?" Okita asked with poker face as Silver took out the walkie-talkie.

'Matsudaira-san is about to shoot. The countdown has already started." Megane was panicking.

"Oh, well let's get out fast then." Silver ordered.

"We won't make it on time." Sougo commented.

Future Gin looked at the young boy frowning. "What do you mean by that Okita?"

"That man only counts to one and fires." Sadist said with poker face.

Eyes going wide suddenly realization hit him and taking both brats, Kagura over his shoulder and Sougo under his arm, future perm head run like his life depends on it, well it does. Gintoki flee the building at the same second as Matsudaira said "One" and tanks fired wiping put the building.

"Gin-san? Kagura-chan? Okita-san?" Shinpachi run towards the three laying face down, they barely escaped the building on time. "Are you ok?"

"OF COURSE WE'RE NOT!" Silver shouted.

"Damn it, why does everyone ask the same question. How can we be ok after that?" Kagura asked pissed.

Drop fall over Shinpachi. "We'll that's kind of…"

"Oi, get off China!" Sougo ordered.

Kagura looked down to see that she was seeing on him, she smirked and jumped on him before standing up. Okita stood up glaring at her. "If I wasn't injured you would be dead China!"

"Heh, as if!"

"Waa~ Okita-san you're injured. I should call an ambulance." Patsuan panicked.

"Calm down Patchy. Sadists don't die." Gin-chan said picking his ear and approaching them together with Hijikata.

Toushi bite down on his cigarette. "Yeah, leave him be, that bastard has a natural healing ability."

"And once I'm healed I'll kill you Hijibaka-san." Sougo said calmly.

Gin-chan put his arm over Silver's throat strangling his neck. "Now tell me what the hell did you said earlier?"

Future yorozuya looked bored. "What do you mean?"

"WHO DID YOU SAID I WOULD DATE BASTARD?" Gin shouted.

"Haha~ Oh, that. Want to hear about it?" Silver released himself and dragged Gin-chan with himself to the side.

"You're as lively as ever." Deva said approaching them with Aoi.

Seeing her young parents Aoi let go of her mother's hand and run to Kagura and Sougo. "Mama~"

Kagura picked her up with a smile. "Welcome back Aoi-chan."

"Mama, Love you." Aoi kissed her happily.

China girl smiled, but then frowned looking at her older self. "So what took you so long?"

"Don't ask me. Baka-nii caused some trouble, so I had to take care of it."

Silver looked at her with dead fish eyes. "Don't tell me you fought again? Just how many times are you going to do that?"

Deva scratched her head. "Until one of us falls dead." She looked around frowning. "Oi, Gin-chan where is Bakaiser?"

Silver put on a poker face and didn't say anything it was Shinpachi who commented. "Now that I think about it, connection was lost earlier. We though that it's because of Okita-san being killed, but he is here, then that means…?"

"No!" Deva shouted.

Gin-chan scratched his head. "Geez, Megane calm down. I told you already Sadists don't die."

"But Gin-san…"

"Mama?" Aoi said troubled. At little girls voice Sougo looked at both Deva and Kagura, they both were looking down their bangs covering their eyes.

Suddenly someone hugged Deva from behind whispering in her ear with a smirk. "So your love for me is really that big, huh China?"

Recognizing the voice Deva pushed away hitting the man behind her, but sand haired older man dodged. Bakaiser was a mess, but he wasn't bleeding, his injuries were minor, he smirked. "Were you worried about me China? How sweet."

"Damn it Sadist! Why in the world are you still alive?" older Yato female shouted then cursed under her breath. "And here I was planning a perfect party for you."

Bakaiser smirked. "Really China? And here I thought you were about to cry."

"As if!" Deva shouted and wanted to hit him, but older Sougo dodged.

"Oi, Bakaiser, before you start your lovely-done game."

"Die Hijikata!" Both Okita said in unison frowning at Mayora.

But ignoring them Devil vice-commander continued. "Where is that Fox guy?"

Bakaiser looked at him with cold eyes. "He's dead!" It was the blunt answer.

Hijikata bite down on his cigarette. "I see."

"Now then China." Bakaiser approached his wife locking her arms behind her with one arm and hugging her with his other arm. "Give me my reward."

Deva frowned trying to get free. "What reward are you talking about, jackass? Let go or I'll really kill you!"

Bakaiser smirked not letting her go.

Looking at them with his poker face Sougo got an idea also, even though his injury is serious, but he can't miss this chance. Okita picked up Aoi who was happily playing with Kagura.

Little girl looked at her young father. "Pappy?"

"Go play with someone else, Aoi!" Aoi smiled and kissed her father's cheek.

"Love you pappy."

Sougo then put her down and returned his attention to Kagura who was frowning at him. "Now then China." He did the same thing as Bakaiser, but due to his injuries if Kagura resisted seriously he won't be able to hold her. "Since I went through all that trouble and even get injured because of you, give me my payment."

"Huh?" China girl stared at him with irritation. "What the hell do you want idiot? Do you have a death wish?"

"Who's fault is it China that I almost died?" Sougo said with cold voice and Kagura froze, he sure did hit the nerve. Sadist smirked like a devil. "Now then, what should I get?" And then he got their faces closer.

Gin-chan sighs scratching his head. "Geez, so annoying."

"Lets go brother. I have a story to tell." Silver put his arm over Gin-chan's shoulder dragging him away with him. "Treat me to some sake."

"WHY SHOULD I TREAT YOU TO ANYTHING? HANDS OFF BASTARD!" Yorozuya leader shouted and the two Sakata continued their way fighting.

Aoi climbed on Hijikata's shoulder. "Toushi~"

Toushi bite on his cigarette looking sideways at the baby on his shoulder. "How did you climb up there? Are acrobat?"

"Aoi wants to eat~"

"Go ask your parents."

"I want mayo, k?" And Aoi smiled like an angel she was.

Suddenly Mayora-kun stopped, finally finding someone who understands the greatness of the mayonnaise like him. (I don't know how this kid can be this loved by everyone.)

Deciding to not lose this chance Hijikata decided to take Aoi to one of his favorite places where he is a regular with his mayo obsession.

Shinpachi looked from one side to another. Both Gin-san were busy with their stories walking away, towards the bar to drink, till they're both unconscious. Sadistic Family a.k.a Bakaiser and Deva plus Sadistic couple a.k.a Sougo and Kagura were flirting with each other, of course if you could call fighting and trying to beat the crap out of each other flirting.

Patchy sighs cursing his luck and Author for not finding a cute girlfriend for him.

(Sorry, Shinpachi, I'll try to do that next time.)

Not believing it and ignoring those words Megane shook his head deciding to follow Aoi and Hijikata, since he was hungry and they were the only once who won't talk about future, marriage and him somehow still being a virgin in the future.

 

* * *

 

Two weeks later.

"So? Why are you still here?" Kagura asked pissed.

Deva didn't bother to answer and continued to read the old issue of Jump. "What do you mean? I'm on a family vacation."

"FAMILY VACATION' MY ASS! IT'S BEEN 2 WEEKS SINCE THE ARC WAS OVER, SO GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE!"

"How cold Kagura-chan." Deva pouted still not looking. "I thought you wanted to spend more time with Aoi."

Anger marks all over her face Kagura continued. "No, I want Aoi in here, the once I don't want to see are you and that Bakaiser!"

Future China sit up scratching her head, instead of her usual red too much revealing dress she was dressed in a white Chinese dress with same two splits on both side. "What do you want me to do? Because of all that we couldn't rest, so we took a vacation."

"GO HAVE YOUR SADISTIC FAMILY VACATION SOMEWHERE ELSE, WHERE I WON'T SEE!"

"You mean 'our' family vacation. Oh, by the way where are you going?"

Kagura suddenly calmed down picking up Aoi. "Taking Aoi for a walk."

Deva arched a brow at her little self. "In that dress? I don't remember taking a walk in such a cute dress."

"Shut up! It's none of your business. Lets go Aoi!" Yato girl turned to leave.

Deva grinned. "Say 'hi' to little Sougo for me."

"IT'S NOT A DATE!" And China stormed off.

Kagura laughed. "Who said anything about a date? I was such a brat."

"No different now are you?" Bakaiser entered the room.

"Leave me alone Sadist I want to sleep."

"Lets sleep together."

"No!" She said bluntly as his grinning face.

"Where is Megane and Danna?" he asked with curiosity.

"Shinpachi went to Otsuu concert and Gin-chan, well… It looks like before leaving Silver Gin-chan told him something about the future, so Gin-chan wants to try it out, that's why this past 2 weeks he's been going on dates with Anego."

Bakaiser put on an evil smile.

"Why are you smiling like that?" Kagura asked suspicious.

"I just remembered that I have to give you your punishment for running away."

China's eyes went wide. "I just remembered something. See you!"

Sougo grabbed her throwing her on the floor and pinning her arms and legs down. "No running China. Let me pay you back for all the trouble of the last couple of weeks."

"LET ME GO SADIST OR I'LL FREAKING KILL YOU!"

"Heh, we'll see."

 

* * *

 

Hearing the shout Kagura stopped in front of 'Snack Otose', giving a dead fish eyed look to her rival who was waiting for her and Aoi near the Shinsengumi car.

"What did you do Sadist?"

"Nothing… yet!" Sougo answered with his usual poker face. "What's with that disgusting look China? Ugly!"

"SHUT UP BASTARD! I DIDN'T HAVE ANYTHING BUT THIS, EVERYTHIGN ELSE WAS WASHED." China girl shouted but then smirked giving him the disgusted look. "And what's with you Sadist? Why are you in casual clothes, where is your ugly uniform?"

"Who do you thin I am China? As if I'll ever allow myself to be seen with two brats wearing a Shinsengumi uniform. Out reputation is ruined already."

Vein popping Kagura gripped her umbrella. "Who are you calling a brat, idiot? Oh, well it would have been a disgrace for my name as a queen to be seen with a tax robber."

Okita grinned teasingly. "But you still marry this tax robber."

"I might just reconsider, if I find a wealthy Baron."

"Dream on China beast!"

"WHY YOU-" Kagura was about to lose it when Shinsengumi car started moving.

"Mommy, daddy look~ Aoi is driving!" Aoi-chan shouted from inside the car smiling happily as she drove away.

Eyes going wide Kagura shouted. "YOU FREAKING IDIOT! WHO IN THE WORLD LEAVES THE KEYS INSIDE THE CAR WITH A BABY?"

Sadist scratched his head. "How should I know that she could drive?"

"SHE IS OUR DAUGHTER!" Yato girl shouted for the last time then jumped on Sadaharu running after her daughter and the car.

"I'm coming too." Sougo said from behind her, then he jumped on Sadaharu sitting on the dog holding tight.

"No way bastard! Get off!" Kagura shouted and keep trying to push him off. "This is my dog! Go find your own!"

"Calm down China or we're going to fall."

"FALL RIGHT TO HELL!"

 

* * *

 

And fighting like that they kept chasing the car.

"My, my they seem so lively just like always." Otae commented as she and Gin-chan saw Sadistic family young version running after the car with a baby driving. (Yep, it sounds weird.)

Gin-chan scratched his head looking with dead fish eyes. "Who cares? They're just brats."

Otae smiled at him. "So Gin-san, where are you taking me today?"

"Anywhere is fine. You pick." Perm head commented with bored voice.

"My, my Gin-san you're spoiling me too much. I might get used to it."

The end.


End file.
